Hey guys so i wanted to see if this could possibly be ocd or maybe something else idk lol and im not trying to like get reassurance km just curious cuz i’ve never thought about this until now. So my whole life especially recently since i’ve moved to college, i always analyze whether or not i fit in with people. I’ve always been pretty hard on myself my whole life aboit feeling different than my friends or just feeling like i don’t understand how everyone can just be themselves so easily and not anxious or how i think people are just more likable than me. i don’t know if that makes any sense, but i feel like i’ll hang out with a group of girls and then afterwords i’ll be like why do i feel like i wasn’t the same as them or why do i feel like they’re better than me etc. just constantly trying to figure out what’s wrong with me and why im different then them. I think that may have been ocd itself or maybe not im not sure. recently i’ve been struggling with trans ocd and my mind often likes to think back to that and how my whole life i’ve kinda worried about how i felt different than all the other girls . it scares me cuz it makes me think that maybe i really am not a girl and i just haven’t realized it until now. but now im realizing that those worries from my whole life might have just been ocd to begin with. idk if any of this makes any sense and im just rambling on and on but im just curious to see what u guys think
If you are in crisis, please use these emergency resources to find immediate help.
Does anyone avoid their favorite music to listen to because of OCD? I've been dealing with strong intrusive thoughts from trauma and I tried listening to one of my favorite songs just to clear my mind only for it to remind me of the situation..now I've been avoiding not just music, but anything nostalgic that puts me at ease because I don't want it to be associated with the new memories. It's been eating me for months to be quite honest. I don't know if it's just me.
Told my friend I might be trans. She said you could be am I was happy someone understood and possibly accepted me. But I feels weird I have so much doubt. Was it OCD in the first place? I just started panicking again. That I was lying to myself the whole time. Maybe I am trans. I still don’t feel gender dysmoria my mind was convince my name has been Stephanie instead of Steve. Im so lost was I just scared my parents would hate me? Why don’t I feel happy that I could be trans this is so weird.
I was pretty sure i washed my hands after disinfecting the 7 doorknobs with clorox and toilet paper and was pretty sure I used gloves but now my brain is telling me that I didnt and all the germs from the doorknobs and toilet paper and all the grime were on my hands and that I touched and changed my clothes with those hands and touched other surfaces. It’s making me feel very guilty and like I need to shower again. And i was wondering since I have contamination ocd why on earth would I do such a thing but my brain tells me that I did that because I was vaping for the first time in a long time and it made my memory bad so that I forgot to wash my hands. Clorox was seeping through the toilet paper so if I was not wearing gloves then I dont know what would make me not wash my hands after I was done. But my brain is very convincing right now. My therapist told me not to shower again today. I feel like a bad person for not showering again and I really wanna put my blankets in the laundry bc I laid there after this whole thing. I really hope this is false memory but I will never know. I don’t want to spread covid by wearing clothes that I may have touched after touching 7 dirty doorknobs. Even if I put clorox on the tissues before wiping the knobs, not all of the tissue was covered in clorox and the dry parts were also touching parts of the knobs. I touched all of those tissues so if I really did not wash my hands then I don’t know how to get over this. Should I just wash my clothes, shower, and wash my sheets and blankets incase?
Does anybody have some good workbook recommendations for ocd? I was looking at finding something I could really just scribble in and and have some guidence when I get stuck
How can I know if I have an intrusive thought or if it's a part of me?
Hey community, have any of you been on Prozac for OCD before? I'm a little skeptical and scared, I've been on an SSRI before and it didn't go great for me. I just want to hear others' experiences. Thanks!
Has anyone watched Pure on HBO Max? I’ve been watching it and I feel so seen lol
I’m a little worried. Something I was so stressed about yesterday. I don’t feel as much guilt for anymore and I had a decent day… but what if this really means idc and am that way
Cant even get out of my bed after waking up when half the damn day is already over, just laying here paralyzed by this depression and anxiety. Theres so so much proof, imagining myself with a woman feels unauthentic, and doing the same with a guy feels natural. Even before ocd I had trouble picturing myself with a girl. Now I feel like Im also a girl inside, whenever I see a straight couple or get straight thoughts, my mind replaces the girls face with mine as if Im doing those sexual and non sexual things both. I dont think it is intrusive bc it feels like I really want it, capable of doing it and that I actually am these things. Ive definitely figured it all out in my head and dont see a point in therapy anymore. Not only my sexuality but my gender too now. I wish I could take my lïfe somehow, i dont want to live.
Having OCD thoughts without the feelings behind them, is hilarious because they’re so insane. Which is why we do exposures :)
I’m wondering how many times a day I should try to do an Exposure and response prevention? I’ve had ROCD on and off for 25 years. I finally understand that it’s OCD and not me. I’ve been working on ERP for about a year, It’s really hard and I’m trying to chip away a little at a time.
Therapy has been great and all but having a bill almost 800$ makes me wanna quit. Everytime I pay for one session, 170$ more pop up. I can’t keep up
I’d rather drink today
I think my POCD came from me trying to convince myself I liked a guy I didn’t. I would have thoughts like “you’re just as attracted to your brother as you are to him” or “you could do this to a child and it would feel the same” and I don’t think I rlly remember what it’s like to really like someone.
About a year & a half ago i got this crazy memory that I basically had no clue existed but my mind convinced me it did. I talked with family and i knew in my heart that I didn’t do it. Recently a couple days ago the thought is back and i feel like I’ve done it. Im struggling so badly.
i'm passing my exams having ocd, i'm proud of myself i guess
A little bit about my situation: I have had other OCD symptoms throughout my life, but never ROCD until getting into my current relationship with my boyfriend. Before him, I was never in a relationship for longer than 6 months and I kind of developed a "well relationships aren't for me" mindset. Then I met him and everything changed. He treated me so well and he became my best friend. Around 6 or 7 months in, when things were getting more serious, I started having these waves of doubts like "maybe I should break up with him", "what if I don't love him", "do I even know him"....etc. These thoughts would bring so much intense anxiety and depression and I would obsess. This has happened off and on over the last almost 3 years. When I am not experiencing these thoughts, I have felt so in love and happy about planning our future. Over the last several months I had gotten a break from ROCD, I simply felt happy and in love. We constantly talked about marriage and our future. We have a dog together and we started looking at apartments. All good things. We found an apartment and signed our lease and I was so excited. Then a few weeks out from our move in date, I started to have doubts. "Am I doing the right thing", "Is he the right person", "What if we hate each other once we live together"....etc. I know these are normal doubts right before a big change but I just started obsessing again. I've had some moments of feeling okay and like I love him but mostly I've just been overcome with anxiety. We have only been in our new place for 1 month and I still dont feel fully settled in. Change is a big trigger for my anxiety and dissociation as well so that isn't helping the ROCD. I'm trying to feel happy and feel in love and feel connected with him but mostly now I just feel constant doubts and fears and then sadness because of those doubts and fears. And the worst part? Because I have been having such intense anxiety about the drastic change of moving as well from the ROCD, I just feel completely dissociated most of the time. I don't feel connected to him (or anything in my life/the world actually) so now my thoughts are like "I feel like I don't know him so I don't feel safe", "What if I never feel connected again", "What if I need to leave in order to get rid of this anxiety and dissociation", "What if I'm just feeling this way because I don't love him", "Maybe I should just pack up and run away"...Or I will obsess over things I might not "like" about him - like if we get into a disagreement or if he has a different opinion about something small, I get thoughts like "Wow I guess hes just an awful person". I've been checking myself constantly during "good moments" to see if I really feel anything. Its so exhausting. Like I said I struggle with dissociation and depression so when my anxiety or my thoughts get really intense and stressful, I tend to just shut down - I stop feeling real, I become disconnected and I just stop feeling anything in general. Its been a nightmare.
I am having the worst time. Its been just over a year and at this point I dont know if I have OCD, ADHD, anxiety or depression or anything else developing. All these things overlap one another and one moment i fixate on “that was an ADHD moment” “this is my intrusive thought/urge moment” “im feeling positive thoughts right now so i must be going through a mania” “i just over spent and wanna run from my problems” My life is chaotic, I fall asleep easily but staying awake and 3 am wake up calls is not fun. I do know that I want to get better. I want that positive glow! I dont want to feel like a stranger in my body anymore. I struggle right now as I hug my teddy in bed (years im 34 and snuggle a teddy haha), but one day I want and will look back and think dame that was a rough journey! You made it! 💚💜
Hi I am struggling with scrupulously and exententail ocd about the devil torture me after I die. So as a compulsion I made a deal with the devil to test if he was real and thankfully it didn’t come true but I’m scared that mabye he may still send me to eternal damnation. Pls help😭
Is this ROCD or not? I continuously keep having doubts about my feelings for my boyfriend. I’ve never had this before with my previous relationships and it’s really upsetting because this is the first boy that’s actually treating me like how i deserve. I feel like i’m in a bubble when it’s to do with him. I feel like i can’t emotionally get to him or connect to him. Whenever I think about him or see photos of him i get anxious and stuff. I know i want to be with him forever and i panic about it going wrong. I’m scared i’m going to end up giving in to the doubts and end it😞Whenever i think about the future it makes me anxious, it’s like i’m turning my emotions off. I keep crying after being intimate with him and i don’t know why, i’m panicking it’s because i’m losing feelings for him. I look at other couples and ask myself why am i not like them, why am i not in love like them. They make it look easy and it’s making me doubt everything. I’ve been with my boyfriend for 5 months and it’s amazing when i don’t have these horrendous doubts. He’s so patient with me and he loves me and worships the ground that I walk on yet and I still have these doubts. They came when our relationship started getting serious. I keep asking my friends and mum for reassurance if i love him and it’s making me so so sad. I feel like if i love him i shouldn’t be having these feelings. He’s not done anything wrong and i feel so guilty for it. Is this OCD or me? Plz help :(
I guess a sense of depression was the start of questioning my gender and getting TOCD. I always had the motivation to dress girly to get looks from boys and make myself pretty to be desired by them. Before TOCD I slightly lost interest in doing that anymore because I didn’t see the point. After that I got lost about me and my whole personality. I questioned if everything I do is just a product of what other people like and want from me. It is hard to go back now with this mindset. I do not even know who I really am. I just know I was happy as a girl a long time, I felt sexy and desired, I used to look in the mirror for hours, I always found straight relationships but now all the things I liked are connected to intrusive thoughts and confused with these feelings.
Has anyone else’s ocd made them feel like they should break up with their partner even though they KNOW they don’t want to?
To anyone struggling with HOCD let me tell you there is hope. HOCD was my first symptom I noticed from OCD, I had a horrible time with it and it started taking over my life, this was even before therapy. So i looked up what to do and just out of the blue started saying “maybe, maybe not” and even just flat out not reacting. My HOCD severly went down and today is one of my least common OCD symptoms. I still get the thougjts to this day but it doesnt matter because I don’t react. This is a lot easier said than done and took months of oractice and struggle but trust me for those who are really struggling just follow a few tips sith the end goal of no reaction at all bc the more you react ocd wins! Good luck
who also feels uncomfortable with peace at mind? like you feel like there is something to always worry about and when you don’t.. your brain searches for something in your past or worries about a future problem these cycles make me feel unsettled and always guilty like there’s just something i’m repressing and using these ocd phases as an excuse to not work on my other problems… etc
Does anyone else struggle with household chores too? Any tips?
Hey everyone I have a question, can we manifest our intrusive thoughts?
Race / Racism related OCD . . Is there anyone with Racism themed OCD? I've been really struggling with this taboo theme & I'm finding it hard to function/find myself avoiding people out of fear of being perceived as racist. I constantly worry that I'm being perceived as racist. I'm white, I consider myself to be an ally to BIPOC and to work on being anti-racist. Lately though, I get hit with a ton of intrusive thoughts about coming across as racist when I speak to a BIPOC, which causes anxiety, which my anxiety probably then appears racist to the other person. I can't imagine what BIPOC have to endure on a daily basis just because of their skin color, so I'm not trying to make this about me. I'm just wondering if I'm alone in this or if other people struggle with this OCD theme. To be honest, it's pretty severe and it's attacking my core, because this "theme" feels opposite to what I value (being an ally, fighting to be anti-racist & dismantle racism) & who I am. I can tell that other people notice I'm anxious, and I just hate that I'm displaying nervousness because I'm sure it makes the other person uncomfortable. I know I'm coming off as anxious to other people. I know it because I'm trying so hard not to be perceived as racist, to get the interaction "right", that interactions just get weird, anxiety filled & awkward & I'm sure the other person is like WTF, this person is a racist. I don't know how to stop getting so lost in my head.
Is it normal to feel guilty and like you are lying if you don't tell you S.O. about something from the past? Or something you believe? Or something else?
Does anyone struggle with thoughts of a uncomfortable or kinda disturbing memory image that just repeat over and over in your head even though you try not to think about it? And just in general does anyone have any tips on dealing with intrusive thoughts?
Does anyone else have a skin picking problem?
I’VE BEAT HOCD!!!!!!!
Worrying so about 6 weeks ago I blow my nose too hard and bleed but it about a week I got a yellow scab and it healed it went away but since then I keep getting yellow scab on both side of nose I haven’t been blowing or anything I just get them I m really worry about if this is a infection or what I m panicking because I m also pregnant any one going through this
I hate hearing love is a choice… when I constantly feel nothing for him… it hurts… when I am loving him it’s like I am faking it and leading him on… I avoid sex completely bc of it… I want to love him like before. I want to cuddle and hold him tightly… it’s everyday now… it’s like if I talk to him about this it’s like I am gonna break up with him… I just want to love him peacefully again. I’ve had mild ROCD for years and NEVER did it feel like this… It’s like I gave into and just want to give up but I know I don’t want to. I know if I leave I will wanna be with him again. It’s like my brain has flatlined when it comes to him…
anyone else get sad or frustrated whenever they see posts or people saying “it’s okay to have a few bad days” ? because almost every day is a bad day for me and i feel like my condition (my ocd, my way of thinking/feeling) is so unique and not many people relate to it. my ocd took over my life this isn’t just something i’ll “get over” like that. i’m extremely depressed and unmotivated and ive been this was for over a year and a half. i feel like i will never be able to move on from this.
How do you know if you have OCD or if you just are very afraid of an epiphany you don’t want to have?
currently thinking i’m probably bi but i think heterorelational (i don’t think that is a word), but my head says that means i have to break up with my bf bc i’m lying and maybe i only think i like him because i’ve never been with a woman.
no matter what ocd theme you have, i wanted to remind you that your ocd thoughts do not define you and you are not hard to love at all, everything will be fine. i am here if you want to talk 💜
How not to be afraid of OCD coming back after you recover? I've already done that, but I can't find strength to do it again.
Is this normal? I’ve been with my boyfriend for 5 months and he makes me so happy and is the best boyfriend i’ve ever had. He literally worships the ground l walk however i can’t help but doubt my own feelings for him. I obsess over everything to do with him and it’s making me depressed. I keep asking my friends and mum if I love him when deep down i know i do it just feels stuck somewhere. I feel like i’m stuck in a bubble. Is this just relationship anxiety and ocd?
Guys, look up serotonin by girl in red right now!!!! I just heard it on the radio, it’s a song about OCD! I almost cried when I heard it! Let’s keep spreading awareness!!!!! 💜
I need to say this once again, don't do your compulsions. Letting go of my compulsions certainly opened a door to long term relief. I used to grab onto any compulsions I could, let it be google searching, ruminating or seeking reassurance. Recently, I've been doing my best in resisting my urges, and the upsides are extraordinary. Though I would fail to resist once in a while, one fail doesn't indicate complete failure. This is a long journey, I don't have to worry about small mistakes. Recently, my thoughts have been about harming myself to _____, but hey, it doesn't matter. Today, I was triggered by a tiktok I'be stumbled upon, but I was ruminating way less than previous episodes. Nowadays, I never google search or seek reassurance from others. Though it's hard to let go of rumination, progress is progress and I'm doing great 👍 Compulsions are the reason your OCD is alive, by letting go of them, you are opening the door to immense relief, for the long term. It may not be full recovery for me, but I can still carry on day-to-day chores and live my life! ❤️ Easier said than done, but it doesn't have to all happen overnight. Keep trying, resist your compulsions until the urge subsides, then you'll realise that you don't need compulsions, you are fine on your own.
Someone told me about a psychologist who had great success with ocd by eliminating mental compulsions, as by his theory without compulsions there is no ocd. He had a lot of great points about rumination and mental compulsions but I forgot his name, can someone help me?
I don’t know what to do. I’m so so scared I’m in denial. 7 years now this theme has been plaguing me on and off but what if I am just making ocd an excuse? I just want to be with my boyfriend, I don’t think I want to be with women but what if deep down I do? I’m really struggling. I’m so sorry. I don’t want to reassurance seek but I feel like I can’t even help it at this point.
I just want to wake up one day and not have intrusive thoughts anymore
I just did ERP with coming out later in life videos, and it made me scared that one day I realise that all these ocd / attraction in reality are real. Anyway guys, the answer is always the same May be - may be not The important thing is to stop ruminating non tonsolve our sexual orientation Have a good day
My partner and I have been kind of exploring the intimate side of us lately and it’s good, we talk about what we like and what we want to try. I feel like I’m finally letting myself be sexual again without going nuts. But what’s scary is that’s there’s things I like that I never really thought of before that I want to try with my boyfriend and I’m worried that with time the more I explore with my boyfriend I’ll realize I want more and that he won’t satisfy me anymore or I’ll realize I was never actually into him but actually into women. I also get scared because I love the fantasies in my head but I pick apart at his appearance when looking at him and it makes me feel guilty. In my fantasies we’re both perfect because I’m not thinking of every little detail, just the general idea of us together but in person I notice and feel like I have to like everything about him from head to toe. I’m just scared… I want to let go and explore with him more but I don’t want to leave him behind
Did any one else see Taylor swift’s all too well short film? I have pocd. So while I was watching it all I cousin think was I wish I could be normal and fall in love and experience all these things in life casue im so scared of everything about relationships and I just wanna be normal but I everyday I get moments where it feels too real ya know
Lately I've been trying not to get hung up on my dreams. I've been trying to find every reason not to, but the dream I just woke up from turned so horrible so fast. It started with a girl rejecting me and my reaction was deplorable. I stood there shocked that she could say no to me, isn't that concerning? The situation escalated pretty quickly, and at the end a woman basically told me that I'm being spied on. It was all a mess that wasn't even the catalyst. I know it's just a dream, but the people in my dreams seem so real. I can't believe I behaved the way I did. I'll be ruminating on this forever now.
One word. Trust.
Can ocd make you feel like you arent yourself anymore
I remember being little and complaining to my mom that I could feel my bones. Anyone else have this experience? Also I realized recently that I’ve always used counting to help with anxiety, because I used to be terrified of death and the meaning of life and when I would panic about it I would count. And I had never really thought about it before, it’s just something I did.
Well I really thought this was ocd for 10 years but I’m realizing I’ve been in denial this whole time what made me hang on to it so long I think was because at one point I did like girls but with how much avoiding I do now and the suicidal thoughts at hand how much I don’t want to show my face hats off to the actual gay people out there takes some serious guts to come out that will be my next part of my journey not looking for response here just needed somewhere to vent I really hope you all find peace though!
I just thought of a challenge for everyone, when we’re triggered and want to open this app to seek reassurance or announce that we are triggered, let’s open a game app instead and play 5 mins until you’re relaxed some and can continue your day
There is nothing wrong with you. You have a fear of uncertainty. That fear can fade when you realize that uncertainty is unavoidable, people without OCD are faced with the same level of uncertainty as you! I believe in you!
Does anyone get stuck on a specific intrusive thought that continues for days and days that it’s just in the back of your head? I can’t get it out of my head that idk if I would enjoy having sex with a women and I can’t get it out of my head. I keep trying to figure it out but I know that’s bad. But how would I know the truth if I’ve never done it? This is so hard.
Message of hope for those with rOCD* I experienced severe rOCD for the first 6 months if this year and it almost crippled my relationship with my partner. But through therapy through NOCD, alongside support from my family and partner and medication I have basically completely recovered and have been feeling so good for the last 4 months. I had a session with my psychiatrist this morning and be said that I had recovered so well that I could look at coming off medication very slot at the start of next year which I am really happy about because I am having some annoying aide effects. So, I want you to know this... No matter what your mind is telling you, if you have been diagnosed with rOCD, or if you think you might have it, you can get through it. At my worst, I completely lost track of reality for a period of time, I absolutely hated myself and truly believed that I would never feel better or love anyone ever again. But through persistence and hard work, I did the ERP and worked on myself and I have come through the otherside. Undoubtedly there will be set backs, but I plan to deal with those as I did with this period. I wasn't always kind to myself, but please be kind to yourself. OCD is so challenging, but if I can get through it, so can you 🙏❤️
Has anyone read “BrainLock” by Jefferey Schwartz? What was one thing you learned from it?
How frequently do people do erp? I do it once or twice a week in session, and my therapist has told me to do the amount I can but that’s rather vague to me and she won’t give me specific targets. For me personally it would be motivating to here what amounts others have done that have really worked. I hear after 12 sessions people experience significant improvement but I’m wondering, does that include a lot of out-of-session therapy? Thanks
Is anyone only diagnosed with OCD tendencies + other disorders Rather than OCD itself?
is mindfulness good or bad? should i keep doing it?
hello everyone! i havent been here for a while, and i am just here to tell you that i have overcame my obsessions!! trust me, it does get better. i did my exposures, felt scary at first, but it got better. then, any time i would get an intrusive thought, i would ignore it and it would go away on its own. no compulsions at all. i am at least 2 and half weeks "clean" from my thoughts and they no longer bother me. i feel so free and as soon as i started getting better, i started getting the clarity. i hope this will be your motivation to keep going because it really does get better. ive had this obsession for 5 months. 5 months of hell. now i am doing great and im so happy. please, never give up. all the hard work will lead you to where am i. you may relapse, i did too few times, but remember, recovery is not linear. you will have ups and downs. but its all worthy in the end. sending much love and support to everyone struggling!
“Stop researching every aspect of it and reading all about it and debating the pros and cons of it. Start doing it.” -Jocko Willnik
Happy Sunday, my fellow OCDers! I just wanted to remind you all that you’re strong as heck for being here. This is NOT an easy disorder to live with. So, a self-compassion reminder that we’re all hurting and none of you are alone. We’re all humans here ♥️
“Breathing in, I calm body and mind. Breathing out, I smile. Dwelling in the present moment I know this is the only moment.” -Thich Nhat Hanh
“People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar.” -Thich Nhat Hanh
“To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself.” -Thich Nhat Hanh
What's your reason for fighting? I want to be more present with God and with neighbor. I want to be a good example for those who look up to me. I want to have the energy to do more good. How about you?
Brothers and sisters what a beautiful thing it is to trust completely in God and move forward into uncertainty and to trust the therapy He has sent our way knowing that He holds our hand and never let's go leading us towards Him every step we dare take forward! Glory be to God amen.
all my meds are empty and I'm supposed to get prescribed new ones this week. my psychiatrist was supposed to have a phone chat meeting with me and canceled since it was Thanksgiving week. I was talking to my bsf and I heard my little cousin in the background and got triggered and I'm trying not to have an anxiety attack. Any suggestions?
my POCD played New tricks on me again today, I'm really in the worst of it when things were going better! Yesterday I was in sport and I saw a 12/13 year old girl dressed like a sexy adult, I don't know why but I wanted to watch her, it obsessed me, in the evening I did not take it into account but in the morning I woke up in panic because I dreamed that she was flirting with me. I had the misfortune/error to do my compulsions on checking tiktok and I saw the videos of a girl born in 2008 who really looked like an adult with the makeup, the posture, the shapes of the body even her face I find it rather built! I can't stop thinking about it, and i'm very scared. What if I was really attracted? I was already afraid of being attracted to people aged 17-18 but here I'm really panicking!!!
“Don’t expect to be motivated every day to get out there and make things happen. You won’t be. Don’t count on motivation. Count on discipline.” -Jocko Willnik
Are there any other Christians struggling with Real Event OCD? Specifically being able to differentiate between if it’s the OCD making me feel like I need to confess to more people or if it’s actually guilt coming from the Holy Spirit that is trying to convict me so that I will talk with elders in the church or something, etc.? For a tad more information in case it helps you respond to me- The “real event” wasn’t any action(s) that I committed. It was just thoughts/feelings that I had that were inappropriate. I never acted on them and never would. I even prayed them away when I had them at times, but I don’t think it’s fair to call them intrusive either. I feel like they were my thoughts/feelings. I already confessed to my husband 728734 times and will be talking to a counselor in January (first she had available), but in the mean time I am struggling very, very badly. It’s led me to being very depressed and my mind constantly swirling like a tornado. It’s also led to lots of other “themes”… also, I’m new to OCD. I’ve only been seen in the past professionally very briefly for “general anxiety” although it’s starting to become clear to me that I’ve had OCD all along.