Help :( so the last place I lived a left in a HUGE GROSS mess ( I was so scared of germs I just stopped cleaning or moving about in my flat it was awful and scary ) . When I moved out my dad had to spend 5 days cleaning it out and he was absolutely furious bc I didn’t help out of fear of the dirt. I’ve apologised to him and he doesn’t stop going on about how “ horrific and unbearable it was for him “ even though I offered to pay for a cleaner to do it . He keeps saying how I’m untrustworthy and awful person and he comes round to my new place and inspects in all the time . I feel heartbroken how he doesn’t realise how ill I am and I rlly didn’t mean for it to happen. I feel so misunderstood and he just keeps insulting me . Now both my parents hate me for the things ocd makes me do/avoid. I’m at a loss :(

That sounds terrible. <3 Learning to manage OCD is a long and difficult process, and emotional support is important. It's possible that your parents may simply be extremely worried about you, (anxiety sometimes expresses itself as frustration/anger); still, their actions strike me as surprisingly cruel, especially given what you are struggling with. I'd like to preface this following word of advice by mentioning that I'm not a psychologist - take everything I say with a grain of salt, and if you are able, speak with a therapist about the best course of action. So, the way I see it, there are multiple moving parts here - OCD and your parents. You need to keep working on managing OCD, not for your parents, but for yourself. This means cleaning your home and not letting OCD affect your living conditions for your own sake - if it spirals out of control again like it did before, you need to contact someone for help and not continue to live in an unhealthy environment. With regards to your parents, I would try to communicate and understand their reasoning before doing anything else - they might have good intentions/feel really worried about you and have an unhelpful way of showing it. However, if they continue to refuse to listen or try to understand how their actions have affected you, then you are well within your rights as a grown adult to remove yourself from situations involving them. I know that sounds kind of extreme, but if they're really not listening and this is contributing to depression, it may be a course of action worth considering, at least for a little while. Whatever you decide, I hope that you're able to get through this okay and find a way forward. <3

I know you said that you tried therapy and it didn't work. What type of therapy? Traditional talk therapy does NOT work for OCD. Have you tried doing ERP?

I'm so sorry, this sounds so terrible to be treated this way. Do uou gave OCD diagnosis? Don't they know? Are you in treatment? Once upon a time I was in a similar situation with the landlord, I felt so ashamed. I hope you'll get treatment and support, you are worthy of understanding and support from people who care.

I think you really need to talk about your contamintion ocd and about all different types of ocd how much fear disstress it causes how your day to day half is struggle . Beacause people who dont have ocd will never know the real struggle of who have one.

Your parents do not hate you! So don’t say that! If they don’t know you have ocd then it’s understandable how your father reacted. I know it’s difficult but you need to inform them of your OCDif not already.

I’m sorry. Maybe try to have a talk with them. They love you and I’m sure they will understand.