just confessed at the worst Damn time I’m so annoyed with myself literally tonight something quite bad happened in my boyfriends family and I call him to confess something from the past and it just really upset him because of what happened and then I called him just to tell him this and I’m so angry with myself I knew it was a bad idea but I was anxious and being selfish to relieve my own anxiety I’m scared I’m going to ruin everything with this. I just need to vent I know it’s all my fault but it’s so hard to live like this sometimes I am so mad at myself for being insensitive and selfish like this. He knows im like this and have ocd and anxiety but idk if he understands the extent of how this controls my brain and how I think and how it’s leads me to act so if he doesn’t break up w me or something I wanna have him read something about it but god I suck for doing this I feel like he deserves way better.

OCDHaver

Date posted: 3y

I have this feeling a lot too, it’s hard because even though he’s going through something, OCD always pushes us to act impulsively, you’re not a bad person, you just need to try and seek professional help for your OCD

Junior96!

Date posted: 3y

Hey , I wouldn’t over react to the situation because it’s going to heighten your anxiety . I’m hoping that you are able to sit down with him and explain to severity of your OCD because that would be helpful . I believe he’ll have some understanding in regards to your situation especially if he really likes/loves you . Now that you know confessing in this manner can be a compulsion , you’re able to make better decisions moving forward . The hardest part about OCD is giving in to our compulsions . It’s so much easier said than done . You telling him something about the past could have been important to discuss because it involved your relationship . Be proud of yourself for discussing the manner and showing honesty regardless of how old the situation is . Try to look at the bright side of this . When you feel anxious and you start spiraling take a deep breath , fix your focus and come back to the situation . Sometimes , it’s good to get some time away from the situations so that you can make better judgment. Don’t give in to every compulsion as it is very unhealthy. As you do counseling , you’ll be able to distinguish the compulsion and channel your focus . I hope that all is well with your relationship. Don’t over react to it . Take a breather and allow yourself some grace .

cutefluffybu...

Date posted: 3y

This was a very kind and helpful response I appreciate it. Now I’m just anxious I’m going to ruin everything lol. I do want to sit down with him and talk about the severity of it, I’ve told him other stuff that I think relates to my ocd/ just my trauma and stuff but I even found an article that helps explain confessing as a compulsion so I’d like to show him. I just feel terrible for acting out irrationally and telling him this instead of focusing thag energy on making sure he was okay after sometning horrible happened, it makes me feel like a bad girlfriend even though I care so much I didn’t show it in the right way. I hope he can forgive me. I’ve recently started going to therapy again and I have a dr appointment to maybe take medication so perhaps it will help. I’m making an effort but I feel like I should do more? Idk I do need to take a breath and not give into my compulsions when the anxiety arise and wait to see if it’s really something worth bringing up. I’m also fearful that this behavior is just toxic and abusive and I never wanna do that :( ugh but thank you a lot

Junior96!

Date posted: 3y

It’s not intentional . You weren’t trying to dismiss his issue and just bombard him with your own issue . When your anxiety is heighten , we tend to just give immediately into our compulsion . Give your self some slack . Hopefully he understands . Don’t worry

ccheney0

Date posted: 20w

I can't stop confessing to my boyfriend

I can't stop confessing! I have this urge to dump on him every thought and wrong doing I've ever had and its destroying me! Im worried it'll destroy us too. When we started dating I stole a story from a friend to make myself look cool which was pathetic. But its the only time I remember doing anything like this.

Mid-life adults with OCD

eafik36

Date posted: 17w

Stuff

It’s getting so bad I think I’ve been dealing with scrupulosity but I’m always doubting if it’s actually ocd or if I’m just telling myself that as a excuse for being a “bad Christian”. It’s not only that, it’s everything I have had ocd thought loops in the past but they’ve been so unbearable lately and once one goes away another one starts. It’s been really focused on making me feel liek everything is my fault and I don’t know how to stop that when it actually could be. Then there’s this guy we were talking and he was telling me what he needed out of a relationship and asked me to tell him the same and now I’m so scared I’m gonna ruin something he said trust is really important to him. I was taking to one of our shared friends about us and I’m scared I said something he wouldn’t wanted me to say and that he’s not going to trust me now and I keep thinking about how I really should not have talked to her and it’s killing me. I’m also scared that I’m not gonna tell him something that happened in the past because I don’t think it’s important and he’s going to find out and be mad I feel like rocd is ruining my relationship that’s not even a relationship yet. I just keep thinking through all the different scenarios how I could ruin us up or it could work and I promise myself it will be the last time I think about it and it never is and it’s just constant from the moment I wake up to the moment I sleep and then I think maybe Gods just trying to warn me but I’m so exhausted or being this anxious because that doesn’t seem like Him but then maybe it is and I’m just trying to get what I want. I want to ask for help so bad but every time I do it feels like there really isn’t anything wrong and I don’t actually have any ocd. I don’t want to talk to my family about it, when it’s come up before they either make rude comments or make fun of me for it they really just don’t understand and I don’t know what to do anymore. sometimes it doesn’t even feel like it’s worth getting better tbh. Thank you for reading it all if you did :)

Anonymous_co...

Date posted: 16w

I’m so tired

I’m ruining my relationship, and idk if it’s OCD or if I’m just an awful person. I’m tired of constantly fighting with my boyfriend. but I have no one to blame but myself. I can’t stop picking apart everything they say, I can’t stop being so negative, I can’t stop overthinking and obsessing, I can’t stop feeling like they’re lying or being inconsistent. I constantly ask too many questions to the point where I feel he thinks I’m stupid. I’m starting to feel stupid myself. It seems like I can’t understand basic conversations with my boyfriend anymore unless they’re super black and white. He deserves better. I don’t deserve love. I feel like I’m destroying the one thing that makes me happy. I don’t feel happy with him anymore because we’re constantly fighting. And it’s all my fault. I think I’m just an awful, crazy person

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