I get obsessed over simple things (like dialogues) that I feel like I didn't fully understand (when in reality I do) and my mind gets stuck in a loop. I find myself overanalysing a sentence, a dialogue. It's like if I were stuck in an endless circle of thought. Has anybody ever felt like this?

I think I have OCD since last year but I just realized that I’ve got OCD this year even I haven’t been to any mental clinics or hospitals to test if I have OCD or not. I realized i have OCD this year when i watched movies or videos but i feel like to watch them again and again to check some specific sentences in that movie. Like if that video has subtitles and there are always have some phrases or sentences that make me read, look at every single words of that thing. Even sometimes i check that thing just want to know at the end of that sentence has a dot or comma, kind of like that, i know it’s hard to describe about these situations for me even i know checking these things doesn’t help me anything in my life but the more i watch, read and focus at any details in anything i look so when i remember about something that i watched or red, if i cannot remember exactly all the words of that sentence in the movies, videos, post i feel like to check just know what it is again. Most of my compulsions are related to anything i look, watch or read in my phone. Even sometimes i feel like to check if that is just an account name of anyone, comments on social medias. And before i had so many bad problems with doing things to just “feel right” after i watched those movies and videos. There were some rules that came in my mind so when i watched them again - i had to click this, touch this, replay this over and over again in the video or even look at video duration at the end. There are so many things that i did before that i couldn’t describe enough but i just want to say i used to want to complete many missions in my mind to just feel right or feel completed. If i don’t complete that stupid mission (i called it stupid because i kept me stuck with my life), I’m gonna do it again and again whenever i free until i finish it. At the moments, i don’t have any stupid missions to do about those things i watched but still have some thoughts about them and want to check to know what they are. Can anyone help me with my problem about OCD? My English can not be really good as I’m not a native English speaker. Thanks.

Does anybody else experience OCD while reading? I feel like i need to remember everything in my book. And i have a feel that i need to completely understand EVEYTHING in my book (even very minor things) and if not, i feel as though im cheating or that the minor thing is very significant and that ill want to remember it even way after i finish the book (just for the purpose of knowing EVERYTHING about my book) Also, when a character says some minor things i feel the need to understand it completely or i feel the fear that i didn’t understand what the character actually meant. If youve struggled with this please give tips on how to overcome it

There’s this one situation that I haven’t stopped thinking about from last night . So basically, I was reading 'The power of Now' which is a book that I love so much and really got me into spirituality. It’s been so helpful for my OCD and rumination but it’s also been pretty triggering for it as of late, so I’ve taken a long break from consistently reading it. The excerpt I read was about abundance and how its not about being bountiful, necessarily in material things but realizing and being grateful for the things that exist in your life now and in doing so, you will open yourself up to more good things. I understood it but I re-read it a lot because I didn't feel confident enough to explain it to someone else. but otherwise I LOVED IT. It made me feel so at peace, I agreed with it, and it gave me hope to start focusing on the good things in my life rather than the bad. So when I went to bed I rehearsed myself explaining it to someone on a podcast and then all these questions started flooding in like “why should I only focus on the good and aren't we supposed to accept the good and bad? Aren’t those the values of Buddha and spirituality” “Ya, we're supposed to accept the good and the bad but why?- so we can feel more good??? And isn't the point of OCD to not label things as good and bad? and why should I focus on the good- so I can feel good? why should I feel good? because I'm worthy of it? why am I worthy of it? because I'm a good person and do good things? well I’ve also done bad things so why shouldn't I consider that. I just don’t understand why I should feel good without it being selfish. And then this went on for like 2 or 3 hours. Like holy shit. I over explain these ideas and concepts that I resonate with to the point where they don't even make sense to me anymore. It becomes very existensial very quick. And I’m not suicidal but these questions make me feel hopeless in society for some reason?? And myself. Like if everything contradicts everything then what’s the point to life? If nothing can be understood or explained in a senseful way, then how do people move forward and make decisions, like AT ALL? There’s never a right or perfect answer and I feel like with any decision I make in regards, I’m doing a compulsion either way. If I don’t answer them, then I’m avoiding it and if I do then I’m checking and seeking reassurance. I’m sorry if this was way too long and over-explained I just need some advice or to know if anyone can relate in any way. Also, I’m sorry if some of those back-to-back questions were triggering.