How can I know if I have an intrusive thought or if it's a part of me?

I have been ruminating on why I have been having intrusive thoughts on a specific topic. Anyone know why? Where do they come from? It freaks me out and makes me think that it came from a real memory (I struggle with false memory OCD)

I been dealing with intrusive to the point it feels like I think them idk what to do I feel like a monster.

Help! My OCD has caught onto this thought for awhile and I keep spinning on it. I know you are supposed to follow your values and what your actions suggest with OCD, but what if that is even blurry right know? For example my whole life I wanted to be with a man, and now my OCD is having major intrusive thoughts about women. How do you tell if those thoughts are wanted or not? I can’t figure out if I like the thoughts or not. I’m trying to live the life “I want” but what if I don’t know what that is?