- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I feel like you are describing my life. It’s 8:15am where I stay and instead of being up im still in bed. It’s painful to move. I am exhausted from all the overthinking. Worse I have a 17 month baby. All we can hope for is a miracle that soon we will feel better. Like our old selfs. Stay strong and we are hopeful this season will pass.
- Date posted
- 3y
God bless your baby . We have a 2months old baby . Having OCD makes parenting so hard for me . I’m being selfish because of my moods , depressions and anxieties . It impacts me because I don’t even have a desire to parent or to spend time with my wife and child . I just want to lie down and be isolated . I completely understand your situation and I’ll be praying for you
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m sorry about that, I’ve read a lot of stories from people with Post Partum OCD, the stress and responsibility of a new born baby is difficult but coupled with OCD, I can’t even imagine. Just know I’m rooting for you and can tell how strong you are, sending my best!
- Date posted
- 3y
@OCDHaver Hey , that means a lot ! I’m rooting for you as well . I’ve noticed your journal entries are being posted frequently. Look forward to seeing my comment on it daily . I’m here for you ! We all are ! We’re in this together!
- Date posted
- 3y
Hey , I can relate as well . I’m going through the same thing . Wanting comfort and constant reassurance is what comes with OCD . We just have to learn how to not entertain it . I understand the constant regrets and revisiting of the past because I do the same thing . Analyzing the old positives in my life makes me hate the new current stage of my life . I always use words such as “ I wish , I miss when .. , or even how come I’m not like this anymore..” . Those phrases and words give room for the OCD to bully us even more . We have to take what’s in front of us , trust the process , learn and become stronger than ever before . Find things , if at all possible , that’s going to enhance your mood and motivation . You have to write down and brainstorms things that you enjoy and go enjoy it ! This is a a process but I encourage you to remain strong . It’s worth it . Let’s not let our present impact our future . Lord willing , our future is brighter and bigger . It’s how we choose to approach this trial and tribulation which determines our character , future and victory!
- Date posted
- 3y
Reading this has lifted my mood. Going to follow your advise and start writing things and carrying them out. And stop dwelling on the past. As much as the present hurts, we can alter it by our thoughts. Easy said then done, but we have to be determined. Change is within us. Thank you for your encouraging words. I would also love to form some support group. Knowing you are not alone makes one not feel isolated and doomed.
- Date posted
- 3y
@Victorious And this is why I like to encourage people . Although , I’m going through a lot , you honestly made my night because you are encouraged and inspired to do better . This is awesome ! And yes , please make support groups . I believe it’s just an addition to the individual ERP that we all get . It enhances the help . I’d love to have my wife alongside because she’ll really get insight on what I’m going through . She’s such a blessing , howeve at times , she’s not able to understand. Totally not her fault . Support group would be ideal !
- Date posted
- 3y
Also , if I could converse with you all every day and make friends so that we get through this together , I would ! I look forward to certain posts because it gives me the opportunity to encourage or even make someone smile ! I’m learning that in spite of what I’m going through , I’m able to help so many people . You wouldn’t believe the stories and people I’ve met . It’s amazing . It’s truly a blessing to encounter people who understand you and want the best for you . Everyone is empathizing together . It’s beautiful. Don’t let this define you !
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m so glad you’re going to be starting treatment with an ocd specialist soon. I know waiting to start can feel like the worst part. In the mean time, you may want to buy an ocd workbook, like The Mindfulness Workbook for OCD. That way you can be prepared for your sessions and feel like you’re doing something to help yourself as you wait. Things will get better with treatment. This is a tough illness but it’s also very treatable. Especially when addressed early on.
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you, I hope everything goes well this next month
- Date posted
- 3y
It will !
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
back in october i made my first post about my specific type of ocd, how it mixes in with my day to day and how i “deal” with it. i talked about the starting point, how it gradually got worse, and then how it was going just a few months ago. i always think it’s insane how much can change in just the course of a small to a large amount of time. right now, i honestly feel like garbage. to be quite sincere i really want to give up, i’m barely holding on by a thread. and if i cut that thread, i really doubt anyone would care. i’ve never considered myself to be a suicidal person, and i still don’t consider myself that right now. it just gets to a point where it’s just, a lot to deal with. i don’t really enjoy things a lot nowadays. sure i have good days like everyone does, like today, when i was just enjoying my day without worries. but then it all comes crawling back twice as bad the following days. i take online college so i’m usually just stuck at home most of the time. but, when i do decide to actually go out and leave my house, my ocd just explodes because i have this whole routine i need to do or else i feel like i’ll contaminate wherever i end up going. i’m not going to go really deep into my compulsions because it’s hard enough to live with them, much more having to type them all out in detail. but when i go out my compulsions go from wiping down all my stuff i’m going to use after showering, to washing my clothes/cleaning the washer + dryer. i also have separate things (or two of the same thing) i use specifically in my house, and items i use when going out. such as shampoo/body wash, deodorant, lotion, hair curler, etc. as if that’s not draining enough, i also feel the need to fast a couple days prior to any plan i make because i’ve forced myself to believe i need to feel empty in order to be clean. i’m not sure if that’s my past eating disorder talking, or my ocd, but my brain can’t help but think any food in my house is utterly and completely contaminated. i’m so tired of this feeling, feeling like nothing will ever be clean again. feeling like my ocd is trapped in my childhood home. feeling that wave of diseases rushing through my veins the moment i step foot into what’s supposed to be “home”. and i’m so scared of therapy because what if i do get healed, and then everything comes rushing back the second i step into my room. i’m planning on moving somewhere far from my current house in this next coming year, so sometimes i feel like just waiting it out. but it’s insufferable when going to hangout with someone. i miss my friends, my family, and my partner. it’s crazy to me that i’m dealing with all this at the young age of 18 but, i’m sure lots of people have it way worse. i just want to find a way out, any possible way. but i keep pushing myself deeper and deeper that when i finally find a way, it will no longer exist.
- Date posted
- 23w
I want to go do something I enjoy so badly but I feel like I don’t deserve it. I’m full of guilt, shame, and anxiety. I wish I felt okay like I did a few days ago. I feel so awful right now. I hate OCD. I HATE pocd. I hate all of it. I wish this was easier. Sometimes I have the thought that I wish I was the things my OCD makes me afraid I am out of desperation to stop the anxiety, but then that thought makes me panic bc I don’t actually mean that or want that I just want the anxiety and urgency in the compulsions to stop. I’m so tired
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- Date posted
- 20w
some days I wake up with so much dread and guilt. It makes it so hard to keep going. I open my eyes and I’m hit with a wave of nausea and terror. I feel ashamed of my compulsions and my OCD. I feel like a monster for my checking compulsions. For momentarily sexualizing things that shouldn’t be sexualized out of anxiety. I’m ashamed of a lot that I give into because of anxiety. Confessing things that are meaningless to my boyfriend. I feel so awful and unworthy of existing and of love. I feel hopeless I don’t want to keep pushing, the more I push the more meta my OCD becomes and the more guilt I feel for this mental illness. The more confusing it becomes to do ERP. If compulsions are a choice, they feel like life or death and it’s driving me insane, I beat myself up so badly over them I’m scared of compulsions, I’m scared of thoughts, I’m scared to be awake, I’m even scared of sleeping because my intrusions and compulsions haunt me there too. I spend my dreams trying to explain or justify my OCD and compulsions to people. I’m exhausted, I want this to stop so badly. My severe OCD isn’t feeling any less severe and it’s been months. I don’t want to keep questioning my every move but I’m so hyperaware of everything I do. I’m so tired. Some days I don’t even have tears to cry with. I’m just so full of despair and shame
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