I think I’m afraid to get better but I don’t know why because I hate ocd

Same. Like I get afraid when I start feeling better because I’m afraid that I don’t have OCD, and I’m just faking it. Shits hard sending u love

Why is it how empty it will be

I have felt this. I lived with untreated OCD for 37 years because I didn't know I had it. When I first started treatment, I felt completely hopeless. I had done years of therapy and never made any progress. My mind was NEVER quiet. My thoughts were either racing a million miles an hour and there was endless chatter. ERP was crazy hard. But the benefits are SO worth it. It has been life changing for me.

I’m currently looking for treatment and I’m scared to I’m scared to get better cause if it comes back I’ll have to deal wit finding ways to do things again to work wit the new ocd if I just keep it I’ll always be strong in it and I’m scared of going threw the process of getting admitted them touching all my stuff which I don’t like and not letting me use qtips which is apart of my getting ready everyday ritual I get dressed in a certain order then put on deodorant qtips put my hair up then clean my face wit my face pads then I’m done so just not being able to use qtips in the hospital is traumatizeing just to get in the hospital and then not even be able to help my ocd.