It’s the holiday season and there’s magic on the air; just believe, because no matter how dark things get inside you, around you or both; on the other side of all that darkness, can be/is the twinkling of Christmas lights on a magical winters night ✨🎄✨ #IfYouJustBelieve #HarmOCD #PureOCD #PerfectionismOCD

Valentine’s Day is a day to celebrate love, however if you are living with Relationship OCD (ROCD) this can be a very triggering day. Relationship OCD is essentially, the fear of being in the wrong relationship, not truly loving your partner, or not being loved by your partner. This makes you doubt the true nature of your relationship and makes you believe that your entire relationship is based on lies. It can make you feel like a bad person and not worthy of love. ROCD will make you believe that you need to leave the relationship just to find some peace. When we think about ROCD we often think that this only applies to romantic relationships, however ROCD can impact friendships and family relationships as well. ROCD will attack whatever relationship is most important to you. As an ERP therapist some of the most common obsessions that I have seen include “Is my partner ‘The One’”? “Maybe I am meant to be with someone else”. “What if my partner cheats on me or worse I cheat on him/her”? “I find X attractive. Should I break up with my partner and be with X”? “Do I even love my partner? What if they don’t love me?” This list could go on and on. The basis of all of these intrusive thoughts is fear and doubt. The compulsions associated with ROCD are vast. The most common include checking feelings to make sure you really love your partner, avoidance behaviors, reassurance seeking behaviors both from your partner and from others and ruminating on the relationship in the hopes of figuring out if this is the “right” relationship for you. ROCD, as in most theses in OCD, wants 100% uncertainty that this relationship will work out with no conflict or compromise. The problem is this is unrealistic. All relationships will have some level of conflict and compromise in them. There is no “perfect relationship”. Most of us have grown up with fairy tales where one true love will come and sweep up off our feet. Life and relationships can be messy and complicated, but they are worth it and are a key aspect of what makes us human. The fact is ROCD makes you doubt everything and will take the joy, excitement and contentment out of the relationship. The good news is that treatment is available, and it is possible to have a long, happy, fulfilling relationship despite ROCD fears. It does take time, perseverance and patience. Treatment using Exposure Response Prevention has been proven to lessen intrusive thoughts. You will learn to manage your expectations of the relationships while leaning into your fears and learning to accept the uncomfortable feelings. By doing this, you can bring joy and contentment back into you life and your relationships. I'd love to hear about how ROCD is showing up for you. Share your experiences in the comments below or ask your questions about ROCD and I will respond to them.

I want to beat OCD because I have seen and felt the benefits of clearing my brain from unnecessary, pointless, thoughts. OCD is like 0 calorie food. It’s pointless. No nutrition or benefits come from my obsessions or compulsions. I don’t care to have answers to everything anymore. I catch myself just trying to stress myself out so that I have some worry to feed on. But like I said, it’s a 0 calorie food. I get nothing from it but wasted time and energy. My brain feels more spacious when I’m not consumed by OCD. I’m present. My personality has room to be herself without making space for bullshit. I tell myself now that worry is poison. I think Willie Nelson was the person I got that quote from? Anyways, that imagery of worries being poison for the mind has been transformative for me. I’m evolving. 💖 Thanks NOCD community.

As the Chief Clinical Officer at NOCD, I like to check in with our community when we enter a new season, especially knowing how OCD responds to change. The arrival of spring can bring many changes—longer days, increased activity, and breaks from school or work. These shifts from the pace of winter can be refreshing, but they can also affect our energy, emotions, and stress levels. As a result, OCD symptoms tend to ebb and flow during this season, just as they can during any time of change. I encourage you to pause and check in with yourself in these early days of spring. If you're noticing OCD feeling more intense, know that you're not alone. Instead of judging these feelings, try to focus on how you respond to them—because no matter how OCD is showing up, there are tools and support to help you through it. Here in the NOCD Community, you're surrounded by people who relate, who care, and who are rooting for you. I hope you'll lean on your support system and seek care if you're feeling stuck or overwhelmed. Therapy can be a powerful way to gain skills for navigating life's changes, and our team is always here when you're ready to take the next step. Have you noticed any changes in your OCD as we enter spring? How are you managing them?