OCDHaver
- Date posted
- 3y
Idontknowausername Idontknowaus...
- Date posted
- 3y
Pocd and moral ocd. HIGHKEY ruined my life. Effects every minute of everyday. Creeps into my nightmares. Hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours if rumination and hating myself and contemplating suicide and attempting suicide. Have my ocd and depression chant over and over to smash my head into the wall or floor. Wanting to scrape off my skin. Constantly confused. Losing my sense of being, my sense of life. Forgetting what the sun feels like. What seasons are like. What it feels like to be peacefully happy. I can’t catch a break even when I’m sleeping my mind is torturing me, confusing me. I feel broken, I feel gutted, I feel like a disgusting pile of mush and misery. I feel repulsive. I see myself in the mirror and feel disconnected and disgusted. ocd in general has ruined my sad life.
Goff5378Goff5378
- Date posted
- 3y
I feel every word of this. I had a panic attack on the ride home and wanted to crawl out of my skin. I have a minor ear infection and it's had me fucked up too because I'm dramatic. Either way I'm glad we are still here. Be kind to yourself.
OCDHaver OCDHaver
- Date posted
- 3y
I have experienced everything you have just described, I still am, just last night was the first time I have SERIOUSLY contemplated suicide and was wondering how I would do it, I felt as if my life was not worth anything, if you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here
chattachanachattachana
- Date posted
- 3y
Relationship OCD is fucking me up so much. I've only had toxic flings with other men and never had rocd with them. Now I have the most healthy, loving and beautiful boyfriend ever and I have urges to break up with him, cheat and runaway from him. It makes me feel like I don't deserve healthy relationships and I'm doomed to be unhappy in love.
OCDHaver OCDHaver
- Date posted
- 3y
Me as well, I’m bisexual and stared using Grindr a lot and exchanged a lot of photos with other men and regret a lot of it, it was gross doing that with strangers and men far older then me
Goff5378Goff5378
- Date posted
- 3y
I get sexually weird or incredibly gruesome images. It was hard for me because I grew up in the Bible belt. I didn't know how to interpret me being straight but having weird sexual intrusive thoughts at super inconvenient times. I still am trying to loosen the death grip that my thoughts have no roots in me just because they happen to be the noise my brain is emitting at that specific moment. I worked as a public defender, and some of the images/thoughts I get are vivid to the point of disgust. It's a fucked up mental illness, but it helps me so much to talk about it because I kept it all to myself for so long. It's also cathartic to know that others struggle similarly, and I'm not alone.
OCDHaver OCDHaver
- Date posted
- 3y
You’re definitely not alone, I struggle a lot with sexual intrusive thoughts and images
Goff5378Goff5378
- Date posted
- 3y
@OCDHaver It makes me avoid conversation and have heightened awareness of any perceived social anxiety by the unfortunate soul that happens to be talking to me when I imagine something really weird. I know I make a physical grimace at some of these images or have other physical almost involuntary reactions to the images. I don't want anything to do with them.
razberrie27razberrie27
- Date posted
- 3y
Not the most difficult or prevalent, but the most disturbing thoughts are absolutely the ones around pedophilia and beastiality. Always the what ifs. The worst was when I convinced myself to not have children because I thought I would touch them inappropriately. After a lot of working on my mental health, I realize just how irrational that thinking was.
OCDHaver OCDHaver
- Date posted
- 3y
I am seriously considering having children as well for the same reasons, I’ve decided that I’m not dating anytime in the next 5 years for fear of sexually assaulting someone, I would never want to hurt anyone and am scared that I will, I have never hurt anyone like that, but I’m terrified I might one day
MagzzzMagzzz
- Date posted
- 3y
POCD and Real Event OCD
OCDHaver OCDHaver
- Date posted
- 3y
These are my biggest themes as well combined with false memory OCD, it’s the absolute worst, it drives me insane and has me at my absolute lowest
MagzzzMagzzz
- Date posted
- 3y
@OCDHaver Same here unfortunately
morgie3711morgie3711
- Date posted
- 3y
Harm ocd is my worst one. It constantly tries to convince me that I am a violent person and want to do something harmful or asks me why I haven’t yet. It’s terrible, all my life I’ve focused on being a good person. I don’t understand where this is coming from and why it’s so believable. But I don’t wanna give into it ever
Anonymous_hmAnonymous_hm
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
POCD combined with false memory. It makes me feel like a monster!
ocdcycleocdcycle
- Date posted
- 3y
me too!!
Mr.ocdMr.ocd
- Date posted
- 3y
Sexual orientation ocd, but i feel like ive had rocd as well in the past now that i look back at how i coped with them.
OCDHaver OCDHaver
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m sorry you’re going through that, OCD is horrible
clf15clf15
- Date posted
- 3y
Gender Identity OCD. Just having everything about my identity shredded, doubting all of my wants in likes, feeling like a man in my head near constantly, worrying that it’s true but also worrying that I’m not worried and that I do want it. It’s really got me in it’s clutches right now
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andrea_sam730
- Date posted
- 25w
Self pleasure and intrusive thoughts :/
I’m sharing this bc I need advice or even support from anyone who can relate. If you can’t relate and don’t think you’ll say anything helpful or kind pls don’t comment anything… I’ve been struggling with somethings that’s making me question myself. There has been moments while self pleasuring when I get intrusive thoughts, in those moments it feels like I’m enjoying or even self pleasuring myself bc of the thought. Right after I immediately have an anxiety attack and my HEART drops bc it feels terrible I feel like a disgusting monster :( ppl have told me I haven’t done a bad bc of how intense my guilt and panic are but I keep thinking that MAYBE I made a horrible decision in the moment and the guilt is just realising that it’s just wrong this doesn’t make sense to me because I’ve always told myself that I would never act on this in 1 million years and I’ve been known that these things are wrong so I’m just like constantly questioning myself these feelings and exact same situation has happened two times already I even promised myself that I wouldn’t act on anything beforehand and yeah, I still felt like I did act on my thought during my alone time I’m genuinely convinced that I’m a horrible and it’s even got into the point where I don’t wanna be here anymore and I don’t even think this is my OCD :( tbh
Chels0212
- Date posted
- 23w
Intrusive thoughts
I struggle so bad with intrusive thoughts. They can be so bad that I'll cry because I KNOW that's not how I feel or want to do. (Too embarrassed to say what they're about) I'll constantly try to figure out why I have them, and constantly figure out what they mean, causing me to constantly circle around and around. I had to get on anxeity meds, which helped a little but the thoughts still happen. How do you help yourself with this? How do you know that you're just not some physcopath? 😅
summertime33
- Date posted
- 20w
Intrusive Thoughts
This is hard to admit, but I’ve been struggling with intrusive thoughts where the central theme is racism. I don’t use racial slurs but my brain worries that I have said something that hurts or offends someone and now I find myself analyzing every social interaction.
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