I just did a mentality change that is really helping me with my doubts. We all have doubts right (rocd and pure ocd)? So what If we use our doubts as motivations to become a better version of ourselves? Obviously not by listening to them or giving them importance, but watching them from a different point of view! I'm just venting, but I would love a your opinion on that!! I think this is a very very powerful mentality!! If you want to try with your doubts too, maby it can helps!! For examples! [TW] (thought->motivation) _ "maby I don't love him enough" -> "I want to heal to love him even more, let's see how!" _ "maby we are not right" -> "I would love to be right, what can I do to improve my relationship and becoming even more right" _ "maby he doesn't love me enough" -> "what can I do to make myself feel more loved (by him and by myself too), I want to do somethingthat turn him on again, that can embrace his and mine qualities!" _ "will I ever be able to feel emotions again?" -> "I want to feel emotions again. What can I do? I think therapy can help so let's start it!"

Looking back, my introverted nature and struggles to find belonging in high school may have set the stage for how OCD would later impact my relationships. I had my first relationship in high school, but OCD wasn’t a major factor then. It wasn’t until my longest relationship—six years from age 18 to 24—that OCD really took hold. The relationship itself wasn’t the issue; it was what happened after. When it ended, I became obsessed with confessing past mistakes, convinced I had to be completely transparent. Even when my partner was willing to work past them, I couldn’t let go of the intrusive thoughts, and that obsession landed me in the hospital. From there, my struggle with ROCD (Relationship OCD) fully emerged. For years, every time I tried to move forward in dating, doubts consumed me. I would start seeing someone and feel fine, but then the questions would creep in: Do I really like her? Do I find her attractive? Is she getting on my nerves? What if I’m with the wrong person? I’d break things off, thinking I was following my true feelings. But then I’d question: Was that really how I felt, or was it just OCD? I tried again and again, each time hoping I could “withstand it this time,” only to fall back into the same cycle. The back and forth hurt both me and the person I was with. By the time I realized it was ROCD, the damage had been done, and I still hadn’t built the tools to manage it. Now, at 28, I know I need to approach dating differently. I recently talked to someone from a dating app, and my OCD still showed up—questioning my every move, making me doubt my own decisions. I haven’t yet done ERP specifically for ROCD, but I know that’s my next step. Just like I’ve learned tools for managing my other OCD subtypes, I need a set of strategies for when intrusive doubts hit in relationships. My goal this year is to stop letting uncertainty control me—to learn how to sit with doubt instead of trying to “figure it out.” I want to break the cycle and be able to build something healthy without my OCD sabotaging it. I know I’m not alone in this, and I know healing is possible. I’m hopeful that working with a therapist will help me develop exposures and thought loops to practice. I don’t expect to eliminate doubt entirely—after all, doubt is a part of every relationship—but I want to reach a place where it doesn’t paralyze me. Where I can move forward without constantly questioning whether I should. And where I can be in a relationship without feeling like OCD is pulling the strings. I would appreciate hearing about your experiences with ROCD. Please share your thoughts or any questions in the comments below. I’d love to connect and offer my perspective. Thanks!

I feel like my Rocd has become more sophisticated. It’s made me feel as if my healthy loving boyfriend is this terrible person. Or I’ll be thinking to myself like “I love him”, and in middle thought I get “no you don’t”. It’s convinced me that our values and beliefs are just TOO different (we’ve only disagreed on one thing in our relationship, but we talk it out). It’s like my ocd is clinging on to every reason why I should break up, like I don’t want this anymore, even tho I do! It’s frustrating. And the idea of doing erp terrifies me. Because I’m afraid if I do erp statements, that I’ll agree with them. Can someone give insight

Hi all!! Its been a while since I've been in here and typically I come on here to give advice and encouragement which i still plan to do but i really need encouragement right now. I typically deal with so-ocd but right now its taking a back seat or just disappearing ( which I'm not complaining) but now my rocd is really coming in thick and heavy and Im overly anxious but i have had panic attacks to the thoughts and its just been heavily attack me on my feelings towards my bf. I love this man with my literal whole being and I want to marry him and I know he feels the same cause we have had discussions on marriage. But lately and idk if its because of my period starting (sorry tmi) and all the hormones but i can't feel my emotions all that well, and the thoughts are constantly telling me i don't love him, i don't want to talk to him which are all false me and him are long distance rn which is hard but we push through it. I really hate these thoughts and all it makes me want to do is scream and cry. Like i said not overly anxious but definitely just want to scream and cry and of course cause Im not overly anxious my ocd picks up on that says oh see your not anxious with that so it must be true. I'm just hot mess y'all:( But anyways word of encouragement keep pushing y'all all got this and Im proud of every single one of you!!