I’m trying so hard but this memory is killing me, how can something that feels so real be false. I feel so much guilt and shame, my house is trashed. My poor kids. I feel Like there no point in keeping things nice anymore, I’m just a fraud and my daughter remembers what I did and just won’t tell me. I want my life back.

OCD can feel as real as it can possibly get! If it didn't feel real, it wouldn't be a disorder. Please know you will absolutely get through this and things will absolutely get better. Please please don't give any value to OCD. You must be having a very hard time right now but you'll get through this, I promise. Don't let OCD win. Try not to do the compulsions. 💙 And remember you'll get your life back for sure. 💞 Don't give up. 💞 Also I highly encourage you to follow Ocdrecoveryuk on Instagram. The posts are so so helpful there. And also see videos of ocd recovery uk in youtube too. Unconditional self, life and other acceptance is very very important. 💞 Please if you can then call the national Suicide prevention hotline: 1-800-273-8355 Or text the national Suicide prevention textline: 741741 💞 Sending lots of love to you. ❤️ There's also a video of OCD and Anxiety that can help you. The video name is "how to remove guilt from OCD" There's also videos by OCD recovery UK about "chronic guilt and OCD." That can help you. 💞 Remember you're not alone. you'll get through this. 💞

also I'm sorry if I didn't give you any Reassurance, it's cause reassurance only makes OCD worse and I don't want to make your OCD worse. 💜

There's also a video of OCD and anxiety that I recommend you to watch. The video is "Rumination and OCD | how to stop!"

you’ll be okay, continue to do ERP, breathing exercises, and try to keep your house clean. it feels better to have a clean space to be in. i’m hoping you’re okay soon, everyone on this app gets exactly how you feel 🫂