Losing my faith in God has made this that much harder. I’m not talking about praying as a compulsion. But I used to have strong faith and that made any anxiety or issues I had that much easier because I could just give it to God. Lately I’ve had so many questions and am barely hanging on by a thread. I used to be a youth pastor and now I feel like there’s no hope. Then throw on my newly developed OCD now the problems are compounded and I just don’t even feel like getting out of bed anymore. I’m just so sad but have a wife and kid I need to be present for. I’ve never gone through anything like this in my life, why now when I’m needed most by my family?

Well said friend

Thank you!

Im sorry youre struggling

Yeah this is really tough to deal with. But I guess the whole faith thing has been a struggle for some time now, It’s only been exasperated by the OCD

I’ve been having throuble with faith for some time. Then I had an unrelated medical issue in May. I thought it was God trying to bring me back, because I was doing a lot of stuff I shouldn’t have. Was on adhd meds, anxiety meds, smoking weed and drinking. Then I got gastritis and lost 32 lbs. o was thinking it was Gods way of saving my life so I could be there for my son, because I basically had to stop everything. Then the ocd hit a few months later. I’ve been asking God for a sign, something to help me hold on. I’ve even been praying that he doesn’t let me go, but I’ve yet to have anything happen. It’s pretty traumatizing you go your whole life believing in something and then suddenly have it pulled out from under you. That in addition to the OCD I question why life is worth living. Don’t worry, I’m not actually suicidal, but I’ve thought about it. Previously I just loved my life, and now I just question what it’s all for

@Ocdislame Bro everything you’ve explained I’ve had similar experience. Bro my wife tried to commit suicide in September 2019, I found her body it was traumatizing, then I smoked weed i feb 2020 cause I was stressed and ended up confessing some of my sins to my wife and she confessed hers to me, that weed experience was bad for me that same night I started having harm thoughts towards my wife and it scared the shit out of me, then may 2020 I had a nightmare about stabbing my wife and that shit wrecked me and bam harm ocd was born with that night of the night I smoked weed. I know it’s hard my brother. I know God loves you brother even when we don’t feel it. Our feelings change so much it’s crazy that’s for sure lol. The trauma I faced brought on ocd. I know it’s scary, I questioned to why this happened is life worth it, I loved my life so much before all this shit. I told the lord I would give up everything to not have this. My wife reminded me it’s easy to have faith when everything goes our way and it’s through trials that faith is tested. I wasn’t raised in church came to Christ in my early 30s. I know you don’t wanna some run of the mill answer but I do know God loves us. I identify with you so much bro cling to his goodness. I remind myself how can I be an example to my son when life is only easy. Get into therapy erp specifically. It helps bro. Your brain is just wired different my man. If you wanna email me I’d be more than willing just let me know.

@Ocdislame I’m truly sorry that you have to deal with this illness. I wish there was more I could do besides offer words of encouragement and love.

Have you tried reaching to a pastor

Thank you. Yeah I had heard that before. I just hope this passes eventually

@Ocdislame It might it might not bro. Get into therapy man it will help you!

I’m thankful I have my wife and son. But the OCD along with issues with my faith also make things seem so pointless.

I’ve done that. Prayers never really seem to get answered. Not in a way that I know it is. Sure sometimes I’ll feel better, but so do most people