Losing my faith in God has made this that much harder. I’m not talking about praying as a compulsion. But I used to have strong faith and that made any anxiety or issues I had that much easier because I could just give it to God. Lately I’ve had so many questions and am barely hanging on by a thread. I used to be a youth pastor and now I feel like there’s no hope. Then throw on my newly developed OCD now the problems are compounded and I just don’t even feel like getting out of bed anymore. I’m just so sad but have a wife and kid I need to be present for. I’ve never gone through anything like this in my life, why now when I’m needed most by my family?

So I’m not sure how many/if any of you are Christians, but I’m assuming this can still make sense to some of you. This morning has been rough. I’m constantly thinking, “am I saved? Have I never been saved and I’m tricking myself into thinking I am? When I’m listening to Christian music am I doing for the right reasons? Is it too late for me?”. Things I know the truthful answers to but yet I still think these thoughts. I don’t understand why. Why do I constantly think about these “what if”’s? My heart always feels so heavy and I feel as if I need to talk to God right then and there to make it stop and go away. But then am I talking to the Lord for the wrong reasons? And the cycle repeats. Thankfully, day one of my therapy is tonight and I’m hoping to find at least a little clarity on this stuff. I’ve had OCD for 7 years and I don’t even know how it works. Any advice?

I get the constant wave of sadness that ocd has taken my life from me. I can't share my thoughts and they don't feel like mine. I have episodes where I think God must hate me or see some secret sin in me that I don't see, or else I really really am missing when the holy spirit is saying to me. I want to be free so so deeply and have a normal, independent and fruitful life but God is not answering me. Why do I have these thoughts? Are they spiritual or just my mind? If anyone with Religious ocd can help or share how they navigate a true relationship with Christ while having ocd, I would really appreciate it. For context, I've had dozens of people pray over me and I've literally screamed like a child for God to give the answer, I had faith-based ocd even before i understood the gospel or personally knew Jesus. I want to live with eternity in mind and be free from these things so so much. Thank you!

Do you think God can help me with ocd-Religious themes thoughts... the problem is they feel so real, which is a diagnostic of ocd, and are robbing me of any peace and a true, full loving relationship with Christ. I feel anxious/depressed 24/7 and have such bad intrusive thoughts I'm almost permanently frozen in bed. I feel disabled and behind in life (I'm turning 22 in a few months, currently a student) I trust in Christ alone, but I really don't understand have I am expected to live like this. I don't know what God's will is or if these thoughts are spiritual/ocd. I'm trying to the lose my mind. I know He has enough grace, but I am desperate and my mind is so ill. I am so afraid of sinning against Him or leaving Him. I am so scared of my thoughts I cant share them, I am trying to get better, trying to live a normal life but I am sweating through my clothes, dizzy, foggy, crying screaming, etc. I dont know why God would allow this when all my soul wants is to love and obey Him, and to make my will His very own. Please please help. I know we have to pick up our cross, but I also know Christ said that He came to set the captives free, I have been tormented beyond recognition since age 13, I believe (to some extent) that ocd can be spiritually related, if you would entertain that thought, or perhaps not? I need answers from God. I can barely behave like a human or have any normal conversation my mind is running a marathon every day. My dreams are slipping away and I want to be independent, more than anything I want to do what pleases the heart of God and to live with eternity set in mind. This thing is trying to consume me. I feel like a dropping weight to my church even though they have done nothing but patiently support me. I hate being mentally tormented. Pray for me!