Yep, it’s a sly compulsion. I think it’s OCD wanting you to test your reaction to staring at those places to get you confused and ruminating. Don’t be hard on yourself. It’s not your fault. Just accept that it happens from time to time with self compassion
This happens to me sometimes! I do it without realizing too. And I’ve done it for years even before my major OCD spike. Was it OCD before I even had a big OCD theme? My theme right now is sexual orientation ocd.
i thought i was alone😞 i’m struggling with this so bad. i hate even stepping out of my room anymore, this sucks so bad. do you also suffer from pocd?😞
I experience this too so much it’s horrifying and makes you doubt your own morality, you aren’t alone please reach out and get help when you can. Until then reach out to kids helpline if you can I’ve always found them really supportive
I feel like somebody has to say… What’s wrong with that? I mean, you wouldn’t be here if no one ever looked at anyone else’s privates. That’s how humans make humans: we have sex There’s nothing wrong with noticing people’s bodies. I mean, if by stare you mean uncontrollably GAWK in such a way that you make the other person uncomfortable… that’s a social problem; it’s just not very cool or attractive behavior, but it’s not a moral failing (unless it’s actually meant to make the other person uncomfortable or feel threatened). POCD and any other “sex non-consenting themed OCD” begins with a judgment, and it is a sound, reasonable judgment: this intrusive thought or what is implied by this thought is immoral. However, the source of the thought is not desire, but fear. This realization lowers the stakes, so we know we are not on trial, there is nothing broken about our souls. Now we are better postitioned to use ERP to decrease the compulsions and eventually, dramatically decrease or eliminate the Intrusive thoughts themselves. If we had any doubt about whether the thought was based on desire instead of fear, we will know it was based on fear once the Intrusive thoughts have decreased—meaning, an actual pedophile’s thoughts would not go away through ERP; only a POCD sufferer would see those thoughts eliminated via ERP. So this is how we handle intrusive thoughts about behavior that is truly immoral. But when the intrusive thought is not about something immoral, consider trying to accept that this may be a legitimate desire of yours, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Most people, especially most men, look at people’s privates for as long as it takes them to masturbate, anywhere from once a day to once a week. Usually younger men spend more time—maybe even many times a day! Don’t hate on yourself, if you can help it.
Thank you for normalizing that!
wait, i’m scared i don’t know if i read this wrong but if someone doesn’t get better from erp it makes you a real life pedo?😞 im panicking
i suffer from POCD
@Anonymous_234 No, it doesn’t mean that at all, I’m sorry it sounded that way. And I’m just some guy—don’t take my insight as any more valuable than your own. Have you done the exposures? This changed everything for me. Eventually I went to a city park and as kids played, running and squealing, I just read and ate, alone—I didn’t focus on the children except for a minute here and there, BUT, I didn’t avoid them either—I acknowledged their presence fully. I had all sorts of intrusive thoughts: images and even genital response, but I kept doing it, and for me, it worked pretty quick But to my amazement, within a few weeks of doing the exposures, it all just went away. I have had a night or two that felt like a relapse, but that’s maybe a half dozen times a year. I still ruminate and have some other compulsions, but the big ones that had me questioning if I’m a good person? those are resolved, and I know I’m good, and I know I’m not a pedophile Prior to that, my exposure was watching these adorable child development psych videos.
im panicking so bad
Hey I’m so sorry please reach out to kids helpline oaky they really help me, you aren’t alone in this compulsion
@Forest13 Whats the kids hotline?
@Anonymous Sorry this is based in Australia I’m not sure what it is there where you are there is a thing called kids helpline phone I think it’s for america
does this make me a monster?