- Date posted
- 3y
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
I know it's hard as hell but I think the only way to get over those thoughts is to discuss it with your therapist, and continue doing erp to get better I know how you feel I struggle A LOT with thoughts about bestiality and pedophilia
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you for the advice
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
@Anonym1l ur welcome i really hope it helps, remember ur braver than you know
- Date posted
- 3y
Hi! I don’t think any of this is out of the ordinary at all especially for us who have an OCD wired brain. I don’t want to downplay your fear at all but I interpret this to mean you were just exploring what was out there not seeking out something. It is also common for straight women to be aroused by images of other women in addition to those of men. When I was first beginning my recovery from OCD guilt was such a large part of my OCD cycle and I didn’t even know. I think for those of us with SOOCD, POCD and ROCD can feel such shame, not only from thoughts but also in trying to explain to others what we are going through. In my opinion, the shame and anxiety that you describe are really textbook OCD. One thing my therapist taught me about leaning into my fear (this is probably only something you should do in recovery with support) is to challenge your doubt. So let’s say your OCD says “you don’t even know your own sexuality”…you could challenge it by saying “you know what maybe I don’t” and then move on. I know it’s easier said than done but don’t try to figure out what these things mean. Everyday we try to answer the same question our OCD poses to us. Don’t do it. I think part of acknowledging your OCD can involve sharing it with someone who cares about you and wants the best for you. I told my mom probably 10 years ago when I first started to experience intrusive sexual thoughts. I was like “ mom, I don’t know what this is and I don’t like it”. I only found out it was OCD this past year, 2021, and being able to call my mom and talk about therapy or medication has been incredible. There are things I don’t tell her because I can’t handle it but I do tell my therapist. She is there solely to listen and help me and most of the time they’ve heard it all. If I were you I’d begin with baby steps, maybe text a therapist first and try to share through text or writing an email. All that said, this is from my own personal experience but I really resonate with your story. You are not a crazy creep and I would be surprised if you had some sexual hormonal disease lol!
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you so much for the advices! I really appreciate that you took your time to write this. I feel so much better now!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 21w
Why are things so real the first time they’re in my mind and then when I think about it later it’s easier for me to be like wtf?? I was watching a movie earlier and the young girl had developed more in the chest area than the last movie and I felt the desire to check her out so I did. Then later I let myself imagine her having sex and I liked it. But now looking back I’m like ew. The boys in the movie have also developed as the movie went on and I couldn’t help but think that in their real life they’ve probably woken up to boners and s*men and stuff. And looking back it’s just ugh. Idk if it’s sexual relevance but I genuinely let myself indulge in these thoughts and groinal responses and I remember thinking to myself I don’t want to be attracted to little kids and how do I stop myself (everyone has attractive qualities so in younger boys I see man like qualities). Idk I need help. I wouldn’t type this out if I truly believe I was messed up but I’m still scared
- Date posted
- 17w
Hey guys I'm 17 years old I had experience with OCD I looked trans pornography and femboy stuff I'm straight I didn't jerk off to it I was really only looking at it in the past I have but for some reason I just felt like looking at it and when I did I did experience arousal not only that while I had a boner I simultaneously was thinking of memories and bad actions I had in 4th grade with another boy I myself not a homosexual I was a kid I did something with another boy I regret it I had that thought in my head lingering there in my head but I noticed pre ejaculation and now I feel anxiety because now it feels like I was intrigued by the thought it feels like it is it was probably to the video visual stimulus but it's hard I didn't jerk off to it at all I was really just looking idk what to do it feels like I did experience it to the video but also my thoughts say to the thought idk what to do can someone shed light on this
- Students with OCD
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- False Memory OCD
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- POCD
- NOCD Therapy Alumni
- Date posted
- 14w
So I was never diagnosed with pocd but many ppl said that I have it and my therapist also said that I have ocd, I’ve recently been getting these thoughts and feelings of attraction towards kids, idk if it’s real attraction or not, but I worry that it’s true attraction because I don’t feel panic and anxiety towards those thoughts and feelings anymore, I used to feel that, but I also never felt shame or guilt for those thoughts and feelings. I also can’t tell if I want those thoughts and feelings or not. When I get those thoughts and feelings, I tell myself “I can’t be attracted to kids” and “being attracted to kids is bad” and “I wouldn’t like kids”. The main thing is I can tell if I am attracted to the kids or not, I feel like I want to know, but I also don’t know if I want to be attracted to kids or not, yet the attraction feeling feels so genuine, I can’t tell if it’s false or not, I try to compare my attraction towards a girl my age to the feelings I get when I see the kids. I’m also under the age of 16, and I’ve heard that people under the age of 16 are at risk of developing p#dophilia, I’m pretty sure I don’t want to become a pedo. But I can’t tell what I want anymore, I can’t tell if my feelings intrusive or not. Even though some people said that I have “textbook ocd” I still don’t believe it. These feelings and thoughts, I just don’t understand if I want and like them or not, idk if I WANT to like or want them. I also lied on 2 questions for the ocd diagnosis about liking the thoughts which I don’t know if I do or not, I said that I think I don’t when in reality I don’t know if I do or not. And the second question where I said I don’t feel aroused even though sometimes I do, idk why I get aroused for that stuff, idk if I want to be aroused or if I don’t want to be aroused. Can someone give me advice pls? ANT to like or want them. I also lied on 2 questions for the ocd diagnosis about liking the thoughts which I don’t know if I do or not, I said that I think I don’t when in reality I don’t know if I do or not. And the second question where I said I don’t feel aroused even though sometimes I do, idk why I get aroused for that stuff, idk if I want to be aroused or if I don’t want to be aroused. I also used to watch p#rn a lot, I was exposed to it at a young age cause I was a stupid ass kid once, I got addicted to it and watched it every day, when all of these feelings and thoughts started, I completely stopped watching p#rn which fixed that, but now I’m worried it was a sign of something bad because I heard that early porn exposure creates mental issues and stuff, so I don’t know if I have pocd or actual pedophilia anymore. I’m also currently tryin to get a relationship with a girl my age. Can someone give me advice on all of this pls? Idk what all of this means anymore :( (edited) I also keep getting thoughts of kids and I’m worried I’m attracted to a specific part of them, because most of the thoughts include that specific part of the kid. Im also attracted to that specific part on adults, but I’m worried that it’s a sign I’m a pedo because it manifests on the thoughts of kids
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