Thread
herdel25
15d ago

OCD definitely sucks mostly because is the disease of uncertainty. We get stuck on all the possible "what ifs" thinking that maybe that way we will feel safe and everything will be ok. And it doesn't work because that's not the real issue. The problem is our inability to feel safe in the face of uncertainty. Maybe we weren't equipped for handling uncertainty by being compassionate and kind with ourselves. Maybe we weren't made to feel safe. Whatever the reason we lack compassion for ourselves. Giving to others not so hard but to ourselves is such a struggle because we think we don't deserve it. Our thoughts have convinced us that we are bad, horrible, sick, and a bunch of other terrible adjectives when in reality we aren't any of that. The proof is in the discomfort we actually feel about those thoughts. At the end we aren't not our thoughts but they scream so hard that we think we have to pay attention to them, otherwise something terrible will happen. And you know what? It never does. But we live in the torment like it has happened. Again this thing really sucks. But there's hope. The fact is that we don't need to control our thoughts or define ourselves by them. What we actually need is so simple yet we struggle so hard to receive it. It's Love. That's all. Simple but yet we don't know how to give it to ourselves and we don't even believe we are worthy of it. But that's the biggest deception of all. We need it and we do deserve it. Not because of anything we do or don't do but just because we were made to be Loved and to Love others. So what's the challenge? I believe is to learn to radically accept ourselves right where we are and right how we are right now. This doesn't mean we accept the intrusive thoughts but that we aren't going to judge or condemn ourselves for them anymore. Is this going to stop the thoughts? Nope. But it will make us more resilient and more compassionate towards us. I have come to understand that this is a process and like every process it takes time and patience. It will be uncomfortable but so it's staying stuck in our thinking. What we can control it's our choice even when is not easy. Hope this helps someone who right now it's struggling like me.

teeth
15d ago
thank you. after having multiple partners over the years leave because of this illness, i sought treatment. now, in treatment, i am not recovering quickly enough, and my current partner is exhausted and frustrated with ocd. he will likely also leave. for so long, i have bullied myself for being sick. maybe you're right--maybe this doesnt make me unworthy of love.
herdel25
15d ago
Don't focus on how fast you are recovering. The good thing is that you are. Have this mindset: "it will take as long as it takes". Healing is not a destination it's a process of learning and growing. We all want to be Loved but right now what you and I need the most is to learn to Love ourselves by accepting ourselves in the midst of our struggles. And let me tell you something that brings me comfort in my hardest days; GOD Loves us unconditionally and without boundaries. Doesn't matter what we go through He Loves us. And He not only Loves He is LOVE. HE sees our struggles and battles and with compassion He is near. Sometimes we wish He will take this away but the fact is that is our choice what we focus and believe. We can either believe we are the lies OCD tells us or we can believe that we aren't not our thoughts but just the observer of them. And you know what? We are the latter. Just be kind to yourself. You don't need pressure. You don't need fixing. You just need TULA. TOTAL UNCONDITIONAL LOVE AND ACCEPTANCE. God bless.
NOCD Advocate - Mike
15d ago
Thank you for this sir.
zoed
15d ago
Thank you we all needed these Words. I struggle with severe Rocd and many days seem.so difficult...thank you