Maybe it's not OCD. Live with that uncertainty.

I'll start by saying, I have not been clinically diagnosed, as I do not have the funds to see therapists or psychiatrists in my current situation. Once I'm in a better spot, I very much intend to. That to say; after months and months of having issues with anxiety, specifically health related, my partner was the one that mentioned OCD. I did have some somewhat OCD related behaviors in my youth, though those likely could be explained by potentially undiagnosed ASD (as my mother is on the spectrum as well as a sibling, both diagnosed.) But I never considered OCD taking form in a health sense. I posted earlier about how I've had 4 days of pretty minimal anxiety and intrusive thoughts, and it has led me to doubt the OCD label I've been working at treating? I don't want to be the person that identifies themselves with a disorder they don't have, which is why I hesitate to self diagnose with OCD or ASD or anything else. At the same time, I've read that a lot of even clinically diagnosed people with OCD doubt their diagnosis. It makes me wonder if I will always have this doubt, and if that means it is worth it or not to get tested? I know that if I do, they can actually do ERP (whereas I've been self taught and self guided so far) so that would be worth it...

I’ve been getting stuck in my understanding of OCD lately. When I have intrusive thoughts, although I have OCD, I’m not supposed to label them as part of my condition? Instead I just say maybe/maybe not? It feels like it takes the wind out of my sails a bit in recovery? Like having cancer, but when I go to chemo, I’m supposed to say “maybe I have cancer, maybe I don’t.” Would anyone be able to speak to this and increase my insight and understanding? Thank you!

Why does ocd make you feel uncertain about everything. Even the things you knew were 100% certain before. Its so bizarre. All the subtypes like Rocd, Pocd, Hocd you should be 100% certain about these things but ocd makes you feel like you dont know. I sit here know saying in my head I DONT KNOW. its so hard and confusing. I just want to know who I am. Am I a good person like I thought I was and have been my whole life or am I someone else. I just dont know. Its awful