Someone help I'm really anxious So I'm getting PCR tested for covid and I'm terrified I have it because it means I exposed people. Last sunday I had a terrible headache but it disappeared the next day and I was sure it had other reasons because I have headaches really often (you can't get tested unless your symptoms have lasted more than 24 h here). But then my throat felt weird and I had to swallow and clear it all the time, probably making it worse. Apparently anxiety can make you feel as if something is stuck in your throat, and I've been so very stressed all week, and it started to get bad last sunday. It disappeared when I was focused on other things, like school that was in person, which means it was probably only OCD, which my parents convinced me off, and I ignored it like you're supposed to ignore OCD. I trusted my parents because were I to trust myself I'd barely leave my house ever and they have more common sense than my OCD brain, but I'm so scared that was a mistake But this morning in class my nose felt runny and I panicked. Probably because it was windy on the way there, it happens all the time. But it was too much and I went home and sort of had a panic attack I think. It disappeared and I feel fine now except my throat feels weird (doesn't hurt or ache and there's no cough but it feels stuffed, which is not even a symptom of corona. I've googled so so so much already). But now I'm getting tested but I won't have the result for days and I feel like I will be in a constant state of fear... I already had two negative rapid tests but that doesn't really help since they aren't very accurate... If I actually have covid I've been going to school with it for a week and grocery shopping and exposed so many people while playing it off as OCD... I'm not sure I will be able to forgive myself for that. Logically I know I'm trying to find some sort of balance between OCD and the pandemic because I need to keep living even with the fear of making others sick, but that doesn't excuse being irresponsible. Have I been irresponsible? My parents argued that I can't keep wasting tests because my OCD convinces me I'm sick all the time. There's logic in that but it feels like I'm not being careful enough. I'm following all restrictions and stuff but I can't really trust myself when it comes to symptoms and what I feel Don't really know how to deal with this :(

First of all, please try and not be too hard on yourself ! The pandemic is triggering to most people, with or without OCD, and the world is going through a big wave now. It's been two years, most people I know are exhausted and anxious. It's already very tricky to differentiate between covid, other common flu viruses, irritation due to the cold weather, allergies and anxiety due to this whole situation. When one adds OCD to the mix, it's normal to get overwhelmed. Even people without OCD are having trouble self evaluating and assessing how/what they feel. Just remember that now, with this new wave, how contagious it is, and the mild symptoms, we're all constantly potentially exposed/exposing people. And staying home would be avoidance (unless there are real medical indications). This is why people get tested many times and are getting more PCR than rapid tests due to the mutation. But remember that it also means that all people know this by now, so we all know the risks of going grocery Shopping or to class. Masks are really helpful. FFP2 and N95 have been proven to be really effective in both ways. You're not responsible for anything else, if you're respecting all measures and wearing your masks. Of course, OCD looks for certainty but there is none, and it this case, it's really for everyone. Don't be too hard on yourself and this anxious phase will pass. You're doing good. You're getting tested. Keep wearing masks and respecting the rules. This anxious wave will pass.

Oh I see. It really depends on the country, sorry I made assumptions. In my country, some people don't wear them anymore and don't respect the safety rules even when they have heavy symptoms. I would say these people are irresponsible, for instance. The important thing is: you're doing all you can! And during this wave, maybe you can avoid meeting people that have more risk factors around you (elderly family members, disabled or chronically ill) indoors. For the rest, respecting the rules is all you can do, it's all we all can do. And keep reminding yourself that situation is tricky for everyone, so don't be too hard on yourself and do what you can without falling into the trap of avoidance! I wish you lots of luck and you can keep me/us posted about your results

Do not apologize and it's a pleasure to have helped even a little :) This pandemic will end at some point but in the mean time, try and do the best you can and really don't be too hard on yourself :)