Can anyone please help me with my last post

Ugh I wonder why this app hates me. It happens to me all the time

I’m going to post a screenshot of the post that’s really bugging me now. If you find it maybe you can help me with that instead?

OK I’m frightened I’m changing and I’m really don’t want to. I was trying to comfort myself and then I act like my guys not and I shake my head in the negative but to me he’s always been a big deal and I don’t want him to go away And I keep shaking my head no but he is and I’m frightened I’m forcing it but I do love him and know he doesn’t know me but I’ve known him and loved him for years. So anyway I was trying to imagine this I don’t know if it’s even being flirty just being like joking around I guess with him and I imagine having a Rihanna song stuck in my head the one that goes “everyone’s looking at her but she’s looking at you “and I imagine flipping that around and singing about him and I’m scared he’s not and I don’t wanna get over him because he is a big deal I’m scared I haven’t said it in a long time but he is the most amazing guy I said even though I don’t I know him but not as much as I would like it’s hard to explain I don’t want to get into it. And I imagine joking around saying stop lying to me Rihanna and then I said there’s nothing more than I don’t know I don’t want to kiss Rihanna or women but I can’t stop saying there’s nothing more that my heart but it doesn’t want to do that. My heart does not want women there’s nothing more that my heart doesn’t want except I kept saying nothing my on my heart with a smile but why would I say there’s nothing more that my w wants with a smile when my Heart does not want women let alone her. And I can’t stop why would I smile if I’m straight? Escobar and I is the way I smile saying nothing more than for my heart does not want Rihanna does not want women My heart wants men not Rihanna my heart wants My guy. And I can’t stop doing this hand gesture I’m scared I’m changing I don’t wanna be I don’t wanna have a heart for women I’m not bisexual I want him/men broadly hymn specifically . I’m gonna can’t stop imagine putting my face up I don’t want my heart does not want women there’s nothing more than that I would not want not rather my heart doesn’t my hearts never been involved in this before and I keep saying that more often and I hate it! And I keep putting my hand out like I do I don’t want to do what guys do with women’s chest if you know what I mean. I don’t wanna squeeze them and I keep doing this hand gesture and how can I smile and I think that I don’t wanna squeeze boobs but I’m friend I am not up and down nothing more than my heart wants I don’t wanna kiss women I’ve never wanted that before so how can I smile and not how come I felt so open in my chest saying nothing more then what my heart wants my heart to never wanted women MY HEART HAS NEVEE WANTED WOMEN BEFOEE I said why does it start it’s not starting now but why did I smile and not I keep nodding deeply up-and-down my heart doesn’t wo women what’s going on . I’m scared this is proof I am and I don’t want to be but I don’t wanna live that life I’m not in denial. I’m scared my heart is not then I’m scared I’m smiling imagining looking at the naked statue differently and I don’t wanna look at her differ my I don’t want women