I've had a diagnosis of bad depression a couple weeks ago, which I didn't really agree with, because I more thought I was mild/moderate. But since that diagnosis alongside with Health and Rocd, I've started to obsess about depression... I'm googling, reddit-ing, confessing, asking everyone around me about the symptoms, the medication, the treatments and if it is curable. It hasn't left my mind. It made me feel like it was the end of the world, it feels like terminal cancer now, feels like I'll never recover, that I'll have horrible side effects from medication, can't drink or do drugs not to exacerbate it, can't wean off the meds if ever taken... Today it clicked for me, I have OCD about depression. I created an ocd about depression for myself? It was to me mild/moderate, never stopped me from doing anything really, but now that I'm obsessing over it and it's ruining me. I already knew I had health ocd (including fear of mental illness), but I never thought I would have one of my fears. And like a cycle my OCD about the depression is making the depression worse and so on. Has anyone ever had OCD about depression? Is our ocd brain just wired to worry about that kind of things? If so, do you guys have ERP exercises for that?

Yeah, OCD loves making a mountain out of a molehill. 🙄 Maybe this will help. Suicide OCD tends to pop upnout of nowhere. For example, I would go to take Advil, and I would have a thought I should take a whole handful. Or I would have a thought about being a burden and an embarrassment to my friends and family and that everyone would be better off if I wasn't around. These thoughts are very scary, but ultimately meaningless so you can ignore them. Suicidal ideation is a life threatening emergency and should be treated as such. These thoughts aren't scary and develop slowly over time. If you or someone you know is doing things like saying they wish they were dead, planning an attempt, giving away prized possessions or writing a note. You need to get them or yourself to the hospital or some form of inpatient treatment ASAP. Call 911 if you have to.

Hey there! My name is Tyler Devine and I am one of the advocates here at NOCD. I’m sorry to hear you are going through a rough patch. OCD is a very, very debilitating area in the realm of mental health and anxiety disorders. However, we know this. Saying how hard it is and continuing to dig a deeper hole is not how you win this daily battle. Learning to face OCD head on is something that comes with time and practice. I’m not sure where you are in your journey with OCD, but let me give you some background on myself: I’m 27 years old and have been dealing with ocd since I was young. About five years ago, I finally surrendered to the monster that is OCD (particularly SO-OCD, which if you’re unfamiliar with some of the main subtypes of ocd, is obsessive thoughts, feelings etc of a sexual relation). This is when I walked into my first therapy session with a specialist. Ever since then, I have never looked back. To this day, she is still someone I thank God for as she was a major part of a shift in my life. I know it’s tough but trust a vet like me who has put a lot of time into this stuff when I say you are far from alone. Some big things that helped me tame the beast and still do to this day are meditation, prayer, ERP (both staged and in real time), help from a specialist, faith, and medication (if necessary, as a supplement to your training). All these things combined with a positive attitude toward yourself and your OCD will lead you to victory! Keep helping others and keep utilizing the wonderful community of therapists and people who struggle with the same stuff like you and me. Before you know it, you’ll be a master of fear. Put in the work, get the results. Strength and Prayers, Tyler D

Yes! I have a long history of clinical depression.i am 45 and expressed my first depressive episode at 16. I once had a depressive episode that last 3 and a half years. I also have seasonal depression that can get really bad. I start struggling as soon as the days get short. December and January are always really tough years. Last year, my seasonal depression was pretty mild. This year, has been awful. I had a tough day yesterday.i also have a massive OCD spike around that time of the month. So I'm dealing with that right now too. Last night, I found myself thinking "What if this isn't just seasonal depression? What if it's the start of another depressive episide?episode? That's all it took to trigger a massive spiral. But I've already decided that if I'm not feeling significantly better by the end of February, I'm going to make a doctors appointment and discuss going on medication. Anti depressants don't work for me long term. I feel great for about two months, but then it stops working. Even upping the dose doesn't help. I also have suicide OCD, which doesn't help. But I also know there is a huge difference between being truly suicidal and having suicide OCD. You aren't alone.