hi guys, im new here and struggle with relationship ocd. i have been with my girlfriend for 5 years and this is the best relationship i have ever had. my ocd started about 6 months into our relationship when i went to visit her at university one night - i stayed the night and remember not being able to sleep from suddenly looking over at her and feeling nothing. i went outside to my car to call my mom because i didnt know what was happening. since then, i have been living in a cycle of reassurance seeking until i finally admitted i had a struggle and got help. i have not seen my therapist in months due to the cost, but i have been feeling anxious non-stop for the last couple of months. everything we do together, i spend more time proof reading every last detail to see if im still in love with her. it gets to the point where i just come to terms with the fact that im not into it anymore, but when i try to find the reasons why, there are none. she is my best friend and makes me happy, she gives me more then i could. ever ask for and i love making her happy, i just cant enjoy time with her without trying to find every reason why she might not be perfect. i compare her to other girls/relationships, check my feelings 24/7 and cant help myself. its lime i need to get to the bottom of this. i want to feel normal so badly and enjoy life with her but cannot without my stupid ocd brain getting in the way. it feels like im constantly living half in/half out with her (emotionally). does anyone have any advice or can relate to this? please reply. thanks for reading.