Ok, I have a question. How do you do ERP? It seems like that’s the most recommended way to deal with OCD, I have an idea of what it entails but it kinda scares me. I can’t afford an OCD therapist so this is something I’d have to do on my own, I just don’t know how.

It's very challenging. I'm doing it with a therapist and it's still incredibly hard so expect things to be difficult but it is supposed to work and many on here will testify to its success. When you have ocd, effectively your brain is misfiring on some topic. The actual thought or topic isn't really important but your brain is saying 'Danger! Danger!' even though there probably isn't any. In order to try to stop the brain from sending the danger signals we perform compulsions. Anything at all we're doing with the purpose of lowering the anxiety or put another way escaping the danger. So in a sense OCD is your brain trying to be helpful just on the wrong things. If you were being chased by a serial killer for example the danger signals would make sense! The problem here then is by reacting to the thoughts, performing compulsions, you are sort of saying 'thanks for warning me of that danger brain!' and so you get warned again and again and so on because you're telling your brain there is danger when there isn't. Now you probably know all of the above but it's important for ERP because then in ERP the point is to re-train your brain that the warning signals it is sending aren't necessary. You do this by putting yourself in to situations that feel dangerous (that's the exposures) and then not performing the things you do to lower the anxiety (that's the response prevention). Gradually over time, you get used to the thoughts and effectively bored of them. The anxiety comes down on its own and you've begun teaching your brain that it doesn't need to send the danger signals. The problem of course is it is really, really hard and your OCD brain will try really hard to alert you to the danger (it's trying to help remember!) so usually people expose gradually, starting with something that will make them somewhat anxious and focusing on that until it no longer causes anxiety and then moving up to another more challenging exposure. This is sometimes called the exposure heirarchy. A key thing to look out for here are more difficult to spot compulsions. Telling yourself 'this is just an exposure exercise, all is fine...' for example. The key is to resist all compulsions. Permanently. I haven't managed to achieve this yet but others on here have and seen good results.

Look into the self-compassion workbook for OCD by Kimberly Quinlan. If you can’t afford therapy I think this is a great way to walk through exercises on your own. I do it alongside my daily ERP and I love it. The Self-Compassion Workbook for OCD: Lean into Your Fear, Manage Difficult Emotions, and Focus On Recovery https://www.amazon.com/dp/168403776X/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_i_GHVPYR9BGMW2E5TSZTQM She also has a podcast “Your Anxiety Toolkit” which has some episodes that cover OCD. She provides great resources. There is also the Ali Greymond method where you track rumination time in addition to ERP. She has guidebooks as well but Quinlan’s book walks you through the process in a step by step manner.