- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
Hey! I struggle with something similar, I obsess over the fear of having a violent thought. I understand how horrible this can be. Think of it this way: people who ACTUALLY hurt others do not worry about it or feel fear about it. Your fear and obsessions are because to hurt anyone is not in your nature. Don’t try to shut the thoughts out; thoughts are only thoughts, and it does not reflect on you. It’s the opposite—you’re a good person. Here’s what has helped and is currently helping me: 1. Find a good therapist who can help with CBT/ERP/ACT. Talk therapy is not helpful for OCD 2. I highly recommend the book “Overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts” by Sally Winston and Martin Seif. This book is amazing. Please give it a chance. 3. Commit to ERP. If you feel scared, pinpoint where the fear is coming from and embrace that fear—it WILL start feeling less scary. Follow the app as if you’re training for a race—little by little every day. 4. My first step before this app was to monitor when I was seeking reassurance and give myself a goal of not seeking that outside reassurance and just living through the anxious feeling. I want you to know you are not alone. I want you to know that the fact you are on here means that you are a sweet and loving person who has OCD centered around something important to you. Please please know the only reason these thoughts come back is because you’re looking for them, hoping they don’t come back, which is how they DO come back. You are strong. Don’t give up.
- Date posted
- 6y
Yeah, we gotta dream of the thoughts not bothering us
- Date posted
- 6y
Oh friend:( First off, you should to sit down and breathe really deeply and really slowly. No one who wanted to hurt their loved ones would EVER stress about it this much before hand. The only reason that you have concluded that you’re gonna loose control and hurt someone you love is because of this equation- meaningless thought+extremely intense anxiety NONE of the above is cause for an action. You aren’t gonna do anything, and you don’t have to make sure that you aren’t gonna do anything either. The only person that you should be worried about, sadly, is yourself:( You are the one that deserves your vigilance and protection. I’m so sorry you are struggling with this, and I hope you can get some peace soon.
- Date posted
- 6y
I second everything @EmmaleighH said!!!❤️
- Date posted
- 6y
@EmilyRose The thing is it’s very tempting to say “yes I’d definitely want to shut them off”, but having occasional intrusive thoughts—as heinous or gruesome or disturbing as they may be—is completely normal. It’s why everyone you reach out to for reassurance says that yes, they have also experienced these random, weird thoughts. So I wouldn’t want a to shut them off entirely; I’d want a lever I could pull that would give me more CONFIDENCE to accept them for what they are, simply a part of being human, and not a reflection of something wrong with me.
- Date posted
- 6y
I think that’s a problem I’ve faced—I always wanted any thoughts I deemed bad to be gone forever, which set me up for failure when one inevitably pops up every now and again.
- Date posted
- 6y
You’re right Emmaleigh. Kayd, please ignore what I wrote.
- Date posted
- 6y
Don’t worry about it EmilyRose- we are ALL doing our best to navigate this. And it’s so damn tricky!
- Date posted
- 6y
Lol yeah sometimes (ok most times) I feel like ocd is just this little tricky jerk and I just want to be like “excuse me could you not for ONE SECOND”...but EmilyRose I completely know what you mean...believe me, the idea of just turning intrusive thoughts off completely used to be a total dream scenario to me...it’s just that it’s a dream that can’t be reached for anybody:/
- Date posted
- 6y
YES exactly. It’s changing you’re relationship with the thoughts that needs to happen. You cannot extinguish them- and get this- you don’t need to!! ACT and mindfulness will help so much with that.
- Date posted
- 6y
Thanks..yeah, OCD tricks me every day?
- Date posted
- 6y
Every second of every damn day??♀️
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
i haven’t been diagnosed with ocd but I have anxiety about harming other people/family members and it’s like urges and im scared I actually want to do it? I don’t think I’ve ever been violent as a kid (im 21 now) and the intrusive thoughts don’t go away so im just stuck all day everyday for the past few weeks just thinking and being scared about it and im having all these weird emotions like being irritated and angry I don’t want to hurt people I don’t think idk why my mind is making me think I do I’ve had intrusive thoughts before that I could brush away sure it took like a day or two but this one is different it doesn’t go away and leaves me with the worst fear imaginable and nothing I look up that should be giving me relief is giving me relief + I feel like im not in control of my body and that im just gonna lose it and act on these thoughts it’s just all on a loop and im not sure how im supposed to live the rest of my life when im in constant fear of my self
- Date posted
- 20w
Im sorry I have to come on here and ask for advice once again, but as some people on here know I have been suffering with ocd since I was around the age of ten, which only got worse as my beautiful children came along. or nearly 60 years Ive had every type of ocd there is, they always come down to the same thing , not wanting to ever harm the people I love more than anything. I had got on top of this and was managing well, I know I would never harm anyone I love ever and would never ever want to, no more of the hypothetical scenarios for reassurance either , but its like every time I try to stop the mental compulsions intrusive thoughts come back after a few days, As I was in between going to sleep and was half awake the horrible words ' hope ***** dies I cannot even write the name down who it was about. I do not know where it came from but I am constantly getting upset about this as it was about someone I would give up my life for. I think you can probably guess what I mean without me having to say it. I do read a lot of posts and ocd podcasts and once read someones story wher they used to wish bad things and I have never been able to stop worrying in case something like that happened to me . Could this be what it was that has caused it ? I think Ive also still held onto something from when I was a child when I used to worry that thinking something too much could make it happen,, Please, please give me some addvice and thank you,,, sorry for the long post.
- Date posted
- 20w
Hello, this is my second post, not too long ago i made my first, talking about a sudden come-back of my intrusive thoughts. This post will talk about another of my issues, mainly regarding ocd (obviously) and relationships. As i had said before, i had been feeling terrible and felt like i didnt deserve love, especially the love of the guy that i love. I would like to add that in prior moments we have promised eachother and he has reassured me he will never leave me, but today he was pretty much gone all day (long distance) and for the most part ive just been overthinking, all night, actually.. thinking that at any moment he will just randomly block me on everything and never talk to me again. Its now 4:03 AM, and i just feel so scared. Im scared of losing him, this is predominantly because in a past relationship things ended suddenly, my ex switched up after we had promises and everything and i am absolutely horrified of things ending the same way for me and him. I’ve been anxious, trying to take my mind off of it, but if i do, my mind tells me that if i look away, when i look back, i’ll miss it and he’ll have already blocked me. and tries to tie in earlier conversations i had throughout the day and somehow ties them back to now. (Like my bestfriend telling me she had some dream where i apologized to my friends for ‘leaving’) For the past few hours ive just been out of it. Im scared of being obsessive, Im scared of losing him, and whenever i check to see, my heart skips a beat because i thinks he’s gone. The thing is, I know this isnt the case, and I know there must be an explanation, but for some reason im still worried. and I know these thoughts arent a reflection of reality, but ive also had the idea that my thoughts can also affect what actually happens. I would also like to add that he lives in the US and is mexican, and with the increasing violent situation, my mind even starts to wander off and ask itself what if something happened to him? It makes it worse. because i can’t control it. and that makes me afraid. Im also worried about being a horrible partner, about everything failing and its all just making me feel worse. Yesterday morning I woke up feeling sort of out of it, and throughout the day i felt as if i were emotionless, which made me wonder what if i had lost emotions for him? this also happens to me sometimes. I, for some reason begin thinking like “you lost your love for him nothings gonna happen ever.” and my mind starts making up reasons why, or simply gives me this feeling of emptiness for that love, as if i have been detached from it. and then i overthink again “what if i actually dont love him but im just obsessed and thats all it is an obsession and none of it is real?” that last part, im feeling it right now. along with everything else. Im exhausted, Im tired, and i just want to be happy with him. Thank you to all those who choose to read this. thank you. ❤️ Edit: I would also like to add that ive been also dealing with the occasional regular intrusive thoughts. which dont form fully in my brain but i can still sort of, “feel” the intrusive thoughts uncomfortable themes.
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