- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m so sorry, I am in the complete same boat, I’ve found a private psychologist that specialises in erp and have about three months covered by Medicare (Australian thing) otherwise I couldn’t afford it at all, don’t know what I’m going to do after those three fucking months, I’m so sorry I don’t even know how to apologise for how fucked up this society is and how it is an illusion that anything works here, unless you are ritch off taking advantage of others, fuck capitalism I wish I had people who we could all just live in the middle of nowhere
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m on ssi for my ocd I get 500 something dollars a month and my Medicaid is suppose to help me pay for doctors visits and medications and the help I need for my disability but nowere will accept my insurance and these ppl think I can just go to a regular mental hospital and se regular doctors which I thought that’s wat I was suppose to do to get better but then learned regular doctors and hospitals don’t understand ocd I’ve seen doctors that have ocd listed on things they treat same wit hospitals and places treating anxiety disorders which is wat ocd is so I’ve always gone to places that list ocd and anxiety orders they all no the jist of ocd but don’t understand everything bout it and all the different kinds of ocd and wat comes wit ocd like anxiety anxiety attacks panick attacks agoraphobia guilt shame and staying up late being depressed and everything else they just have prescribed me an antidepressant and tlk therpay which I have now learned tlk therapy can make ocd worse and it’s just not a treatment for ocd but exposure and response therpay are and anxiety medications for an anxiety disorder sounds like they’d help alot to ocd is based off of fear and uncertainty like just constant panick give me a xanex so I can chill but I trusted them for 15 years every doctor and hospital was the same prescribed the same thing just 1 magic pill they think is a cure all the same tlk therpay 15 years and no change in my ocd cause none of them were ever treating me properly but they still got paid and here I am barely maid it threw school went to an alternative school never been able to work never finding help just always different from others liveing a different life than others and wat I portrayed pretending to be normal and being on ssi I atleast want to try to get help the proper care some anxiety meds so I can leave my house atleast I want to tlk to a doctor who understands my illness it’s just crazy that ocd help isn’t out there like other mental illnesses.
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m so sorry you have lost so many years, I hate this
- User type
- NOCD Alumni
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m so sorry for the years lost to this Illness. I am so happy you learned about ERP
- Date posted
- 3y
I'm so sad you have had this life. My son is 19 and I just feel lonely for him that he will always be alone. I worry about him every single day. He struggles with social anxiety, ocd with intrusive thoughts ( not disturbing thoughts thankfully a bad word repeating thought) and germ phobia. Wd have no family if something happens to us and I get so sad thinking about how I won't be around to help him.😢 Keep searching. Know your not alone. Maybe one day you can take your research and testimony and be able to help others who are struggling to. My heart goes out to you 😢🙏❤️
- Date posted
- 3y
Hey please make sure to ask your sons consent before commenting about him don’t know if you did just wanted to check :)
- Date posted
- 3y
I understand that I no some ppl get home care and like inpatient care in places like ppl who are more slower that can’t take care of themselves but live on there own I’d like to have that for myself to cause atleast I’d have care and help when I need it but you gotta have insurance cover it I don’t think ppl see ocd and everything that comes wit haveing ocd as dibilitating and like me I can do alot of things they just take me longer cause of rituals I no the way to do things normal but I have ocd and can’t I’m not stupid I can leave my house and be round ppl but I have agoraphobia and social anxiety and just can’t but still it’s hard liveing like that I won’t leave my house to go grocery shopping till I’m starveing if I had help from a nurse to come help that’d be amazing especially when my ocd at it’s worst like it’s been lately if I can get help get better I can do more for myself which would make me feel better and be less depressed it’s so aggravating wanting to do all these things but just not being able to like I just want to put on my clothes like a normal person I want to put on deodorant normal and not wash my hands all the time I want to do stuff that I use to do I want to go to the store and not have to check wat brand it is to see if my ocd doesn’t like it but there’s gotta be help out there for your son like I’m home care getting help for ocd is so hard though I hope ppl can see it as dibilitating as it is so we can get more help.
- Date posted
- 3y
Good idea but my son literally has no clue and if I asked him for his consent he would not even understand what I am talking about even after I thoroughly explain it to him. It's heartbreaking. He does not even have a phone he refused to ever have one. Every appointment we do have I encourage him if he wants me to not be included and he always wants me there. His is not a typical 19 year old. He has signed the HIPPA forms bit I don't think he even understands much about that even after thoroughly explained. I never mention his name and I never post anything or any pics of my kids ever. Thanks for pointing this out though ❤️🤗
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
Hello, I unknowingly have lived with ROCD or OCD (not sure what one. I’m new to this). It has ruined so many amazing romantic and platonic relationships and I am so sad that just now I am finding out what the hell is wrong with me. Maybe life would be different if I have known. My OCD and anxiety is at an all time high (ATH) due to some horrible events that have happened in the recent months. I am at the point where paranoia has taken over my life now. I had my first panic attack a few weeks ago where I fainted. My anxiety attacks are so extreme I go thought cognitive distortion that has lasted days. My girlfriend of 3 years is my emotional guardian and she no long has the energy to be that and honestly it’s not her responsibility to be that. She is bi and wanted to have an open relationship and for someone who has OCD this has not been good for me. She also was assaulted in my own home by a good friend of ours when I was out of town but it’s not a clear situation because it sounded consensual at first. I just left my very high paying job. I am financially secure but the job was emotionally abusive and looking back made my OCD worse. I am taking some time off to get my head right…but now, all I have to do during the day is live in my OCD. I’m very happy I finally figured out why I act the way I do but I don’t know if I can get better quick enough to save my relationship. I have never been so worried about myself (M 28 years old). I am a confident young professional and never thought I would be writing on a page like this. Anyway…I hope it gets better.
- Date posted
- 14w
First off - I’m sorry, I post here a lot. My thoughts are going to be scattered because I have the adhd/ocd/executive dysfunction wombo combo. Im so embarrassed I am THIS neurodivergent. I swear my brain couldn’t pick one struggle and settle with it. I’m not making these diagnoses quirky personality traits by any means, in fact, in this post im venting about how exhausting and embarassed I am living with a brain like this on the daily. I need to hear someone’s advice please. I love hearing everyone’s advice on posts because it’s so useful, and brings me back down to reality. Everyone on here gives advice so tastefully in a way where it doesn’t feed into the self reassurance compulsion, but it’s also been thorough and constructive enough where it’s reminded me to ground myself in a healthy way. I love seeing others helping others, it soothes me. This community has been so kind, and I’m so happy I found it. I wish I could ask more, but I have so many questions I think it’d drive everyone here crazy lol. I am doing erp therapy now, and it’s been teaching me so many amazing techniques. I’ve been making progress. However, I sometimes have my moments of vunerablity. I’ve been experiencing this especially now more than ever because I am going through a breakup. He did it through text after nearly 9 months together. I’d do anything for him and love him through anything, and he broke my heart when I least expected it. I’d make his bed for him multiple times, but I haven’t done that for myself in years. I’d sit with him for hours to watch and do anything he likes, but he’d never do the same and I’d never do the same for me. I’m also at fault because I was too scared to speak up so I let a lot of disrespect slide. Why did my ocd do that? Why does ocd make me people please even when I don’t want to? Why does OCD make me care so much about things that will never effect me (like wanting validation from a random person on the street and hoping they’ll think I’m pretty enough to look at), but then when it comes to my future or positive wellbeing (like focusing on college/doing well in classes/personal hygiene/health), forces me to not care/neglect myself and those needs? I don’t understand it. Ocd makes me think everything’s a setup or a trap. I can never believe that I am fine right where I want to be. Why am I so hard on myself? Why do I even think this much? I care and feel so deeply but it becomes unhealthy so fast because ocd makes me fixate and I stay there for a while. For some reason I let this breakup define my self worth. I let it topple into the ocd fear that I will never make it in life - that I won’t be successful, I’ll never get the career I want, the love I want, or the life I want. My OCD’s version of “logic” isn’t even logical. Yes, I understand how the breakup means feelings of low self worth which will then topple into feeling bad about other things. But why has my brain been wired to think this way? Why does it seem so easy for everyone else to function normally with life but not me? Honestly this is the first time in my life where I’m dedicated to focusing on myself and learning more about myself instead of others in my life and it’s a very odd and bizarre feeling. I’m excited of course, but I’m also scared. My ocd makes me ruminate like “what if I will never make the most of this life I’ve been given”, “what if I truly have no worth and the most I will ever be in other people’s lives is a background character”, “why do I care if I’m a background character or not? I should feel guilty and ignorant for assuming everyone will automatically like me”, “are people lying to me when they call me pretty, smart or kind?”, “I need to look and sound perfect in both pictures, videos and in real life. I will never be satisfied for accepting who I am now”, and a bunch of other annoying questions. But sometimes it’s like I just can’t take the reality for what it is but at the same time, but I also acknowledge that I know this is ocd talking. This is so, so difficult. Do I make any sense with what I’m saying? Can anyone help?
- Date posted
- 10w
I’ve recently been struggling a lot with OCD. I have had OCD for a long time I just didn’t realize it until more recently. About seven months ago I developed panic attacks one day randomly at work. I thought I was having a heart attack and went to the hospital where they told me it was just a panic attack and I assumed I would snap out and be better within a few days. However it didn’t. Here’s where it gets scary, I was staying at my then boyfriends house while dealing with blurry vision, anxiety attacks everyday, and more (unsure of what was going on). But at some point I saw my bfs (pew pew 🔫) on his table and it sent me into an anxiety attack after sudden thoughts that I was going to hurt myself with it. I begged him to put it away when I’m not looking so I didn’t know where he put it. He did. These thoughts lasted for about four days but began to go away. (I thought that was it and I would be back to normal). Unfortunately though I ended up moving back in with my family when we couldn’t get my panic attacks under control in time for me to get back to work and pay bills. However, coming home brought up a lot of trauma from when I was kid. My anxiety got worse but I didn’t have those thoughts again. About two and half months ago though, I got sick and went to the hospital where they gave me steroid pills and a steroid shot but sent me into some kind of psychiatric event. Ever since then though, I have been suffering from harm OCD, I have had moments of intense anger that I usually have to completely walk away and go on my own because of how intense they are, and it feels like it’s getting worse. Today I felt fine until about and hour and half ago where I started to dwell on the fact that my suicidal thought was influenced by my OCD and at the moment my OCD is at the worst it’s been. This caused me to get suddenly really depressed and I started crying thinking about how I can’t handle this. I then saw a post talking about how suicide rates are high for people with this form of OCD and it made me question if I am mentally strong enough to pull through this. I fear that at times I’m getting worse. I have good days but I have a lot of bad days. Unfortunately this sent me into such a bad panic attack I went over to my nanas crying about how I can’t deal with this. I took a 0.25 mg Xanax which helped calm down the panic attack portion of it but my brain is still uncomfortably active. I guess I just need hope. I’m so saddened by this. It’s like my life took a total 360 in 10 months and got even worse since the steroid shot. Idk what to do about it. I can’t stop the spiral. I talk to two different therapist weekly and start more next week, making it 5 times a week. I feel no improvements…
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