- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m in bed all day to I recently moved into an amazing apartment brand new carpet cheap and everything’s included even have free cable I can’t even describe wat I felt when I seen this place it was so perfect and I had been struggling wit my ocd but things were getting better and I was gonna work on washing my own hair and doing more stuff and it was so easy to move our stuff in cause everything was clean I even put stuff under the bathroom sink usually I think there dirty and don’t put anything we’d use under them but I just came in here and was able to just put stuff up but we were here 7 days and pest control came and sprayed majority of the carpet wit bug spray cause we seen a couple fleas and fleas don’t bother me so it wasn’t a big deal but I panicked my bf rented a carpet shampooer and I shampooed the carpets till 3 in the morning I didn’t eat he gave me a few bites of pizza as I was shampooing I was panicking I cleaned the bottom of the walls and the outlets the bottoms of doors and under the door which was hard I think that things spread so even though I shampooed them we had already been wlk on them and onto the floors so I had to wipe the floors to and he sprayed near the bottom of our bed so if any over spray got on the bed it’s on the foot end of our bed and sheets we didn’t have hardly any of our stuff here cause we had only been here 7 days and we didn’t no wat it would look like and if I would need to clean so we didn’t bring much and put old place is 30 minutes away but nothings moved since that happens I can’t put nothing on the carpet if I wlk on the carpet and then onto the floor I feel like there’s foot prints of contaminants on the floor if we set something on the floor then the counters now it’s on the counters if I plug my hair dryer into the plug it’ll be on the plug part of the hair dryer if I set the hair dryer back on the counter it’ll be on the counter like it just spreads to me and I was already struggling wit my ocd and contamination ocd I keep all my clothes in zippered clothes bags even my dirty clothes i by qtips in the plastic containers so when I bring them home from the store I can rinse them off under the sink and place them on my shelf were my hygiene products go I do the same wit my deodorant and face pads I use to clean my face those are the 3 things I use when I do my dressing rituals and they can’t touch eachother I have to wash my hands when I touch my deodorant and face pads all my stuff gets packed seperatly nothing can touch I’ve been struggling the past 6 years like this cause I bombed my old apartment not noing it would trigger my ocd and I slowly started feeling like everything was contaminated cause we bombed and now I’m still dealing wit the consequences of bombing and now since this guy sprayed bug spray everywere it’s just really hard to deal wit so I’m just panicky all the time I constantly feel like everytime I do anything the contamination shit goes threw my head like wat did this touch and its just been really hard so I stay in bed more I had plans to get better here in this clean nice apartment now the carpet is just causeing me issues so I just stay in bed and I have agoraphobia I’m scared to go outside I don’t want to go outside I don’t want to do anything I still try to do stuff cause I no I need to but I need more help and I’m trying to find someone that accepts my insurance.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 19w
I know this isn’t directly ocd related but I feel like it’s got to be a shared experience between a lot of us. When I ask in fitness groups no one seems to have anything to offer. Anywhooo I started celexa in October I believe? In January I started going hard in the gym and tracking my macros to a tee. In the past I have done this and got really fit and muscular. This time around the progress has been going at a snails pace. I almost feel like progress has even haulted and hasn’t even been that long. Anyway I really think I have a good amount of knowledge on this stuff and mostly want to know if anyone has had this experience after taking celexa? I can’t think of another factor that it could be. I would almost like to get off of it because of it. I hate to sound vain but with the extra weight I feel depressed and uncomfortable. I’m putting in soooo much work and seeing the results but like I said it’s going ridiculously slow. Any advice for this kind of thing? Thank you :)
- Date posted
- 19w
I have hold back my tears . I’m trying so hard to play it off. I can’t think about it anything without on the verge of falling apart . I have no self control over my mind . I’m scared. Is this a psychosis . I have barely eaten in days . My stomach is growling but I have no appetite. Idk what’s going on . Normally if I have a rough week I can fight it but I can’t fight it this time. My biggest fear is loosing my bf. I’m spending the day with him and all I can do it think about what’s gonna happen when I leave .
- Date posted
- 15w
Does anyone feel like they are stuck in place? I haven’t done anything besides lay in bed on my phone (if I’m not at work) for almost a year now. I have the desire to go out and be a part of the world, but I feel like my body is glued to my bed. I can’t motivate myself to get out of pajamas to go anywhere, and the entire time I’m out (even just at the store) I just want to be home in bed. I mainly just DoorDash food now, when I can convince myself to eat. I’m tired.
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