- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
OCD targets everything that you fear most or want least. By you saying that you’d rather think about ending it all then being gay or bisexual, it’s clear to me that you have a lot of heavy internalized (negative) feelings towards being anything but a heterosexual, and your OCD is taking advantage of that. It’s the same as other types of OCD trying to convince someone that they might hurt someone they love when that’s the last thing they would ever want to do. Just know that you are in control of your life, no matter what your OCD tells you. If you feel this strongly, there is clearly nothing deep down that you’re having to admit to yourself. Life is very much worth living, you can get through this.
- Date posted
- 3y
OCD will twist and turn you perception of everything. Use the anxiety as your indicator that's it's OCD. As hard as it is you need to stop analysing, which is a compulsion and sit with the discomfort.
- Date posted
- 3y
OCD haunts your mind - believe me I've been here before in my life - but even my OCD won't let me acknowledge that. Seek counselling - look at doing ERP and maybe consider medication. I'm on fluoxotine which can give you a rough ride at first but has helped me in the past. Believe me - the mind is capable of creating this pure evil!
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m a girl and sometimes I’d also catch myself fantasize about girls rather boys a lot. So to test myself, when I went to school I looked at pretty girls to see how I feel and then attractive guys. I realized that girls are really attractive but i wasn’t sexually attracted to them, while I’ve had many crushes on guys. I think I’m not used to the idea of the male body if that makes sense. I could never imagine myself doing it with a guy because their stuff seams weird to me but when I imagine it with a girl it just seems more familiar? But I found out that just because I find girls attractive doesn’t mean I’m sexually attracted to them if they makes sense. So have you had any ACTUAL crushes on a girl? Like irl? Did your heart beat faster when around them? Or is it only in your head? Lmk if you have any other questions
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
as the title says. i am trying, i really am but i cant help but think that i have been gay this whole time. it feels like i can never be happy again unless i come out. i cant do it anymore. everyday is hard. there are not easy days. i just want to love my partner and i cant. i look at him and i get this wave of anxiety and guilt. why can i just be me again? i miss the days there this was just a past thing. i feel alone and i feel stuck like this forever. my heart hurts all the time. i am trying to sit with uncertainty but i cant because it feels certain and that i know i am gay but i dont want to be. its really really sad. i hate my life and i need it to end. bye.
- Date posted
- 21w
I feel awful that I keep coming on here whenever I’m down bad but oh my gosh OCD is the most painful shit that I have EVER experienced in my life and I have a physical chronic illness…. I hate to say it but I hate living right now it’s too painful… im crying as I type to the point where my stomach is hurting, I have pretty severe ocd I do have generalized anxiety and idk if that is connected with ocd but because of that I have most of the subtypes REAL EVENT OCD,POCD,ZOCD,ROCD,SOCD HARM OCD, you name it and I got it!!! a lot of also why I have have those theme is trauma growing up and involving those things^ as of right now i’m 25 and a women with the most loving boyfriend in the entire world before my ocd hit me I NEVER questioned my love and care and attraction with the love of my life I always knew I was going to marry and be with this person the rest of my life! Now with ocd it confuses me soooo much and now I think I’m gay and didn’t realize or indenial and listen I get it “don’t look for reassurance!” “It’s not the thing ocd is attacking that is the problem ocd is the actual problem!” Here’s the thing with that if I’m in a relationship and I’m gay that would mean I would have to leave that said relationship and to say that “oh yeah that stuff happens and you’ll move on” is absolutely devastating to me this is THE LOVE OF MY LIFE and your telling me that iv been lying to myself this whole time or that I didn’t realize?!?!? And that sexuality can change (even though some say it can’t google says otherwise and some people have said it can’t idek anymore) and all this other BULLSHIT I can’t take it WHY?!?! why does this have to happen why can’t I just be with my love the rest of my life?!? and yes before anyone says anything I have been attracted to girls more so when I was younger watching lesbian porn liking the body’s and fantazing them sexually it stopped when I got older but I still don’t get disgusted with women who are pretty it just makes me uncomfortable because I’m with the love of my life and before I remember talking to my partner and discussing certain childhood things I experienced and we discussed that we both could be a little bi and for certain I’m (demi sexual so I don’t even really care about looks) and I truly didn’t care!! NOW I do care even with being bi because again I don’t like thinking about anyone else but my partner but I do also know my parents are homophobic and I do think about if I am gay they wouldn’t be okay with that and I also dont want to deal with that so now I sound like in indenial right?!???? I didn’t even care about labels before my ocd it just didn’t matter but now it’s effected my sex life and it’s hard for me to enjoy sex with being so confused I’m so confused I googled everything can you still have sexual fantasies with same gender but still be straight? Can you fantasize about same gender or imagine marrying them all of it !!! And non of that disgusts me it just makes me uncomfortable AGIAN only bc I just love the partner I’m with right now!!! I’m so fucking confused do I have to leave my partner and accept that I’m gay is that going to happen in the future if I get better with ocd and find out it’s been true all along?!???
- Date posted
- 16w
Sorry long post. Anyone feel like now they’re just in extreme denial. Like when I was little I noticed guys more than girls in movies and was more drawn to them. I remember changing my mindset to switch that. 98%of my life has been straight until recently. I felt drawn to some guys but never thought of it sexually. Always had girl crushes dreams and porn. Now I watch porn and I feel like straight takes longer and then I go and watch gay porn and feel nothing until I tell myself it’s two attractive dudes and love is love and imagine physical sensations and then it hits like suddenly. Like I have to convince myself it’s alright. Then when I try again I can do all that but feel nothing and then straight porn works. Idk if it’s just getting a fix or the first time works with anything or what but it’s confusing. On top of that I’ve felt girl relationships including my wife maybe miss something and a guy maybe matches that feeling that but then I feel like I’d be missing something without a girl or my wife. Idk I’ve had some rough times in life with male figures in my life but idk. I feel like I have to convince myself more and more that I’m straight even more than the first time I dealt with this. Can someone relate? Please
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