- Username
- ranchdoritos88
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Porn is literally the worst way POSSIBLE to make some sort of ‘conclusion’ about your sexuality. (Not that there is any way at all- don’t go looking for it!!) Gay people watch straight porn, straight people watch gay porn, women get turned on by lesbian porn, and some people on both sides of the spectrum never watch porn at all. Arousal after watching sexual things cannot decide what you want or prefer in your own life. You’re just watching sexual people do sexual things!
Honestly it doesn't matter - just enjoy your marriage and be yourself, maybe you can explore this new sexual side with your husband :) consider seeing a relationship therapist to help talk about and communicate what your experiencing :)
When the thought comes, try to say “maybe I am bi” and then do what you were doing before the intrusive thought. Obsessing over a question almost never leads you closer to the answer. If you want the truth, let your obsessive thoughts pass and you might find clarity.
(I don’t mean to be reassuring here- just want you to know!!)
You are watching straight porn and you said you love men, to non ocd that would be enough. Being ocd I know its not. Personally I had to become ok with the possibility of being homosexual to enable me to find my straight self again, like would it really matter if I was gay? Its not the end of the world is it and I dont know why I built it up so much, and when I started thinking like that, I settled back into my hetro life, I strongly back gay rights now though and support the gay community. Thats what helped me anyway, personally I think if you stop building it up the being bi would be a bad thing (it wouldnt, and you could still be with a man) you will stop obsessing about it and like me, you will prob find something else to obsess about!
Thanks everyone. @Leah25. I agree. That's how I see it too. We are sexual beings and sexual content can turn us on. It doesn't define what we desire. @wiseblood. Thanks for the advice. I noticed that is true. When I finally stop obsessing then the answers become clear. @morgz82. That's what I need to do. Just accept the possibility and move on. It isn't the end of the world if I am bi.
Ok I have a question for y’all. After you have a good moment with a guy, like when you think about him and want to be with him and it feels good, does anyone get the intrusive thought “what if I’m romantically attracted to men but sexually attracted to women?” Because that just came up for me and it is not fun and very worrying. Because I have been aroused by lesbian porn (I did this before my HOCD intrusive thoughts started) and now I’m worried because I was aroused by that I can only be sexually attracted to women ?
So this is for people with HOCD. I used to struggle with it really bad. But it faded away. Every now and then it pops up. Is it possible to have slight bi tendacies and still be straight? I'm a 31 yr old married woman. I love men more than anything. I consider myself straight but I think women are beautiful and I do get turned on by straight porn, but I tend to watch the woman more than the man. Yet, I don't have a desire to be with a woman in any way to the best of my knowledge. Does this make me bi?
just need a place to write, if u read through thanks i appreciate it. my whole life i’ve been a very open minded girl. i started watching porn at a young age as it was shown to me by my friend. i watched all kinds including lesbian porn. it did turn me on ofc and i always found women to have beautiful bodies & they are attractive . they also have turned me on before. however my hearts always belonged to men. and that’s who i truly desire to be with and love and have sex with etc. however i do fantasize about women sometimes & honestly if my boyfriend wanted to have a threesome w another girl i would probably go for it since i am open minded and a very sexual person. always ready to explore new things i haven’t before. however even w that i still don’t think of myself as bisexual or lesbian. like my brain keeps telling me i am but i just don’t think so. the idea of not being in a relationship w a man and trading it to be w a woman makes me upset if that makes sense. like it’s just idk.. and i sometimes feel confused bc i am not disgusted entirely at the idea of being w a woman. i don’t desire it like i desire men. if i happen to think of it sure it might turn me on but i have no desire to go out in search for women. it’s just not for me. idk . reply w ur thoughts if u want i’d appreciate it
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