- Date posted
- 6y ago
- Date posted
- 6y ago
then you have ocd. the difference between a p*dophile that feels bad and someone with pocd is that the p*dophile is well aware he's attracted to kids he's not denying it or doubting whether or not he is. the fact that its always in the back of your head is because its an OBSESSION and even if it wasnt in the back of your head anymore it's because you are healing.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
It isn't constantly in the back of my head it is when ever I am not busy it will be all i can contemplate it also happens a lot when I am busy
- Date posted
- 6y ago
literally everyone with sexual intrusive thoughts has the groinal. the groinal is fucked up i know but its totally natural and very common. I had the groinal yesterday and the day before. now i dont cuz im just resting on my bed not paying mind to anything
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Another reason I thought I might be in denial is because every so often I would just give up and be like "maybe I am one then" and feel really depressed but then i would just think then realise oh I'm not tho then the cycle returns
- Date posted
- 6y ago
I totally relate! It feels weird accepting but it also feels weird denying. WTF
- Date posted
- 6y ago
it feels weird denying it because thats the ocd being like "YOU THINK YOU CAN DENY IT?? WHAT ABOUT THAT TIME YOU *insert false memory or false positive situation here" and ur just like uhhHHhhh i mean u kinda got me there. but in reality - you need to be extremely aware of the proof you have that youre not a p*dophile and you dont need to keep repeating it to yourself you just have to stop giving the thoughts a reaction. I know its fucked up accepting uncertainty because i sure as hell dont want to. if someone calls me a p*dophile i'll beat their ass but its the reality on how we're supposed to deal with these things.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
I struggle with a different ocd theme, but I agree, all themes should be treated equally. I just wonder if the day will come in which I can laugh this off. Right now my thoughts and fear are beating me
- Date posted
- 6y ago
it will dont worry. ocd is managable. you can manage it to such a point where u feel like u fully overcame it.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
it'll get better for you dude. it'll get better for all of us.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
I used to worry I was going to kill someone when I was younger and kept getting mental images which sucked I dont know if that was OCD tho cuz it was ages ago all I remember is I couldn't get them out of my head and I would spend hours crying
- Date posted
- 6y ago
tell me why
- Date posted
- 6y ago
I dont know it is just always in the back of my head I constantly worry I am in denial or something and If I dont really have ocd
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Yes thank you very much
- Date posted
- 6y ago
And the reason I worry is because I had a groinal response when I look at a kid (this only started happening when I started to worry)
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Yes
- Date posted
- 6y ago
literally i do the same. like ive had times where i would try to come to terms with it and be like "well if its gonna make me feel better maybe i really am a p*dophile" and then theres gonna be like a disingenuous feeling and like an immediate voice in my mind thats like "YOURE NOT YOU MORON SHUT UP" and im just gonna sit there like WELL WHAT THE FUCK AM I THEN UGH. ive just firmly accepted that im not and never was a p*dophile and no matter how much my ocd wants me to be one - im not - im sorry i like dudes my age and thats that on that. its always been like this and it always will be like this.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
like if it feels weird accepting in but it also feels weird denying it that doesnt mean youre in the middle - it means that youre not that kind of person and you just have ocd.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Yes
- Date posted
- 6y ago
I know I am not a pedofile
- Date posted
- 6y ago
I just had a bad dream that started it all
- Date posted
- 6y ago
in my experience i cant fantasize about sexually explicit scenes with kids involved because it makes me nauseous and suggestive scenes with kids make me uncomfortable so thats enough to solidify it for me that im not a p*do. like even if i imagine those kids as cartoon characters it still feels really off-putting so i just stopped worrying about it mostly (not fully i still have times where i'll immediately start feeling like shit and intrusive thoughts and triggers dont help) like to me it feels like im not telling my ocd that OH IM NOT WHAT U MAKE ME THINK I AM BASED ON THIS EVIDENCE and instead i just let my ocd talk as i have like a secret inner truth to keep me calm. idk if this will work for you but i hope you know youre not alone and i definitely believe that you arent one. I dont mean to be reassuring because that kinda defeats the purpose but ive seen people with WAYYYY more brutal pocd symptoms that i genuinely cant figure out the reality of it. you'll be fine.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Thanks I tried the thoughts to see if I liked them and they didnt make me feel sick but i felt no arousal and I didnt get and erection or anything like that they just wernt enjoyable they made me upset
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Ever since I have been worrying I stopped finding pedo jokes as funny some are still funny but not all
- Date posted
- 6y ago
also h56 im gay and i tried thinking about two lesbians having sex - and i felt the same - it didnt make me feel sick but i felt no arousal and i just didnt see the point in thinking about it. Thats how i know what not being attracted to something means. the reason i get nauseous due to p*do thoughts is not because im histerically in denial its just very disgusting to me like its something ive been afraid and disgusted by my whole life.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
i dont find any p*do joke funny quite frankly anything p*do related triggers me a lot except me talking about it here which doesnt make me feel anything because im just sharing info
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Yes
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Cuz I'm still at school the sense of humor is quite dry
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Hope so
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Ask yourself if you had ocd before these thoughts started popping up. If the answer is yes then you're definitely not. You're definitely not anyway. You would not over think it if you were. It's ocd knowing that the worst possible thing you think you could be is a pedo. Even if thoughts were to turn you on, with ocd, it likes to make you convinced. It does anything to fuck with your head and make you doubt yourself. I read something on here saying a therapist told a lady you can come twice from an intrusive thought. Doesn't mean you'd be happy acting out on the thought. Doesn't mean you sit around in parks seeking out little children. Brains are powerful things and mental illness always wants to make you feel like shit. Have you ever laughed at an inappropriate time? I've laughed being told someone has died. It's because we get panicky and think it's the worst possible thing we can do in that situation. Doesn't mean we'd go around killing people and it doesn't mean we actually find people dying funny.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 11w ago
Please read this. I’ve had ocd pretty much a lot of my life but never knew what it was until my senior year of highschool. I’m 21 with 2 kids and i believe i’ve had pocd a little bit before my daughter was born (which was 8 months ago). It made me start looking at all kids differently and i hate it. But it really started triggering me about 3 months ago. I’ve been thinking if i’d intentionally touched or harmed my kids the wrong way, or any kids for that matter. This started giving me false memories (or at least hope they are). I’ve been having panic attacks, yelling at myself, punching walls, praying, and even thoughts of ending my own life. I grew up in a severe toxic household throughout my childhood and teenage life. I’ve never wished that on my kids since i became a dad. I wanna give them the life i never got. I look back my photos of my children and i feel like i’m a complete fraud of a dad. I cannot look at my kids or be around them a lot of times. I can’t hold my daughter right. I can’t change their diaper when they need it. Even my son came and was hugging on me the other night while i was watching tv and i acted like a stranger to him. I can very little do this stuff sometimes because it’s either i get relief or i push my thoughts as far back as i can. I get scared if i did something to not just my kids, but any other kids in the past. I have such a a great life and such a beautiful family. It was hard and stressful at first being young with a family but i couldn’t be more thankful at all for them. I’m just so lost and stressed right now that i just don’t know what to do anymore
- Date posted
- 4w ago
So I’m really struggling to believe that anyone will want to be in a relationship with me and still love me when they find out about my pocd and intrusive thoughts. I am holding a belief no one can love me with this condition and they will be repulsed by me when they find out. I just don’t know how to shake that feeling and be brave enough to try and share with anyone I’m dating.
- Date posted
- 11d ago
i’m terrified to get a diagnosis. What if it’s not actually OCD??? I made a list of reasons why i think so and then i think what if im lying and i actually don’t do this stuff and am just dramatic and i just want to have OCD so then my thoughts are justified?? I have struggled in the past year with Pocd & Rocd and then also some bits of thinking im constantly in danger or being watched? I’m scared.
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