Had some serious relapse this weekend and feel so embarrassed. Idk what to do and no matter how much I try to do ERP I feel like I’m always doing it wrong. I want to die or hide. I feel like I’m nothing but a burden to people.

Relapses are a part of the recovery process. Recovery is not a direct line there's many ups and downs. Be gentle with yourself. You can restart every time there is a setback. Sometimes good information can be gained from those moments. Are you in treatment or doing self directed ERP?

I actually had a relapse this weekend too :/ it freaking sucks but please know I’m here and so many others are too. Whenever your feeling this way don’t hesitate to post because you deserve all the love and comments you give other people. You are not a burden. I feel the same way today but I’m telling you, you make this world a lot better by existing and even though I don’t know you, I know 10000% that’s true. Don’t ever doubt that

It's not just you! Many people do not understand the agonizing struggle that goes on inside of our brains all because we are trying to protect others and ourselves. People can't see it, they don't understand why we can't just get over it with a simple fix. I've had someone tell me it sounds like I want bad things to happen all because my OCD kept finding the .0001% possibility that something bad could happen, which obviously was completely contrary to what I was trying to accomplish. You are not alone or hopeless. You have OCD and there are people out there that understand. Are you seeing a counselor? Finding a counselor that understands the way the OCD mind works is a huge relief and offers a lot of encouragement and safe space to fight fears.

You are worth so much more than that. It’s hard, but I know you can do it!!

Hey I also relapsed today and since yesterday. It's awful because it's a topic I thought I had already solved and made peace with. But I guess with OCD there is no such thing

@Lids wow your situation is so similar to mine. My mom told me she feels like I’m way too sensitive and use the OCD as a way not to hear what I don’t want to. You’re not a hopeful case though, I promise. Even though it’s tough right now, she has to understand this isn’t something you can control and as much as we can fake being happy, you deserve to feel comfortable to feel how your feeling and not have to put on a face for family. It’ll get better for sure and today may just be a harder day than the rest but it doesn’t mean you are any less strong or incapable of controlling your OCD because you are in control always and I’m so proud of you

You are very welcome! You have have have to find a counselor that specializes in OCD. Many therapists even say they can treat it and they absolutely do not have the skill set to treat it. OCD will not get better just by talking about our feelings or talking about our childhoods. It needs exposure therapy and ACT/mindfulness to be treated effectively.

You’re so kind. I hate to even post things like this but I’ve gotten lower than low this week.

All of your comments are so so encouraging! Thankyou so much! But I feel like I’m just destroying everything. My mom told me she would not feel sorry for me today. It felt so awful. I wasn’t even asking her to. I just didn’t know if I could go to my sisters and fake being happy. idk. I just don’t know what to do. So I guess I feel like it’s not even most OCD. I feel like I’m just a hopeless case.

This is so kind of you! Thankyou for everything you said. I do see a counselor but she’s never heard of pure o and does not do ERP therapy. I feel like, she makes me feel better but I’m not getting any better.

@doubts123

Yes! Omg! I feel that!