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Username: rg17

Date posted: 2y ago

grieving time lost to OCD

I consider myself recovered from OCD. i still have intrusive thoughts but they no longer upset me. some days i really dont even remeber if i had any thoughts. I am so thankful to be better because it was SO bad at one point. However lately i have been grieving the 2.5 years of my life that i lost to constant intrusive thoughts and compulsions. It makes me so sad that i wasted so much time stuck in my own mind. does anyone else ever feel this way?

Username: Lms526Lms526

Date posted: 2y ago

Yes. I started experiencing symptoms of OCD when I was 8. I was diagnosed August 2021 at age 45. I had such a limited understanding of what OCD. It never occurred to me because all I knew was that OCD was liking things neat and organized and washing your hands a lot. I didn't have either. I also had no idea that what I was experiencing wasn't normal. I thought everyone struggled the way I did. It was only after listening to a podcast where the guest was someone with OCD and realized I could relate. I have completed treatment and now am in recovery. But it makes me so sad that I lost so much time I can never get back.

Username: yun444gyun444g

Date posted: 2y ago

So sorry to hear your story with OCD—I’m so glad you finally diagnosed though and have started your recovery journey. Just out of curiosity, do you remember the podcast with the OCD speaker?

Username: Lms526Lms526

Date posted: 2y ago

@yun444g Yes. Ironically it is not a mental health podcast. It's actually a Christian podcast. The host is Amber Cullum. I don't remember the episode number. But it was late July early August 2021. I also recommend OCD Stories. It's sponsored by NOCD. I don't care for the host. But the content is awesome. He interviews OCD experts and therapists as well as regular people with OCD.

Username: yun444gyun444g

Date posted: 2y ago

@Lms526 Hey thank you so much for replying! I will be sure to check those out—especially since you said you don’t care for the host, I’m now especially intrigued 😂

Username: Stacy QuickStacy Quick

User type: Therapist

Date posted: 2y ago

This is very common with those who have suffered with OCD. It's normal to grieve what you lost out on and what OCD did in your life. And at the same time, it is important to move forward- you get to create new memories and do things that you couldn't before. And that is something OCD cannot take from you. https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/how-therapy-helped-me-gain-back-all-that-ocd-had-tried-to-take

Username: Brittany232Brittany232

Date posted: 2y ago

Just now starting my healing journey hoping I can be speaking the same words as you soon!

Username: rg17rg17

Date posted: 2y ago

hang in there. OCD came out of nowhere for me and hit me like a ton of bricks and was relentless. it was so much work to get better, but i am so thankful i did. you can too

Username: NicaNica

Date posted: 2y ago

Just 2.5 years? Hey, that’s better than me at 6 years lost to OCD 🤪🤣 But you can’t fix or change the past, so you live your life to the fullest now.

Username: rg17rg17

Date posted: 2y ago

i mean i have had it for 9 years . but it got horrible after the birth of my daughter and thats the 2.5 years i mean....totally consumed with it

Username: NicaNica

Date posted: 2y ago

@rg17 Okay, OCD presented at 3 years old for me and kept getting worse. But that doesn’t mean anything to me personally since it’s in the past.

Username: rg17rg17

Date posted: 2y ago

@Nica so sorry you have dealt with it for so long

Username: wormsnakewormsnake

Date posted: 2y ago

not recovered yet but sometimes the grief of how much of myself and my life i’ve lost to all these thoughts and everything i could do before without compulsions getting in the way hits so hard. i’ve never seen this discussed before, so i’m thankful i’m not alone in this. it’s hard to let go of all the time lost, but now i’m trying to dedicate a double amount of time working to get better and live life. we deserve so much better.

Username: rg17rg17

Date posted: 2y ago

sending you love. its so hard

Username: wormsnakewormsnake

Date posted: 2y ago

@rg17 it is, but we can get through it :)

Username: BeverlyBeverly

Date posted: 2y ago

All the time. Especially with the amount of school I fell behind on because of it. Honestly, it just makes me disappointed in myself, that I was just too stuck up in my mind, that I could’ve been doing something with myself.

Username: cIumsy

Date posted: 5y ago

anyone else had ocd from a very young age? I’m talking like, I remember obsessions from when I was 6. and my family remembers my symptoms from even earlier. I didn’t get help until I was 15 because my family isn’t big on mental health. anyway, it frustrates me that I genuinely don’t know what it’s like to live without ocd. Sometimes I hear/see people talk about how they just wish things could back to how they were ‘before,’ or that imagining what their life was like before onset helps motivate them in recovery. But I don’t have anything like that. in fact, it’s almost scary to think about recovering completely because I don’t know anything else? it depresses me

Username: Becca1996

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y ago

Feel like you’ve ruined your life?

Anyone feel like you have ruined your life through giving into ocd compulsions? Or the choices you made in life that led to ocd symptoms getting sparked in the first place? I know healing is very possible, but right now i am remembering so many important moments in my life that have been “robbed” by ocd… :( I know this may continue to happen. The intrusive thoughts. The numb emotions. The constant checking to see if I’m in the present moment, which is exactly what takes me from the present moment. I wish I could go back in time and make different choices so my ocd didn’t flair up and rob important moments in my life that I had dreamed of for so long. Feeling bitter. Have you been where I am right now?

Username: toomuch

Date posted: 1y ago

Time and OCD

Do you ever get depressed over how long you’ve been dealing with OCD? I’ve been dealing with it for over two years now. I mourn what my life could have been like if that one thought hadn’t popped into my mind. Makes you feel like life is going to be like this forever. In those moments, what makes you have hope or a feeling that things are gonna get better?

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grieving time lost to OCD

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