Hey, just looking for some none-OCD advice, as at the moment I donāt really have anyone to talk to. Iām gonna try and keep it short, so I donāt bore you!
So, Iām from England, and Iām 16. At 16 in the UK, you go from high school to 6th form, where you spend two years doing something called your āA levelsā, and then you go to university at 18, like all countries. Iāve been in college for 8 months now, but Iād say 65-70% of my time has been spent online - so Iāve only had a relatively small amount of time to make true friends. I had solid friends throughout high school, and I say I tilt quite a lot towards being an extravert. Ever since coming to 6th form, a lot of the people who I was friends with, went to a different school, and some of the people who were acquaintances I barely see now, because the school is so large. Basically, since coming to college I only have 2 true friends, and one of those has basically separated herself from me (sheās a bit of a bitch, but thatās another story - weāve basically been best friends since we were 4 but she routinely ditches me)
Iāve found that no one ever messages me anymore. Iāve got plans to go to the city with me and 3 other girls next Sunday - but I organised it. They were all excited, but Iāve only been invited out once by one of my other friends. I just feel like no one likes me, and that Iām repulsive to people - I know itās irrational, but the fear that Iām just unlikeable terrifies me, as I want nothing more than a big group of friends and thatās not what I have at the minute. Iām desperate for someone to be like āhey, Ellie do you wanna come and sit with usā, but they donāt. And Iām usually just sat with one of my close friends, who I love. Sheās popular, and people like her more than me but sheās self-admittedly introverted and Iām not. Ugh, this is long now.
But does anyone have any advice? Iāve made a lot of acquaintances, but they all have their own friendship groups from high school - but I donāt because a lot of my friends went to a different school.
Iām miserable because of this at the moment, and I feel worthless.