Anyone else here afraid demons are real and maybe you can make deals with them or negotiate with them. but im saying this because i keep on saying the wrong thing out loud. and something similar keeps happening. and this makes me scared cuz then when i say something to correct the fear, i say something wrong again.

I woke up disassociating really bad ,I was super tired and if you read my prev post I've been having problems w depersonalization after a bad thc trip the other night. Im so so so scared I just said a slur or whispered it to myself because I cant properly remember things rn. I remember getting the thought and im scared i whispered it to myself and I cant tell if it happened or not bc waking up things feel rly blurry . It feels really real. I would never want to say such a word and im scared i did bc I was so out of it. I dont remember if i just had the thought or acted on it

Why is my mind saying I should say my thoughts out loud and that it will be ok, I don't want to because it goes against my beliefs and it freaks me out because my mind is like you've done this and this an other bad things this can't hurt you, saying it will give you peace and it just randomly started yesterday and idk what to do. It's like I have no will power to want to stop it's like my mind wants me to say it and idk what to do.

guys im so scared right now and i know my ocd is making it worse. i keep reading things online about the antichrist and whatever and im so so so scared. i keep reading things and i feel so scared like im choosing a wrong side or something. but i know i love God and Jesus. im so worried im wrong and i have no idea how to overcome this one :( sorry if this scares anyone or anything but any help would be very appreciated