Struggling with OCD and intrusive taboo sexual thoughts?

I have struggled with pedophilia ocd for the last 15 years. I suffered in silence for all that time, never telling a soul. I have been going through ERP therapy for almost a year now and things have gotten so much better. If you had told me a year ago that I would not only be posting on a forum, but actually typing "the P word" out for the world to see, I never would have believed you. I know how scary it is. I know what it feels like. I came so close to suicide so many times. You are not alone.

You’re not alone! I’ve been struggling with intrusive thoughts during sex that I have such a hard time accepting, which I know makes them even worse. I’m so embarrassed about them and even nervous to talk about it in therapy. I think taking the approach of self-compassion is what you need to begin with here, because feeling the judgements about yourself / your thoughts only brings more distress.

I get taboo intrusive thoughts while being intimate with my bf and it feels terrible, but usually I can understand what my mind is trying to do. I think if you have sexual obsessions you dislike of COURSE your mind is going to try to conjure them up and make you uncomfortable while doing something sexual! I usually realize the pattern of what my brain is trying to do and can say yeah I know what’s trying to happen here, not gonna let this bother me!

That used to be a huge struggle of mine, but it subsided, I used to work in the school system and OCD seems to attack what you value most and I valued the children and their safety and their wellbeing, but I felt I couldn't even touch them out of fear I'd be somehow molesting them...even just a pat on the shoulder or a high five...it made me feel like I'd never be able to have my own children

I get sexual intrusive thoughts with groinals daily. It doesn't that it's mostly reinforced by the pornography in the past. That's all that goes through my head. I would like one day where I'm not thinking of sex at all and just focused on what I need to be focused on.

I’ve been struggling with something like this— would you be comfortable being more specific?

What is self comparison?

i struggle with this as well!