Fears related to real-event OCD

I have dealt with OCD for many, many years. However, last month I read about real-event OCD, and my eyes were opened. I never made the connection with my worry of a real event to OCD. That was life-changing. This real-event OCD has tortured me for too long. It is a nightmare. I now see the need for therapy. I am scared. What if my real event really is that bad? Will my therapist turn me in? Will I go to jail? Will everyone hate me? Am I remembering it correctly? Yet, I have had all the signs of real-event OCD: the ruminating, constantly replaying the event to make sure I have all the details right, googling about it, researching, all or nothing thinking, feeling constant anxiety/guilt, seeking reassurance, a desire to confess, etc. Fear has held me back from seeking counseling. I’ve shared this event with a few very close people and they’ve all blown it off as something minor that happened long ago. Then I worry: what if I didn’t tell them exactly right? What if they are just telling me that because they care about me? Even writing this causes me anxiety/paranoia. Will someone track me down? Will this be used against me? I HATE OCD… especially this version. Yet, this forum has given me hope. Ok, I’m done rambling.

Cesiah Herna...

Date posted: 3y

It is truly brave from you to share a part of your story with OCD. You, maybe without noticing, expose positively yourself, and asked for help. You should be proud of it. OCD therapists are extremely prepared in this area, and will not reject you just because of the content of your OCD subtype. You are a person who has OCD, you are not your thoughts. Here at NOCD you will find the help you are searching for, especially in the therapy area. There is a list of professionals that I am sure they are willing to help you reach a recovery stage in your life with some ERP therapy. Even if you are scared of doing so, do it. You will not regret seeking out for help. Also, before that, you can join a support group as the one called "New to NOCD" so you can see how does it work and motivate yourself. There is also an option in which you can book a free 15 minute phone call, and there you can explain yourself freely, and see what they can do for you. Do not give up on yourself, OCD is treatable, you can do it!

ksmforever

Date posted: 3y

I have it too. And every question you asked I have also asked. It’s OCD! I hope you can find the freedom to let go.

Hope413

Date posted: 3y

Thank you. Until recently I had no idea other people struggled with this. I don’t feel so alone anymore. Thank you for sharing.

boxcarrac3r

Date posted: 3y

Feel the exact same way. Real event here. You are not alone. Stay strong. I remember when I learned it was OCD it was a life changer. I thought I was just slowly losing my mind and I was fucked up.

abbyvaph

Date posted: 3y

I have had a ton of types and this real event feels the worst and has crippled me the most- however it’s the only thing that awoke me to deploy and fight with ERP!

Kids4Christ

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 3y

Yes!

Evelyn444

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 3y

This is exactly what I’m going through right now…

anonymoussad...

Date posted: Yesterday

Are you still struggling with this? I'm currently going through something similar I think but could be wrong would love someone to talk to to get another perspective

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