I am 7 weeks postpartum and my OCD has been awful since the baby was about a week old. I am currently seeing a therapist that specializes in perinatal mood disorders. She gave me a paper titled the 4 steps in the self treatment of OCD. Relabel, reattribute, refocus, and revalue written by Dr. Jeffrey Schwartz. Has anyone tried this? I know that ERP is the standard but wanted to see if this was effective.
Any advice on how to stop rumination?
That is ALWAYS a great question. Rumination is SO DIFFICULT to sort out. My NOCD therapist recommended a bunch of great articles by Dr Michael J Greenberg. His whole deal is rumination focused ERP. Look him up, the content is free on his site. Go to articles and honestly just read them all, in order. It can get a bit technical in places (because a lot of it is written for therapists rather than clients), but it has been really helpful for me. I come back to it on occasion to refresh myself on it.
Congratulations on the baby and I'm so sorry that you are going through this. My OCD became very apparent with the birth of my daughter as well, and I struggled a lot. When I finally saw a psychiatrist after she turned one, the first book he told me to read was "Brain Lock" by Dr. Jeffrey Schwartz, and it helped me immensely. I found the four step method very helpful, very practical, and still use it. Though I am looking to find a therapist who specializes in ERP to continue to treat my OCD, that book was pretty life changing. Good luck in your treatment!
Thank you very much! I will absolutely buy the book recommendation! I am open to anything. I just want so badly to be well. I am having a hard time enjoying this time because of the war in my mind. The constant cycle of thoughts and anxiety is also making me depressed. I am trying to tell myself it will get better but it is hard
My psychiatrist recommended Brain Lock by Schwartz as well. It's on my list to read.
Brain lock is great as are the 4 steps. Just a word of warning though, I think it does tend to work better for physical compulsions (rather than mental ones like rumination) because mentally going through the 4 steps can sometimes turn into a form of rumination or avoidance of anxiety. The 4 steps were a great start for me though personally. They helped me understand what was going on with me.
I had to buy a second copy of Brain Lock because I wrote notes all over the first one, highlighted sentences, reread it over and over and it got worn out. I also bought You Are Not Your Brain and it was good too but I actually prefer Brain Lock.
When I was in my 20's, prior to having such amazing access online to NOCD and ERP treatment, I found the book Brainlock to be a life saver. I will say that there are a few things that ERP does differently but overall this book is amazing. You could also check out NOCD's support groups. But know that you are not alone and OCD symptoms onset after birth is common. I wish you all the best and I am so glad you found this community.
Hi everyone, I’m Cayla. I’m a mom that’s lived with OCD since childhood, but my breaking point came more recently after having my son. I was consumed by terrifying thoughts—What if I hurt him? What if I did something awful without realizing it? I was so afraid of my own mind that I couldn’t be alone with him. The shame and exhaustion were unbearable, and I convinced myself I was broken. In 2024, I finally sought help. ERP therapy at NOCD was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but it saved my life. Even now, I have tough days, but I know I don’t have to be ruled by OCD. When my 12 year old daughter began showing signs of OCD, I felt overwhelmed with guilt. I never wanted her to go through what I had, but I knew what to do. I told her that I have OCD too and made sure she knew it wasn’t her fault—and that she wasn’t alone. One of the hardest parts of this journey was trusting someone else with my daughter’s OCD. I knew how vulnerable it feels to share intrusive thoughts, and I wanted her to feel safe. Her NOCD therapist was able to establish trust and genuine empathy from the start, and that relationship gave her the confidence to face ERP head-on. Seeing her build that trust made me certain she was in the right hands. ERP has helped both of us reclaim our lives, and it is beautiful to see my daughter managing her condition and making visible progress. Parenting with OCD while raising a child with OCD isn’t talked about enough, but I know so many parents are struggling with these same challenges. If you have questions about managing OCD while parenting, helping your child through ERP, or breaking cycles of guilt, drop them below—I’d love to share what I’ve learned. I’ll be answering all of the questions I receive in real-time today 4-5pm ET.
Hi guys! I’m new to the community and I’ve recently received my OCD diagnosis (tho I’ve known about it since childhood). I’ve been somewhat spiraling lately as I wait for my first ERP session (hooray!) I was just wondering if any of you guys have received ERP for existential OCD and if it was successful? My existential OCD compulsions are more so mental and have been affecting me in the sense of dream/memory flashbacks and giving me a sort of “uncanny” feeling about everything around me. Any advice is appreciated! Thank you❤️
December 14, 2024, marked two years since my first ERP therapy session with my NOCD therapist, Mixi. And October 2024 marked a year of being free from OCD. It was not an easy journey, confronting my fears face to face. Exposing myself to the images and thoughts my brain kept throwing at me, accepting that I might be the worst mother, that my daughter wouldn’t love me, and that I deserved to be considered a bad person. It was challenging having to say, “Yes, I am those things,” feeling the desire to run, but realizing the thoughts followed me. At the start of my therapy, I remember feeling like I couldn’t do this anymore. Life felt unbearable, and I felt so weak. I longed for a time before the OCD, before the flare-ups, before the anxiety, the daily panic attacks. I thought I’d never be myself again. But I now know that ERP saved my life. The first couple of sessions were tough. I wasn’t fully present. I lied to my therapist about what my actual thoughts were, fearing judgment. I pretended that the exposures were working, but when the sessions ended, I went back to not sleeping, constantly overwhelmed by fear and anxiety. But my therapist never judged me. She made me feel safe to be honest with her. She understood OCD and never faltered in supporting me, even when I admitted I had been lying and still continued my compulsions. My biggest milestone in therapy was being 100% transparent with my therapist. That was when real change began. At first, I started small—simply reading the words that terrified me: "bad mom," "hated," "unloved." Then, I worked on listening to those words while doing dishes—not completely stopping my rumination, but noticing it. Just 15 minutes, my therapist said. It wasn’t easy. At one point, I found myself thinking, “Will I ever feel like myself again?” But I kept pushing through. Slowly, I built tolerance and moved to face-to-face exposures—sitting alone with my daughter, leaning into the thought that my siblings might die, reading articles about my worst fears, and calling myself the things I feared. Each session was challenging, but with time, the thoughts started to lose their grip. By my eleventh session, I started to realize: OCD was here, and it wasn’t going away, but I could keep living my life despite it. I didn’t need to wait for it to be quiet or go away to move on. Slowly, it began to quiet down, and I started to feel like myself again. In fact, I am not my old self anymore—I’m a better version. OCD hasn’t completely disappeared, but it’s quieter now. Most of the time, it doesn’t speak, and when it does, I know how to handle it. The last session with my therapist was emotional. I cried because I was finishing therapy. I remember how, in the beginning, I cried because I thought it was just starting—because I was overwhelmed and terrified. But at the end, I cried because I was sad it was ending. It felt like I had come so far, and part of me wasn’t ready to say goodbye, even though I had already learned so much. It was a bittersweet moment, but I knew I was walking away stronger, equipped with the tools to handle OCD on my own. If I could change anything about my journey, it would be being open and honest from the beginning. It was the key to finding true healing. The transparency, the honesty—it opened the door to lasting change. I’m no longer that person who was stuck in constant panic. I’m someone who has fought and survived, and while OCD still appears from time to time, I know it doesn’t define me. I'd love to hear your thoughts and comments. Have you started therapy, is something holding you back? Is there something you want to know about ERP therapy? I'll be live in the app answering each and every one today from 6-7pm EST. Please drop them below!
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