- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
yep! totally common. went thru it bad past month and a half and i’m slowly feeling like im doing a little better but still sometimes bothers me. as you mentioned it is temporary, are you doing ERP?
Just been so exhausted and tired of dealing with OCD lately lol kind of jus put me in a depressive state of mind like it’s not gonna get better and then that’s where the suicidal intrusive thoughts came? Which then makes it 10X worse…I love life but being depressed just makes it hard to look forward to stuff and see past it ya know?
@Anonymous are you actually depressed or do you think it’s more of depressive emotions itself? there’s shockingly a difference
@username255 Not been diagnosed with depression. But just feel anxious and hopeless right now. Hard to see past it. Been feeling like it for the past 3 hours
@Anonymous i competely understand that. i was like that for 4 months. it’s not fun but there’s light!! that’s something i can promise you.
@username255 Good deal man. I appreciate that foreal. I got two boys and one on the way and I love them more than life itself and just need something to hold onto bro. Any tips?
@Anonymous you just gave yourself one. you wanna be a good parent. you got them to hold onto. its against your morals, that’s why these thoughts bother you so much. they are just thoughts man. the fact you’re on here anxious and stuff shows that’s probably the last thing you wanna do. maybe you do, maybe you don’t. quit trying to figure it out it’ll save you tons
Yes! I was diagnosed with S-OCD, MDD & GAD in March after being hospitalized for suicidal ideations (which wasn’t a true diagnosis). I definitely have days where I feel the depression more or feel the OCD more and anxiety is just a constant. You’re already starting with the right mindset that your current obsessions are temporary and things will eventually get better. I think we all forget this too often!
Would I know if I was suicidal man? Like I’m super scared of it. Idk I just feel like I’m in a dark place because of OCD lately. And it’s hard to see past it.
@Kids4Christ You’ll know. The intrusive thoughts become wayyyyy more convincing. People who are truly suicidal have a firm intention and plan to end their life. https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/suicidal-ocd-2
yeah it's possible to have intrusive thoughts about suicide, if that's what you're asking! I don't have them myself but I'd assume they'd take the shape of like "i don't want to die/kill myself, but what if I did/what if I secretly do?" in the same way that most intrusive thoughts suggest you might want or do something that you fear
Yeah I know it’s just the depression that’s kind of just making it super confusing. I don’t want to die. I love life it’s just been very stressful these past couple months
Yes, many have it on here.
Can you have an intrusive thought/feeling about not wanting to live or feeling like there’s no purpose?
Yep I had a brief moment of suicidal ocd a few days ago. I’m kinda depressed but I don’t wanna kill myself but it’s normal to have because ocd can latch onto anything at anytime
Yes. I was diagnosed with depression and intrusive fair of committing suicide was my very first reason to visit psychiatrist. Cured from depression, trying to deal with OCD.
Trigger Warning: Suicide I’m 21(Female) just for reference Anyone else struggling with OCD so much to where you feel so isolated, confused, burnout, suffering & in astonishing emotional pain & agony. I promise yall aren’t alone in the feelings. I promise you there is someone going through similar, obviously our lives aren’t identical, but our struggles can be very similar. It’s even harder dealing with trauma, split parents, abusive parent(s), a sick parent at the same time as all of this. It feels like God or the universe just WANTS you to struggle. Like it’s punishment for something you did as a kid or teenager. I’m dealing with all this exactly. Sometimes I just want support. So I hope this message can be support for someone struggling too & hope it helps them be able to breathe a little easier & gives them strength to go on another day. I just would like to mention if you have access to therapy take advantage of it. The therapists are not there to judge you but I promise it’s a them issue & you’re not a horrible person. When I used to think of suicide often I started to think less “doomsdayish” & realized that I wont know how my life will turn out if I just give up. If you give up you won’t ever know. Whether your situation will improve, & all the fear in your heart just gone. You could miss out on that freedom and happiness you’ve been waiting for in this current life we are living. One last thing I want to point out that I’ve thought about is that we don’t know how many more people are out there struggling with this. I think they’re maybe afraid of judgement. Basically what I’m implying is I feel like there are so many others out there who don’t want to speak up & are struggling with this. Everything on their conscious being afraid to even write it down. I just feel in my heart that there are others who keep these issues to themselves. I think I feel it in my heart because that was me once. Feeling like my story was different, afraid at thought of even telling a stranger(therapist) who could judge me. I did not want to be perceived badly. I’m 21 years old & wish I had the courage to speak up sooner I feel like I could’ve started seeing the light at the end of the tunnel sooner but that’s okay. Speak up for you, you do not have to wake up in fear everyday or contemplate suicide everyday. Even if it feels like you’re your only cheerleader. Sending a virtual hug to all because I know what it’s like to just want to be held & told that everything is going to work out. you never know what others are going through, be the person who isn’t afraid to extend your heart to others, try & breathe a little more, take care of yourselves, remember you aren’t alone no matter your situation, stay strong To the suicidal person reading this, you’re resilient & strong. Sending a virtual hug❤️.
I’m so scared I’ll be stuck in this forever soo soo scared
I’ve recently been struggling a lot with OCD. I have had OCD for a long time I just didn’t realize it until more recently. About seven months ago I developed panic attacks one day randomly at work. I thought I was having a heart attack and went to the hospital where they told me it was just a panic attack and I assumed I would snap out and be better within a few days. However it didn’t. Here’s where it gets scary, I was staying at my then boyfriends house while dealing with blurry vision, anxiety attacks everyday, and more (unsure of what was going on). But at some point I saw my bfs (pew pew 🔫) on his table and it sent me into an anxiety attack after sudden thoughts that I was going to hurt myself with it. I begged him to put it away when I’m not looking so I didn’t know where he put it. He did. These thoughts lasted for about four days but began to go away. (I thought that was it and I would be back to normal). Unfortunately though I ended up moving back in with my family when we couldn’t get my panic attacks under control in time for me to get back to work and pay bills. However, coming home brought up a lot of trauma from when I was kid. My anxiety got worse but I didn’t have those thoughts again. About two and half months ago though, I got sick and went to the hospital where they gave me steroid pills and a steroid shot but sent me into some kind of psychiatric event. Ever since then though, I have been suffering from harm OCD, I have had moments of intense anger that I usually have to completely walk away and go on my own because of how intense they are, and it feels like it’s getting worse. Today I felt fine until about and hour and half ago where I started to dwell on the fact that my suicidal thought was influenced by my OCD and at the moment my OCD is at the worst it’s been. This caused me to get suddenly really depressed and I started crying thinking about how I can’t handle this. I then saw a post talking about how suicide rates are high for people with this form of OCD and it made me question if I am mentally strong enough to pull through this. I fear that at times I’m getting worse. I have good days but I have a lot of bad days. Unfortunately this sent me into such a bad panic attack I went over to my nanas crying about how I can’t deal with this. I took a 0.25 mg Xanax which helped calm down the panic attack portion of it but my brain is still uncomfortably active. I guess I just need hope. I’m so saddened by this. It’s like my life took a total 360 in 10 months and got even worse since the steroid shot. Idk what to do about it. I can’t stop the spiral. I talk to two different therapist weekly and start more next week, making it 5 times a week. I feel no improvements…
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