I know I’m posting a lot today but I’m having a rubbish time. Does your ocd ever make you feel as though you really want to be that thing your obsessing over? Like today I’ve been able to say “I’m gay” and get almost a good feeling from it which worries me.

You should set hanging out with your female best friend as an exposure

I think there might be another explanation as to why you feel good about saying it aloud: it no longer has such a fearful grip on you that you think if you say it, it’s more likely to be true (magical thinking). You’ve habituated a degree of anxiety around this obsession and that’s something to be proud of. Don’t be scared it will rear it’s ugly head again- if it does you’ve got the skills to ride out the anxiety and habituate to it again

Thank you guys

It’s just OCD playing tricks on you

I know it all seems so real, but I used to have an obsession that scared me so much because it seemed so real. Then eventually it stopped seeming real, I had to talk back thousands of times and I ignored the thoughts, but it stopped.

they all seem so real, which is why they’re so scary!! if it was ocd at one point, then it’s always ocd. stay strong!!

Thanks guys it’s just really getting to me today! It feels like I would actually enjoy being gay!! I’m just so confused at the moment!

Sorry that I keep replying, I just thought of something. Maybe your not enjoying the thought of being gay, maybe your just enjoying thinking about having a companion (which wouldn’t be a girl, but since you’re afraid of that, OCD replaces your ideal companion with a girl to annoy you and scare you.)

Please don’t apologise for replying it’s helping me so much! I’d not thought about it from that point of view, you see I’m anxious about going back to uni as there were a few girls on my course who triggered my thoughts when hocd first happened. I haven’t seen my girl best friends in months! And I miss them! I have my boyfriend and he makes a great companion but I only get to see him once or twice a week because of our distance, he’s also moving away for work for a month soon which keeps playing on my mind

Its not real ocd does tricks with your brain