False memory ocd

How do you know the difference :( I genuinely cannot keep living in this torment. it all started with an ‘intrusive thought’ where I had like a hazy flash of something reading an article. and I remember thinking ‘what if’ and ‘what is this’ and then that intrusive thought turned into me ‘remembering’ something else. which caused me panic. then I started trying to find evidence because it contradicted what I remembered this entire time. this was last year in like september. fast forward to march this year, it came back up- but this time stronger and with more ‘details’ and what nots. and I’ve been ruminating on it since then trying to remember and connect and It’s like I’ve added all of these details. but are they real? or is this just my OCD? I just feel like if it were real I would have never been able to keep it to myself. but also what if it was so traumatic that I blocked it out? because it all makes NO sense for me to do something like that. but it also fits what I was thinking at the time. idk

I have false memory real event ocd, I’ve been married 13 years and I used to constantly bring up past mistakes from when we were dating and it RUINED our marriage, but I got medication and therapy and things got better untill a few weeks ago where everything crumbled. I have a memory that is 13 years ago of me being intimate with my husband (than boyfriend) while being intimate I have a memory of sending a text to a male who obviously liked me but I didi not while my husband was under the covers . And I keep thinking over and over how disgusting and inappropriate it was to do that especially doing it in the middle of being intimate 😞. I have confessed this to my husband last year and he didint believe me saying it’s probably a made up memory and would are not a slut and wouldn’t do that. Now i have guilt all over again for weeks and it’s taking such a toll on me it’s all I think about and try to remember every detail I’ve thought about it so much I don’t even know if it’s 100 percent true. But I can vividly see it when I close my eyes. How do I get over this guilt without confessing? Confessing would absolutely destroy my husband.

So I have been struggling with the same theme of ocd for 4 months now. My ocd centers around past events/false memories that ocd skews to make seem bad or it twists my thoughts on what my intentions were. this is related to cheating or being weird while I have been in my amazing relationship. I have never cheated on my partner and never will and I believe it is wrong. But my ocd is telling me other wise. I love my partner so very much and I would never want to hurt him but my brain is getting to me. I was getting better. I was trying “maybe I did, maybe I didn’t”, I have been back on meds and in therapy and I stopped confessing random interactions from years/months ago about 1.5 weeks ago and it really helped. But now I woke up this morning and feel the pit in my stomach again. I feel extra critical and like why would you do this? What does this say about you? What was your intention with this? And I’m just stuck mentally reviewing and ruminating on everything you could imagine. I know my personality and I know in the moment maybe I did find them attractive but mainly I was just being nice or funny or even just a good friend, but looking back now I’m like “was it flirting?” “Why did I still snap this person” “why would I even talk to them” and stuff like that. I feel this intense sense of guilt. I have told my partner everything that I keep getting stuck on and he didn’t care, he said he understands or “that’s a little weird but it’s okay” and hasn’t missed a beat. He said eveything I’ve told him is normal and I’ve heard that from my friends too. I just really need help. I don’t know what to do anymore. I am so disappointed because I thought I was gonna be done with this, so why am I still so worried and caught up in this.