Sleep anxiety and OCD

After many many subtypes, I managed to come up with a mix of sleep anxiety an OCD. Instead of fearing I will harm someone or not loving my wife or whatever thought, I go like ''What if that thought ruins my sleep?" I've developed several fears concerning my sleep: Fear of being buried alive, fear of dying in sleep, fear of being punished by God with insomnia and lately, having fatal insomnia. The problem is that I'm two completely different persons when I do or do not sleep. As I sleep night after night, my anxiety decreases to the point I feel 98% recovered - just to lose a night of sleep and go back at square one. Over the last 4 months I would go like ''sleep for 8 nights- lose a night- sleep again-repeat". I managed to get 40 consecutive days without losing a night. I was so, so fine. Last night, I didn't sleep for a minute. I'm desperate, as if all my progress was lost, and fearing I will never sleep again. I dont know what to do, or what even to expose myself to :(

neither_freer

Date posted: 2y

I’ve been struggling with the exact same thoughts lately. It just started 4 nights ago. It’s been a nightmare. I’m trying to get through each day but it’s all I think about. It’s so comforting to know I’m not alone. I’ve struggled with harm OCD in the past and eventually overcame it. I’m hoping I’ll overcome this, as well. Thank you for sharing, I’m sending you so much love. We’ve got this

Anonymous

Date posted: 2y

Thank you so much for the reply! It's really awful. I don't even know how to practice ERP here. What should I expose myself to?

neither_freer

Date posted: 2y

@Anonymous Honestly, accepting the lack of sleep. Exposing myself to laying in bed without being able to sleep and then accepting that sure, I may not have slept, but I’m still here. And that my reaction to the lack of sleep is worse than the actual effects of it. I’m still trying to overcome it myself. I sobbed all day yesterday after not sleeping at all the night before. That’s actually what caused me to download this app

Anonymous

Date posted: 2y

@sav - It's really good to know I'm not alone. How have you slept over the past days?

neither_freer

Date posted: 2y

@Anonymous I’ve honestly been crying and hyperventilating so hard that it kind of makes my body weak enough to sleep ahahaha. I also have some xanax saved from my old prescription that have helped me sleep because Benadryl wasn’t helping. I’m hoping to eventually be able to sleep on my own. But when I’ve been up all night, I get desperate. I got about 5 hours last night and feel a bit better but still very sleep deprived. How about you? What helped you sleep when you recovered last time?

neither_freer

Date posted: 2y

I have the same exact fears of dying of fatal insomnia and also losing my mind due to lack of sleep. It’s so comforting to know I’m not alone. The fact that you were able to recover each night is inspiring and you will get there again

Anonymous

Date posted: 2y

Look up Daniel Erickson on YouTube if you’re still struggling with this.

neither_freer

Date posted: 2y

I tried to practice exposure earlier by laying in bed and trying to sleep. When I couldn’t sleep, I accepted it instead of fighting and didn’t feel panic this time.

DreamCat

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

Oh wow. This was my big theme that brought me to NOCD. I’ve had OCD for a long time, but this fear of not sleeping & going psychotic was by far the worst that I had to go on antidepressants because of it. I have a whole story around it, but the good news is that I engrained ERP hard into my day-to-day life, and it’s really brought me some peace. I’m not fully recovered, but a lot of promising results have happened.

neither_freer

Date posted: 2y

@DreamCat Oh my god, we share such similar stories. I’ve suffered from OCD my entire life and this sleep OCD is the worst theme yet. I’m terrified of going psychotic from insomnia. It’s also the reason I reached out to NOCD. Your story brings me so much hope. Thank you so much

dollar

Date posted: 16w

I can't control the intrusive thoughts that come to me every time I go to sleep

English is my second language,so please bear with me if there are any shortcomings. My OCD is manifested in the need to go to the bathroom before going to bed every time, but after each urination, I worry that I will have to go to the bathroom again because I feel that I seem haven't finished. This will affect my sleep by repeatedly entering and exiting the bathroom. It takes me more than half an hour to go to the bathroom before going to bed every time, and I have to fight with myself to tell myself that I have finished and don't have any more urine, so I can sleep peacefully. However, it takes countless times to comfort myself.I tried to quickly finish urinating and then immediately step out of the bathroom, but every time I had the thought of "I still feel like I have a little more urine, should I squat again?" I felt like I was nailed to the toilet and couldn't get out. (Our toilets here are squat toilets), which greatly shortened my daily sleep time. Moreover, after using the toilet, I would continue to use my phone to relieve anxiety and develop a habit of staying up late, which undoubtedly exacerbated my symptoms.It's like a process of constantly pursuing certainty, making sure that I have completely emptied my bladder, but this pursuit is morbid, and I can't accept its uncertainty.I don't know what to do. Do you have any solutions?

baukje

Date posted: 11w

Erp for insomnia ?

I have, alongside my other OCD themes, an intense fear of insomnia. Although this has been improving somewhat — partly thanks to medication and The sleep school on YouTube — I still find myself ruminating about it throughout the day when I have something important the next day, I get stuck in the fear that everything will be ruined — for both myself and others — because my mind is so preoccupied with sleep. + a fear of depression coming back. It honestly feels like a form of sleep OCD. I'm not sure if that’s an official thing, but that’s how it feels to me. A form of erp is the idea of befriending wakefulness. That works great tbh. Things like sleep hygiene, meditation, etc. — tend to backfire because my OCD latches onto them and becomes too obsessive about “doing them right.” I’m genuinely wondering whether ERP — for example in the form of a worst-case-scenario audio loop (imaginal exposure) — could be helpful in this case. I’m hesitant to start unless I know it can actually help. Is there anyone who has experience with this or thoughts about it? I’m not looking for reassurance or tips to fall asleep — only for ideas on how ERP might be applied in this situation.

ocdissucky

Date posted: 8w

Sleeping

Does anyone have any tips on how to sleep with harm ocd, I’m always so tired but I can’t fall asleep until it gets to the point my eyes won’t stay open, I’m scared that I’m gonna do something in my sleep or my thoughts just eont shut up and it causes issues with sleeping, advice needed please

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Sleep anxiety and OCD

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