Has anyone ever had ocd focus on the devil? Whenever I watch a show where they portray him as wounded or the good guy I start to believe it myself, like start questioning if Satan was bad or if God was unfair about punishing him. It's driving me insane because I keep obsessing over how I'll get possessed or turn into a horrible person because of these thoughts. But I don't know how to get rid of them or how to do any exposure in this situation cause even though I'm not a believer in God, I fear evil, and I can't touch it even if it helps. All I do is compulsively pray and beg God for forgiveness and I hate the cycle but don't know how to break it.

I need help everyone. My thoughts have been getting worse… I haven’t used my ERP because it feels too scary and too real and so I am caught in this spiral of doing compulsions with every other thought that I have. I have thoughts about that bad guy that are so horrible and then I think that the bad guy is talking to me so I do compulsions and desperately want GOD to believe me when I say I don’t mean the thoughts, but then it creates doubt about whether or not I actually do mean the thoughts. And now I am afraid of my own thoughts This makes me want to fix ALL of the thoughts and feelings that I have to prove even more to myself and to GOD that I don’t mean these thoughts. On top of all of this, I am trying to convince myself that it’s OCD and not me at all. Does anyone have this and can anyone help? I am so tired and scared and burnt out…

Have you ever been through Very bad thoughts about your brain wants to twist anything about good or bad like evil and good which is god and sat*n and panicking because you believe In god but your brain is messing with you have you ever felt like you're afraid you had commit blasmphy in your thoughts It's very bad thoughts like omg where does these toughts come from?? Please tell me your experience One moment I feel okay and I can pray and vent to god and other moment I'm so ashamed of myself for thinking like that Am I alone in this am I crazy?

I put a trigger warning because I will be discussing themes of end of times. I feel like I'm not following God's will. God knows ultimately that things were going to speed up end of times wise. A few months ago, I had a random thought to call someone I had affected with past sin and apologize to him although I did not know he was there, my sin affected him. I know he deserves an apology, but I chalked it up to ocd and treated it as such for months fast forward to now I feel like I'm completely against God. Horrifying. It's a complex situation I caused and therefore though I know he deserves an apology I'm really scared as I created a mess of things. I've been praying that God help certain things come to fruition so I could be exposed and help minister to others if that's what He's calling me to do but no answer. Instead horrible images and thoughts and feelings of doom. I see signs to apologize everywhere. I'm at my wits end. Because I tend to get ahead of myself I asked two family members and they said don't and then I see things that say Though people in your life mean well, don't go based on what they say only what God says. I tell God to do His will and I'll follow, do you think He'll listen. I even told Him I straight up don't want to do it, not because He doesn't deserve one, but because last time I apologized to someone else I didn't do it right and it was messy. I feel so evil, like a wolf in sheep's clothing. I also remember looking up morbid things for what???? Only to be disturbed pray about it and leave by why search it up again? I also fantasized alot about guys I've been single forever, late 20s now, I'm trying to go to church and my crush is there and I try to stop thinking about him because I know it's delusional but the thoughts don't leave. I'm so tired I want to stop but stop what? Living? I want to stick to God as close as possible. I'm going crazy.