Has anyone ever had ocd focus on the devil? Whenever I watch a show where they portray him as wounded or the good guy I start to believe it myself, like start questioning if Satan was bad or if God was unfair about punishing him. It's driving me insane because I keep obsessing over how I'll get possessed or turn into a horrible person because of these thoughts. But I don't know how to get rid of them or how to do any exposure in this situation cause even though I'm not a believer in God, I fear evil, and I can't touch it even if it helps. All I do is compulsively pray and beg God for forgiveness and I hate the cycle but don't know how to break it.

It could be. The environment we grow up into has also a role to play in this. About the show, you know the difference between the character and the real figure. I totally understand what you're saying, you have to be the one in charge of your decisions, nobody else. Ocd is just one huge bump in the road, but can also be overcame

I'm gonna talk from experience. A few years ago I had ocd related to death/religious themes and after a while it went away. A few weeks ago I started to watch the show Lucifer that portays the devil in a very "human" way. Now I'm completely aware of yhe fact that the devil isn't like that in real life however I felt sympathetic towards the character and then thid new theme developed and I thought it was because of it. The thing is, IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT. While now I can't watch that show because I could be triggered, it had nothing to do with it. What you're experiencing is a classic episode of religious ocd. I know it, I've been though it. I didn't do exposure back then but believe it really does help you. The fact that ocd is making you act like a different person is enough to make you understand how you're being manipulated by this illness. Everything will be alright, you'll overcome this xx

I used to have those fears as well when I was little between 6 t o 12, then in my teen years the thoughts just got twisted with sexual images as well and other crazy thoughts that made it hard to focus or make friends. But as years went on I slowly realized those fears were just part of my brain's development. I used to think that I was living in a virtual reality and that my brain was in some lab in a glass container and my life was a dream omg? the way I broke the cycle of the religious OCD was to start picturing the universe. So now I dont think of a red devil with horns or a man on a cross. Before I go to bed I relax my body and picture the universe in my mind. So I picture creation as the universe. With no good or evil just infinite starts and darkness and I visualize myself there:). Try it out it might help you. I wish I was more open about this when I was younger. I am 28 now. It took many years for me to talk about these things :).

@notfortalk I've been watching Lucifer as well and have grown attached to the character and feel sympathy, I think the show kind of blurs my mind sometimes between real and fiction, makes me question things. I don't wanna quit watching the show though because I like it, but it does sometimes trigger me. But I've dealt with religious ocd before and it's popped up here and there. I imagine it has more to do with my very religious family instead of tv. I already feel bad enough for not believing but maybe that's why my ocd is so attatched to this theme? Idk it's so confusing to me and so much scarier than any other theme I've dealt with before (besides pocd) and whenever I try to talk to my mom about it she just says I have to be religious if I think I can get possesed etc. Makes me doubt myself even more. Ocd is really kicking my ass more than usual with this stuff.

This is actually a nice suggestion :)

The best thing I could tell you is to stop watching stuff like that