Hi all! I’ve been doing really well with my OCD, but I’ve been in a flair up the last few days and it’s so uncomfortable and distressing. It’s so hard to remember that I’m strong when OCD is so loud.
Remember what you just said. It’s uncomfortable. Not life threatening, not fatal, not life altering but uncomfortable. That it is. It sucks. It takes our safety, space, and comfort. But it thrives to be front and center, a hearty fire with plenty of self supplied fuel. Starve that fire, but never think you can extinguish it. A brain is like a hard drive - you need to allocate space to let it hum in the background. Let the voices fight: the worried, the condescending, and the rational. Have at it. Easier said then done. Have had OCD for over 50 years. New thoughts take over old ones - they’re all yammering for a platform. Turn the what ifs into so what’s. Trust me - my fears over 5 decades never, NEVER came to fruition. It takes on new thoughts, new dimensions that get a physical reaction and when it does OCD says YES, I got her. I’m somatic and pure O. All the torture is in my head, not in my physical world. Is it scary? Yes! Is it terrifying? Yes! Is it uncomfortable? Yes! Is it fatal? No. Is it life threatening? No. Is it REAL? NO! It’s a lying, deceiving disease. Does it suck? Hell yes! But it’s a part of you, and the more you deny it the space to let it chatter away, the more you unintentionally feed it.
Since I've started facing the OCD and fighting back my themes and intrusive thoughts (i have pure 0)...ocd has been louder.. I've gotten physically exhausted although mine is in my mind. Yesterday was tough for me.. I was driving and a lot of pedestrians were passing close to me car and jaywalking etc.. I got anxious throughout... Even when I reached home.. Anxiety went up for at least an hour (before this would take me days and weeks) I decided not to give in to OCD from the learnings of my therapist and literally said.. I don't care OCD.. Going to watch my movie.. I can't think about it right now and im not worrying about this... It's been difficult but every time I worry i just feel making ocd stronger.. So Im trying to fight back against ocd with the help of my therapist
Thank you so much for your responses. You reminded me of the strength that I do have in me. I want my strength to overcome my fear. I’m doing my exposures and I’m determined to turn my OCD down so I can get back to me.
Today i went back driving again... Still anxious from the day before.. But i went out of my way to unfamiliar roads to get home... Because I knew that would bug my OCD... Sure enough the familiar anxiety... People crossing close to my car.. I knew it would come .. I. Said yes.. There's a chance I could hit someone but im a good driver But anything can happen and leaned into that uncomfortable uncertainty... But guess what? The anxiety took less time to disappear tonight... Also i have social anxiety and i mingled freely this evening refusing to acknowledge OCD this evening.. Turned out to be a good evening :)
Does anyone Else’s ocd flare up bad when in stressful life situations? I was doing amazing and now that I’m having some drama with my life it seems to have come back with a vengeance. Anyone else?
Im having a OCD specifically contamination OCD flare up all month and I don’t want to feel this way going into March, I’ve thrown out clothes, towels, stayed up for hours doing compulsions, washed my hands till they crack and bleed, I have washing pilling up cause I’m so overwhelmed by all the extra things I’ve added cause I thought it was contaminated. It’s completely draining me to the point where I’ve become sleep deprived and are avoiding part of my home because they are deemed contaminated to me…I only moved in a few months ago, I had a roach problem and using baits and insecticides really messed with my ocd too. anyone have any tips or tricks to make this easier? I wasn’t doing this bad in January :( thankyou in advance :)
So I was doing good for about 5 months. I was going to therapy, practicing the skills, and for about the past month, I fell into a depression funk. The last week, however, has been a week of really loud OCD. I am in a constant state of anxiety and find myself doing compulsions. I'm wondering if anyone has experienced what I'm about to describe. I'm considering taking myself to the hospital, but my little boy's birthday party is this weekend and I don't want to miss it: I keep having this bad feeling like I actually want to do the bad things in my mind. I know OCD intrusive thoughts can tell you "I want to" but this just seems different - maybe it's OCD trying to come at me a new way. It's not like thoughts telling me "I want" it's like even when I tell myself I don't want to do the bad stuff, there's this nagging feeling telling me I really want to. I'm scared.
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