i was mindfully calling myself a boy and using him/his pronouns and i felt very comfortable. my tocd just sets back ?

im mindful. also going to therapy. i think to myself - it would be fine even if i was male . just thoughts that make you feel neautral

Yes! Same! I worry it was because I wanted to be a guy deep down or something

Ughh yeah! I perk up now and it’s as if it’s melded to by being

i was in your situation this time last year it’s not always going to last i was assigned female at birthday and still identify as female and use she/her pronouns but do whatever you feel comfortable with

ive been suffering for tocd for 3 years and ive done everything but it just comes back like a pain in the as*hole

i too am a girl i just suffer with thoughts that i could be a man

at birth* auto correct sorry but you’re going to get past this i was in a TOCD cycle for about 7 months straight it’ll all feel okay again i promise

:) yeah

How’d you get better? It kills me because it feels like I’m jealous or want to be a guy

Hmm, yeah, but my mind turns those natural thoughts into a sort of desperate anxiety that gets interpreted as jealousy or something smh -_-

yeah i know :( i want to find a way to disregard these thoughts but they always crawl back. a a l w a a y s

It’s so awful! It goes back and forth a ton between being happy and feeling like it’s real so I’m worried I’m genderfluid or the fact that dysphoria apparently comes in waves also scares me to death

its best to tell someone youre going through this because if you dont, it will suffocate you from the inside. happened to me! its important to talk.

I have been! I feel like my parents don’t understand that it feels real even if it is irrational and they also don’t get how long it lasts

my parents dont understand it too but my mother tries to be supportive. when i told my therapist i had obsessive thoughts about my gender and my mother listened i SWEAR she had like a WTF face .

Ikr! My therapist was like “it’s up to you to find your identity” and didn’t seem to understand ahh

yeah my previous therapist was an ass :/ she was all about money and didnt help at all

I was curious... To counteract the tocd thing do you ever imagine yourself as very pretty and feminine? I used to like it but now it doesn’t do anything and if anything it makes me uncomfortable! So frustrating...

yeah , dresses and makeup feel very weird to me. femininity seems like something thats not for me anymore even though i used to be feminine.

well not like VERY feminine , i just felt pretty in dresses etc etc

Yes same! I loved looking good and wearing girly stuff but now it feels like I’m cheating myself and I’m the type to admire a pretty girl, not BE one :’(

But yeah, I wasn’t overly feminine when I was little. I wasn’t repulsed by my body or anything but I didn’t care to look pretty and liked to catch bugs

me TOO!!

My big issue right now is personalities and how it feels “too easy” to relate to guys and almost like I’m jealous of them and the roles they get to play which is half true but I don’t feel as if I’m one inside

yeah same. its also hard because when i played games i chose male characters etc etc

Ugh I imagine being liked by a guy and feeling uncomfortable like I want to be the guy and I hate it. Never felt this way before

yeah, relatable feeling

i even worried that my ex was trans lol

I also obsess over others gender. Scrolling through Twitter I’ll check everyone’s bio to see if they’re trans. It sucks because it makes it seem super common and as if the odds of not being trans aren’t in my favour or something

yeah and like im not transphobic at all, i support everyone and anyone!

I have a trans friend on Twitter whom I’m close with (thank god I haven’t asked anything about being trans, that would kill me) and occasionally I’d ponder the thought of dating him. Never felt weird to me that he’s trans till now

yeah, the term transgender didnt feel so weird and 'close' to me before. now the word just feels like it belongs to me