Struggling with intrusive thoughts about partner cheating despite trusting him?

Cheating ocd

My brain feels so loud like I’m getting thoughts about my partner cheating on me and I hate it I know he would never but my thoughts keep coming up like every time his phone goes off my intrusive thoughts is like what is it’s a girl or something like that and it’s horrible because I’m not the sort of person to think these sort of things like he loves me so much and I love him so much and my thoughts are making me analysis everything he does and it’s stressing me out can someone help me please!

Username: TPDTPD

Date posted: 2y ago

I would suggest two things: One, try to handle this yourself for the most part. Let the thoughts in, let them run around and give you anxiety, and then breathe them out. Look, I can’t tell you with absolute certainty your partner isn’t cheating on you, but I can tell you that it isn’t your worst case scenario. Your worst case scenario is that *you’ll never know if your partner is cheating on you*, because OCD thrives on insecurity. If he tells you he’s cheating, you’ll get over it (though it’ll be painful!!) but living in this blank space will give you anxiety. Unfortunately you can’t ask him every second to tell you if he’s cheating, so just let the thoughts sit. They’ll get easier! Two, I want you to tell your partner IF YOU’RE COMFORTABLE. This isn’t normal worries; this is OCD. You have to be careful with it. Don’t ask him if he’s cheating. If he doesn’t know you have OCD, explain it; then either way, say: “My OCD is trying to convince me you’re cheating on me. I don’t know if that’s true, and don’t tell me if it is. It’s not going to help. This has nothing to do with you and everything to do with my OCD. I just wanted to let you know.” He should support you without reassuring you and maybe this’ll give you some comfort. Also remember that you’re allowed to be genuinely suspicious if your partner is cheating on you—real fears can coexist with OCD—but these are OCD fears and they’re irrational. Treat them as such! You’ll be okay, though it may not seem like it. Just let yourself breathe. You are doing incredible.

Username: 🌧☕️🌧☕️

Date posted: 2y ago

Thank u so much I’m trying to say to myself “oh this is a silly thought, anyways” but ocd makes it like it’s real and needs to find certainty but I know it’s my ocd playing up because it knows that it’s my biggest fear and how good me and my bfs relationship is. I know he is a loyal man but my ocd is like how do U know and all of that bullshit. he knows I have anxiety but not ocd only one person does and that’s my aunt I don’t really like telling people because it’s so personal and it’s so misunderstood sadly, I just rather keep it to myself for the time being. in the future when I feel more comfortable I will tell more people about my ocd. I am dealing with my thoughts better but sometimes they catch me unexpectedly and that’s when I go down and downhill anxious spiral. Thank you so much this really helped !

Username: ssierra22ssierra22

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

This was a helpful thread. It’s a new theme that’s popped up for me recently with my now husband and I’m like I HAVE NO REAL REASON TO THINK THIS

Username: tasha123

Date posted: 5y ago

Anyone else fear falling out of love with your partner and falling in love with someone else you know of? My ocd convinces me this other guy I go to university with is ‘the one’ and creates false memories! It’s the worst feeling ever i feel so much guilt and don’t feel happy and loving when I’m around my boyfriend anymore :( I don’t want to be with anyone else but my boyfriend I just wish I was happy with him and never had these thoughts in the first place.

Relationship OCD

Username: Maureen

Date posted: 5y ago

How do you know it's a false memory/OCD and not something that actually happened? I feel like a terrible person. I'm a very creative person, and the more I stress about whether I did this bad thing the more it seems real. The worst part is is that I have no way of reassurance without sounding crazy. I have ROCD and I randomly started obsessing over the 7 months of our relationship whether or not I've cheated on him. Even though I love him more than anything and I would never do that! I'm constantly triggered by coworkers or classmates that I've previously found attractive or liked and/or I know they've liked me or flirted with me. I'm at the point now where I'm rereading simple texts/straightforward texts of these people asking me about school work or if I could cover a shift trying to find proof of something I can't remember. My partner knows about my OCD and is very understanding and supportive. I feel like I'm living a lie. When this first started my rational brain knew this wasn't real, but the more I become obsessed the more it becomes more distorted. I feel guilty for being happy. I just want to be guaranteed it's not real so I can move on with my life. It's moving to specific people now and it's scaring me how real it feels.

Username: Mayte

Date posted: 35w ago

Back again.

I was doing fine for over a month.. I was managing my ocd really well till yesterday. I was at my friends house for her birthday and she invited me, 3 other girls and 2 other guys and her bf but one of the guys look attractive he looked good but I wish that’s where it would end. But instead my heads like cheat or it felt like I wanted to cheat when I know I would never and I hate the fact that I even got that thought like why can’t I just find another guy attractive without my brain telling me to cheat. It felt like I wanted to cheat and I got so scared because why would I do that or get that :/ I don’t want to cheat on my boyfriend I love my boyfriend. I’m scared that I actually wanted to cheat and I wanna confess to my bf so bad :/ but no like I know I didn’t want to but it feels like I did :/

Relationship OCD

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Struggling with intrusive thoughts about partner cheating despite trusting him?

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