itwillallbeokay
- Date posted
- 2y
why does this make me question my values?
does anyone else feel like their OCD makes them feel uncertain about their values? there’s always a weird layer of not understanding myself below my OCD.
NickNick
- Date posted
- 2y
From my own experience: OCD wins when it gets you in your head questioning what you believe instead of being in the present moment. This is gonna sound weird, but It’s not actually your values that is the issue, it is always your response to the particular thought (values) that is the issue. It’s normal to question your values, but OCD wants to get you stuck in your head trying to “figure” out the uncertainty behind the unknown I doing different types of compulsions where are irrational. You have to learn to separate what thoughts are your OCD and what thoughts are you. To an extent, it’s normal to be uncertain about what you believe. Or, let me put it this way: it’s normal to not know everything. Your OCD will tell you that it’s not normal to not know everything, but that’s a lie. People with OCD, including myself, can have trouble accepting uncertainty, Learning to observe your OCD thoughts, accept the presence of them, without reacting to them is something that I highly recommend. I’ve gotten better but I still need to improve much much more. Regarding uncertainty, We will never know everything. That being said, Learning to recognize what thoughts are your OCD and what thoughts are YOU is essential (this is something I struggle with still myself but I am trying to get better). These are easier things to say in theory than to do in practice but as long as you’re truly seeking help and putting 1 foot in front of the other that is all you can do.
kbttexas@yahoo.comkbttexas@yah...
- Date posted
- 2y
@Nick Nick thank you for this helpful word. I have trouble with uncertainty and saying that “OCD will tell you that it’s not normal to not know everything, but that’s a lie” was like laying down under a weighted blanket. Thanks for helping me feel safer tonight.
NickNick
- Date posted
- 2y
Another thought. I have felt uncertain about my values in the past but as I got older and better at dealing with OCD I begin to realize that I was just not OK with a normal level of uncertainty but my OCD made me think I should freak out about it. Don’t engage with your intrusive thoughts when you get them. That’s part of OCD‘s game it plays.
kbttexas@yahoo.comkbttexas@yah...
- Date posted
- 2y
@Nick What do you say to yourself to keep them at bay and not engage? I always think the thoughts/my subconscious mind knows more than my conscious mind and these are my “real” thoughts coming through…. What if they were and I get hurt again? I have ROCD and went through a traumatic divorce after decades married. A precious relationship came back from my past a year after divorce, and I ended it because of those incredibly unwanted thoughts and spirals about why I couldn’t love him like he loved me. I fear I’ve made a terrible mistake. I know for certain that I was loved because the man had never married because he had only ever loved me all these years. So why couldn’t I just let myself be happy? It’s almost as debilitating mentally as my divorce was emotionally. I feel busted.
NickNick
- Date posted
- 2y
@kbttexas@yahoo.com As for keeping the thoughts at bay, it’s just a mindfulness skill one develops after working through it. Same as my above comment, you have to keep trusting the process and getting out of your comfort zone in regards to treatment and getting better. I still have moments / hours/days where I just can’t get there mentally. For me, it’s usually because I’m too scared to talk about it out of fear of being judged. It’s a real normal fear to have, but it becomes the OCD when it’s overpowering, it stays with you for hours, days, and you can’t move in from it. That’s the OCD. Knowing what is an OCD thought and what isn’t an OCD thought is essential to working through it because you can’t treat something you’re unaware of. PROGRESS OVER PERFECTION. Also, anyone can do it, it just requires grit, and asking for help and working on yourself. Be patient, it takes time.
NickNick
- Date posted
- 2y
You will not always know in the moment. But the more you honestly and actively seek help and work on yourself/your ocd, the more you will increasingly know the difference between what is OCD and what isn’t. I still struggle with it, but I’ve improved. Aim for improvement, because that’s realistically all one can do.
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Anonymous
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 20w
Doubts about self expression
This obsession is new, but feels so much more grounded and it’s so anxiety inducing. Since the ocd started I’ve lost my sense of self and confidence. I got soocd and it slowly turned into be doubting my identity on whether I want to identify or dress masculine or feminine. I don’t feel good in the clothes I would typically wear out before I’m constantly overanalyzing how I’m feeling , it makes me really anxious and like I’m preforming. So then I started doubting if I would rather dress masculine and it’s extremely anxiety inducing and idk if it’s the ocd now but it feels like that’s how I want to dress.. that’s not what I associated with at all before the ocd but now it feels like that’s what would make me feel fully confident and loose in the world, does anyone else experience this??
K1790
- Date posted
- 14w
Unsure if OCD sometimes
I was diagnosed with OCD around the age of 6, subtype- contamination primarily. It calmed down as I got older and I assumed it had gone away, but also didn’t realize it can show up in other ways, and it still had been effecting me which I know now. I’m not 31 and I’ve been in therapy for a year and it’s helped a lot, although I sometimes get thoughts that what if some of the stuff I’m dealing with isn’t ocd and I’m exaggerating. I feel like thoughts will feel sticky and I’ll do certain compulsions but then the thought eventually vanishes if I do it a few times which makes me think maybe it’s not OCD since other people/friends I know would probably do the exact same thing. Not sure if I’m making sense, but I guess my question is if that thought comes up with anyone else? Just being unsure if something you’re doing actually is ocd or not.
Lemon1995
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 10w
Uncertainty
Why does ocd make you feel uncertain about everything. Even the things you knew were 100% certain before. Its so bizarre. All the subtypes like Rocd, Pocd, Hocd you should be 100% certain about these things but ocd makes you feel like you dont know. I sit here know saying in my head I DONT KNOW. its so hard and confusing. I just want to know who I am. Am I a good person like I thought I was and have been my whole life or am I someone else. I just dont know. Its awful
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