Idk if anyone else ever has dealt with something like this, please tell me if you have I feel so alone. I did something once (at least I think I did. Idk what’s real anymore) to a pet maybe 5 years ago. Well I got a kitten two years ago and I have always wanted one but I remember when I got it feeling so much anxiety like I didn’t deserve to be his mom. And something that is happening as it did a few minutes ago, I went downstairs to kiss him good night he’s sleeping and I thought hmm ? I could do “this” to him just like I did to “__” and no one would notice and I want to do it. And then I’ll get feelings like I want to. I feel like I’m possessed with a different person, a monster, how am I ever going to be able to be alone with my kitten when I move out?

Do you want to do that to the kitten?? Or is it this odd impulse that is not really you at all? I’ve had those before and just recognize that I will never actually do it and try to breathe through it

We know. Don't worry. I wish you to be well. And never forget you are not alone.❤ I had intrusive thoughts regarding my pets too and it is terrifying. Fortunately,now I am on OCD meds and I don't really have intrusive thoughts anymore,only rituals and stuff like that.

Medication never did anything to me ??

I have severe OCD. And also have depression and anxiety. I’ve been on zoloft, abilify, xanax and about 4 others I can’t remember the name of. Tried each one for about a year so I definitely gave it a good amount of time to work

Have you ever had any brain scan? CT,MRI?

Are the thoughts intrusive, unwanted? When they are in your mind do you feel okay with it?

Please don’t hurt your cat

SRM743 ? thanks for the advice. Obviously I don’t plan or want to hurt my cat.

Don't worry,there are different types of substances and they work differently on each individual. Can I ask what kind of meds you are on or tried so far?

And what is your diagnosis

I understand. You are doing therapy as well? Because it is very important. So,you took Zoloft (Sertraline) which is an antidepressant,but also used for OCD. Also, Abilify [Aripiprazole] , which is an antipsychotic,so I assume you suffer from major depression. Also,Xanax[Alprazolam],used for anxiety. I also assume you took this together. But,the first medicine prescribed for OCD should be Anafranil[Clomipramine]. In my case,this is my OCD drug mixed with Zoloft [Sertraline]. By the way,dosages diverse according to the case. Also for my major depression I take Quetiapine,similar to the Abilify you took. For anxiety I take Carbamazepine and Clonazepam if I sleep home alone. I took others before but now this is what works on myself. Unfortunately OCD is hard to treat but since is severe you can be on high dosages. I know it is hard,I am far from where I want to get,but I have lost almost entirely the intrusive thoughts I used to have. Now I still have rituals and stuff. Please ask for Anafranil and to therapy and never lose hope. You are not alone. ❤ Also,I am here if you need to talk I can give you my Facebook as well or whatever it is that you use,I don't know where you are from. Stay blessed ❤

I got moved up to the highest doses you could take for anything and it never worked. I also began having seizures which no one knows why and they think the medication played into it. Stopped taking it: seizures stopped. ??‍♀️

I do see an OCD specialist !

Yes of course! I’ve had them done a few times And everything comes back normal.