- Date posted
- 2y
Delusional memories?
Anybody think they have this? False memories? Or stuff they think they might have done in the past but don’t remember?
Anybody think they have this? False memories? Or stuff they think they might have done in the past but don’t remember?
It’s called false memory ocd :) u aren’t alone ❤️
This has been sort of happening to me! 😭😭😢 I am a first time mom and only had contamination OCD regarding my baby and now it’s shifting into that thinking “what if she touched something” “what if I didn’t wash my hands” and I don’t remember? I’ve been reading about it and it seems like it is false memory OCD 😥 Unfortunately, I learned that OCD can change themes and it seems like that’s what’s happening to me. You are definitely not alone in this. ❤️🩹
Maybe its similar to yours ? I have a feeling I've done something, but there is no full memories to back it up, its just a feeling knowing I did whag my mind is trying to remember and my mind constantly tries to search and search for the actual memory and I try to supress but I'm just scared of false memories. My mind also shows me some real events and mixes them in with that feeling of what I've "done" which makes it worse and feels more believable. :/
@InkJoy123 Yeah…..I get the last part….like I get emotions and scenes of real events and they mixed up with the false memory and it makes it seem more real….
@InkJoy123 Same has been happening to me lately. It’s strange how OCD does that. I feared psychosis when I first thought about that and maybe I still do, but one thing I read in the IMP of the mind is that if you worry about it, it’s not psychosis and you’re not delusional. It’s your OCD. Are you seeing a therapist yet?
@Stephie22 I am halfway in, and I really recommend reading the book “The IMP of the mind” by Lee Baer. It’s based on intrusive/bad thoughts.
im going to be vague here, but basically i did something in the past that i regret and it became a huge point of my OCD but i have talked to my therapist and i have mostly moved past it. i watched a video by an OCD youtuber that really put it into perspective. anyway, i have been with minimal worry for a few days, but now im having worries related to i think false memory? basically it’s like “oh but what if i said/ did this and just forgot that means i harmed this person im a bad person”. to me it sounds like textbook OCD but im just wondering if anyone else has experienced false memory / real event at the same time. i have a really horrible memory which is making it even more stressful. any responses are appreciated!
Does anyone else’s false memory intrusive thoughts of what could have happened feel very, very real?
So. I was in a traumatic relationship. for a long time. it was filled with gaslighting, manipulation, abuse, cheating ect. I would OBSESS over finding out where they were, what they were doing, who they were talking too. but I couldn’t leave. I tried so hard but I never could. they would call me names, physically hurt me, throw things, break things. because I would question them all the time. but I just couldn’t leave. no matter what I knew. they would manipulate me. I fell for their childhood trauma. it’s like I lost all logic. but I also feel like I have a pretty good memory with memories. not all the way, but remembering a lot of the traumatic things. especially now that I’m no longer with them. I keep remembering things that’s happened. even from my childhood. one time way before I even started dating this person, I had an intrusive thought about a friend of mine. that was with me. and I freaked out. I thought I had acted on the intrusive thought the next day. I asked my friend for confirmation but they said nothing happened. but the memories about it feel SO REAL. so VIVID. but they swore that nothing happened and they had no idea what I was talking about. I’ve struggled with intrusive thoughts for my whole life. so fast forward to now, that ‘false memory’ from my friend randomly popped up and I started obsessing about it, and my childhood ‘memories’ that have popped up. and then I was reading an article of someone doing something horrible, and then it sounded ‘familiar’ and so then I’ve created this whole memory of me doing something similar to the article involving my partner doing it also. the memory keeps adding new things and conversations around it. when it involves an actual real memory. but it’s like it’s been twisted from what I remembered before. I also suffer from bad anxiety. I’ve stalked pictures. my search history to figure out what I was doing that say when the real event happened. and I’ve found some things but I can’t look through my texts because I got a new phone. it has been hounding me for months. MONTHS. trying to figure out if this new ‘memory’ is real or not. if it’s been fabricated by an intrusive thought from reading the article and thinking ‘what if’ or if it actually happened and because I’m no longer in this relationship it’s a ‘repressed memory’ but the thing is I have horrible horrible anxiety and I don’t think I could have gone this long knowingly that that happened without remembering it until now. because I remember a lot of the horrible things that they did. this ‘memory’ is fuzzy, but it brings me horrible anxiety when I think of it, like I feel like it happened. but I also feel like it didn’t happen. because I know I would never do anything like that. but WHAT IF I DID, because I was manipulated. idk. is this a false memory. I really need help. because it’s been debilitating. that relationship was really traumatic. and I got manipulated into a lot of things. but I wouldn’t have just went forward knowing that that happened??? there’s no way I could have just forgotten it. because before when I would think about that night it was different, until now. but what if I just made myself forget what truly happened?? I’m a pretty self aware individual, but somehow that relationship really REALLY put me into a trance somehow where I allowed things that I have no idea how I would even allow because before I met that person I would have never allowed someone to cheat on my constantly or talk to me the way they did. or allow abuse. like I don’t understand it.
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