Fear of forgetting my to do list

@777Q Thank you so much for sharing. 💜

@777Q This is so so my experience! Your post really hit home for me! I wonder if you are also obsessive about a fear of being lazy or not good enough. I think that is what files my to do list repeating.

@Anonymous I have a question for you! How do you know what you have to do for the day / week, if you deleted all your lists?

@K-Anonymous For me, before tackling this with ERP, I honestly believed that I wouldn’t know what to do or how to function without my lists. I truly believed that I needed them. I think the obsession underlying this list compulsion was the fear that I couldn’t rely on my own brain/instincts/memory to remember what I need to do. Plus, at the same time, I think I was also scared that if I forgot something important, my whole world would melt down around me. Or it would mean I’m lazy and therefore worthless. Like if I didn’t do everything on my list, I could at least check it and re-check it and manicure it and then check it again, as a way of exerting some kind of control. I honestly was shocked when my therapist suggested I deleted my main list, right then and there on my call. But I did it, and I say with the discomfort, and now I don’t keep any personal to do lists! I do still keep a list for work, for things that I truly do need to keep track of because I’d never be able remember every long-term task I have to do at some point - but I have been able to resist my compulsion to check it and read through it and check it some more. I truly believe ERP helped me to get here! Good luck to you my friend and I would be so very happy to keep talking about this, as this is the first time I’ve met someone with a similar compulsion!

@Anonymous You are literally inside my brain! This is exactly my fears.