- Date posted
- 7y
- Date posted
- 7y
Something that’s helped me is ditching the labels... across the board with all of my ocd. We see everything so very black and white, but everything for everyone is a spectrum. I have had all of those same thoughts and feelings and once I said, hmmm I’m a little bit more of this way on the Kinsey scale, not labeling it bi or gay, it helped me not freak out and become more comfortable with passing thoughts... sexuality is SOOO fluid no matter how straight you are. I have no desire to be with a woman and am happy w my boyfriend, but if I get slightly aroused by a lesbian kissing scene in a movie, I acknowledge that in that moment, something about it was appealing, the taboo of it or the sensuality, who knows but i let the thought pass and later apply that sensation towards the person I love. Hope that helps a bit...
- Date posted
- 7y
I actually gave into it on Monday and tried to come out to my boyfriend as bi!! He saw right through it, I’ve been at my wits end so I just saw it as a way out of all this pain!! On a plus side he told me that if I was bi it wouldn’t bother him at all
- Date posted
- 7y
@Laurie my boyfriend said that too. And I told him I’d be bothered with being bi just bc I would have to date girls too and it makes me uncomfortable, and I find tons of girls pretty casually, but when I talk to my friends and get constant weird sensations in my body that feel like attraction idk what to believe.
- Date posted
- 7y
Me neither @Brookenoel, the idea of being with a girl doesn’t appeal to me at all! I struggle with the sensations too and can’t tell the difference between admiration and attraction anymore it makes me so confused.
- Date posted
- 7y
We will get thru this together ??
- Date posted
- 7y
@Outgoingocd ditching labels doesn’t really help for me. Same with the sexuality is fluid thing bc people get me confused with it, I know I can be aroused by same sex scenes bc it’s sex and no matter what I’ll get a sensation, but when I’m actually involved in it I’m super into men and things like that. When I see a super cute guy I used to swoon and I’m able to on my good days , then some days it kinda gets me with just my thoughts and anxieties. I do wish I could just be head over heels for my boyfriend again. Would make thing better
- Date posted
- 7y
I am with you there! Going through the same things
- Date posted
- 7y
I feel the same way, you all are not alone!
- Date posted
- 7y
@Outgoingocd thank you, I know I like men as of now which I couldn’t say months ago even with the anxiety. But my mind always goes to “do I know I’m lesbian now” “what if these are real attractions” etc
- Date posted
- 7y
@outgoingocd YASSSS! I couldn’t agree more with you on the statement about the Kinsey scale, BUT my ocd still makes me obsess over where I’m at on it & what if it just totally flips ? Now that I’m typing it, it seems silly.
- Date posted
- 7y
I hear ya... just remember the butterflies are just another type of anxiousness lol your ocd is totally just blocking you right now, once your anxiety calms, you’ll be in a more confident place again. Good luck!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
So my OCD has been bad lately. I’ve been ruminating and obsessing over my sexuality again. And it just keeps getting worse. I hate it so much. I try to sit with the discomfort but then my ocd does the backdoor spike. And the groinal response is what keeps me looped. It SUCKS. I am not attracted to men, but my OCD is trying SO hard to convince me that I am. There have been days where I’m just so mentally exhausted that I “accept” what my ocd tells me and I just walk around a hollow, lethargic shell. But then I rethink it and I feel better. It feels like I can only find my TRUE self when I tire my nervous system out enough that it literally breaks down and has me suicidal and hopeless. And then accepting my OCD’s “truth” (that I’m attracted to men) feels like a burden and a chore. I woke up today from an OCD dream, tried to go back to sleep, and my stomach kept cramping bc I was so anxious and ruminating over my intrusive thoughts. I’m starting to doubt it being OCD anymore. My brain is too tired to fight and cry about it anymore.
- Date posted
- 22w
I’ve recovered from HOCD before and got my attraction and my usual actual identity back. I was recovered from end 2022- start 2025 until I got triggered UGHHH😭 My HOCD is REALLY trying to convince me and it’s SO annoying cause I genuinely don’t want these thoughts. I know I naturally like men and always have done so. I can’t wait for my first therapy session in two days Omg! I need your advice, not necessarily reassurance, but more advice? My HOCD is throwing random “proof” I did/ saw as a child in my face, which back then had no meaning in my life and I continued to live a perfectly heterosexual life. I’ve educated myself about arousal non concordance / child’s play, but it still doesn’t remove the HOCD. I’ve read therapists great explanations on how it’s not a sexuality issue, BUT ITS AN OCD BRAIN ISSUE. So basically I’ve been straight and i will die as straight. But my ocd is still continuing with the intrusive thoughts/flashbacks. I’ve had some moments where I haven’t done as many compulsions and had less anxiety but still had those damn thoughts and I DO NOT want those damn thoughts. I have so much proof and factual/logical explanations but HOCD is still continuing to thrive. I absolutely hate this and I feel so alone. I wish there was a reset button cause I don’t want these thoughts to happen. I want a man and I stand by that. How do y’all deal with these situations? Cause sitting with the thoughts is clearly not helping.
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- Date posted
- 17w
I feel like I'm lying to myself, like I just don't accept that I'm gay, I don't want to be gay, I don't want to feel any kind of attraction anymore, I want to go to a psychologist to find out if I really have hocd or if it's just an excuse, because it feels like I really am gay, but nothing was authentic, it all started with thoughts that made me panic extremely hard and I felt like crying and I had delusions, I don't understand why this is happening to me, I didn't like any boys before the thoughts appeared, but exactly one day after they appeared, all the boys were attractive, of all ages, I want to recover :( I'm only 17 years old, for about 2 months I've been having thoughts, I don't know what to do, I can't go to a psychologist, I need help :(
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