- Date posted
- 2y
I’m afraid of dying
Hi everyone! I need help right now and was wondering if anyone share the similar thoughts or have any insights that may help me. Last week, after escaping 2.5 years, I got Covid. It was not very bad to be honest but still I had high fever, full body aches, lost smell and taste etc. I also am a smoker which I stopped since I got my Covid result. At the same time I read about how important the indoor air quality. I ordered an air purifier right away, but then I thought about all the times in the past. How I always smoked in my room, how it smelled all the time for years, and how bad the quality of the air was. All the dust accumulated where I felt incapacitated to clean. And now with Covid my lungs took another hit. So I am freaking out about dying soon. I have dreams like everyone else, not so big dreams, but I dream about having a dog sleeping on the chair, I dream about having kids with my boyfriend etc. and now I am terrified of dying so soon and not being able to live any of those. I cannot stop thinking this, I know I should made peace with the uncertainty of potentially dying next moment but I cannot. I keep ruminating. I cannot help but resist the thought. I just want reassurance but I know it is not going to be helpful at all but I seriously crave for it. Does anyone also have a similar theme, or any tips on how to deal with this? Thank you in advance!