i just want to go to sleep for my classes in the morning but i still feel the need to do all of these compulsions or said thing will happen. this is so exhausting i want out of this routine based lifestyle. it has become debilitating.
Hi Stacie - the thoughts and compulsions and what ifs and anxiety and fear take such a toll on our mind + our bodies. Sometimes it left me exhausted and sometimes it left me wired. Are you in therapy for OCD? I know the fear makes you feel like you have to do compulsions, but you don’t have to do them and you can resist them! Truthfully, compulsions only keep us locked in the OCD cycle. Keep in mind this feeling/anxiety won’t last forever, so just try your best to weather the storm. And know that help is out there!
I'm sorry to hear that you're dealing with insomnia because of compulsions. This was definitely an issue for me as well. I see that you stated that you can't afford care at this time. Hopefully you will be able to one day soon. Have you looked into programs that the IOCDF may provide on there site? You may be able to find a therapist that accepts a sliding scale for care there. https://iocdf.org/find-help/
I have not but I will check it out, thank you!!
Absolutely! You're welcome!
I am sorry to hear this, it can be so exhausting. As I am typing this, even after years of living in recovery, I find myself exhausted by the day-to-day things of life. I think when you have OCD it just magnifies everything. The good news though is that there is hope and help available. I would highly recommend ERP if you haven't already done so, this can help you learn to resist the compulsions and allow the discomfort of the fear to be present and to pass on its own- its a process but it does work wonders. Best wishes to you.
Thank you! I am actually not in therapy due to financial reasonings I would love to but right now for me it’s just to expensive.
I'm so freaking sick of this I CAN'T fall asleep because my obsessions and fears just keep rolling and rolling. I am so freakin sleep deprived and I'm trying to keep it together. And being tired and unmotivated makes the worries so much worse. I HATE being this way, feeling so exhausted that I'm paralyzed and don't know how to handle my thoughts I'm trying to let them come and go but they're so upsetting I have a therapy appointment tomorrow so maybe I can get some help there. I just feel no relief from the obsessions and I do not know what to do.
I feel like my compulsions are taking over my life. Every freaking night i spend so much of my time doing and redoing all my actions from walking up the stairs to crossing a certain part of my room to getting it o to bed. i close my bedroom door like 9 times until it “feels right” and have to sing songs and focus on bones in my body just so that i don’t have a negative thought so that i don’t have to do it again. I’m so over it. i feel like i waste so much time stressing myself out about my thoughts and not having the thoughts so i do things to combat and distract from the thoughts and i just feel freaking insane. yes my medication is helping and makes be wayyyy better than i was three years ago but it still feel like it’s taking over my life. i cant stand it and i feel like the more i do it the more i’m getting g comfortable with other people seeing me do it which just means i’ll do it more. i just can’t !!! so many thoughts and so many actions and it’s all based on people i love so i feel guilty if i dont do the compulsion. And even when i realize that this is all ridiculous and that’s it’s apart of my OCD, i just get sad because i’m still going through with the compulsions and start thinking about how this is my life and how i’m stuck doing this stuff forever!!
Early morning havnt slept and ocd hasn't stopped for days I just want to be able to breath it's so debilitating in every way and I just feel the ocd thoughts start to pop ideas in my head and the things it comes up with like the worries are not just thoughts they are fully formed situations and very specific when I haven't even thought about it before it's like it forms this whole thing in my head subconsciously and then before I know it I'm chillin and then I'm just 50 ft under water drowning because it just throws a whole spacific situation at me that I never even thought of this effects me in every way possible and I just lay here misrible all day having seizer after seizer from stress being suicidal and just suffocating and so much more I just dread every moment I'm awake because the moment I am counsious it starts ugh it's every moment of my day just suffering so yeah really not looking forward to waking up 10 years of this and I'm exhausted the only relief I get is switching to another theme like i just wamma get pregnant so i csn obsess over that instead of what i am rn ot effects everyone around me and im just so miserable
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