dad

man these few weeks have been so hard. i’m in the process of getting diagnosed with ocd, im almost positive i have it because everything on here relates to me on an insane level. but im just so scared dude. these thoughts of me harming someone are so scary and im so scared im gonna eventually act on them and i know i never want to but its still so scary. like sometimes when i talk to my mom about it i think in the back of my head “you know you want to” when i dont, and it makes me think or gets me scared that i do. these thoughts literally just happened out of nowhere and it messes me up so bad my literal perspective on life in general is just messed up. like i view life as its more common to be a bad person and its rare/hard to be good. can someone please just pray for me or just wish me better days. i dont even like looking at myself anymore and im scared i give off creepy vibes to myself or others now, this sucks so much

He has been diagnosed with PTSD, Borderline Personality Disorder, and OCD. He's always been a character for sure, very emotional and quick to get irrationally angry but he's been taking meds over the years. Not too long ago he said something about leaving my step mom and/or killing himself along with a few other things. Things were seemingly normal after that up until recently. Him and my step mom were yelling-arguing which they rarely ever do, and my step mom finally got to a point where she told him to go elsewhere if he was going to act that way and so he did. However, he did come back that night and they argued again in the morning. From what I've gathered, he wants space from her, but she's only ever in the same room with him working or on her phone. She loves him and only ever wants to help him get better. She's the whole reason he got medicated and DID get better. He would act this way when he was with MY mom and would lash out constantly. Today I saw that he had disabled his Facebook and Instagram accounts, which he has never done and I'm concerned. Although we both struggle with OCD, this is not what this is about. I simply just need some guidance on what to do and what could possibly be going on with him. I know no one else is going to know him like I do but we don't talk like that so I don't think he'd ever tell me. I'm so afraid of him taking his own life, I've always known he's had it in him but this time I just have a horrible feeling. If I lost my dad that way I'm not sure what I'd do because he's the only person who will ever understand the way my mind works, and I really just can't imagine losing him in general.

can i get OCD from GAD dad???